So... impress me!

[scheherazade_79]

There's an urban legend about a guy who goes for an interview at Oxford. The professor giving the interview is a blue-blooded, old-school arrogant bastard. The candidate walks into the room to find the professor, feet up on the desk with a broadsheet newspaper in front of him. He barely gives the candidate a second glance. The candidate sits down nervously and waits for the interview to begin. The professor simply turns a page of his newspaper, and mutters from behind the sheets, "So... impress me!"

I'm not going to tell you just yet what the candidate did. And if you happen to already know, don't spoil things by letting it out just yet.

I want to know what you would do in this situation

Let your imaginations run riot

Scheherazade

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

There's an urban legend about a guy who goes for an interview at Oxford. The professor giving the interview is a blue-blooded, old-school arrogant bastard. The candidate walks into the room to find the professor, feet up on the desk with a broadsheet newspaper in front of him. He barely gives the candidate a second glance. The candidate sits down nervously and waits for the interview to begin. The professor simply turns a page of his newspaper, and mutters from behind the sheets, "So... impress me!"

I'm not going to tell you just yet what the candidate did. And if you happen to already know, don't spoil things by letting it out just yet.

I want to know what you would do in this situation

Let your imaginations run riot

Scheherazade

I brutally and cleverly...

...hand him my resume.

 

[zeb1094]

I tell him to turn to Section A Page 1 and there is where he will find my resume. I had previously paid a large sum of money to have it printed there that morning!

 

[BlackShanglan]

I'm quite astonished at the first thing that popped to mind. It's wholly out of character for me, but I'll post it if only to make others laugh as much at the idea of me ever doing this as I did:

Press the cool steel of a pistol's muzzle lightly to his temple, then explain in quiet and gentle tones why I sincerely consider respect for others the most cardinal of all virtues. Having finished, take a seat calmly and await commencement of the interview.

(As if in the history the world I would ever be likely to even own a pistol. But it would have a certain style.)

(Pondering this further, I think it's She's AV that put this into my head.)

Shanglan

 

[Guest]

There's an urban legend about a guy who goes for an interview at Oxford. The professor giving the interview is a blue-blooded, old-school arrogant bastard. The candidate walks into the room to find the professor, feet up on the desk with a broadsheet newspaper in front of him. He barely gives the candidate a second glance. The candidate sits down nervously and waits for the interview to begin. The professor simply turns a page of his newspaper, and mutters from behind the sheets, "So... impress me!"

I'm not going to tell you just yet what the candidate did. And if you happen to already know, don't spoil things by letting it out just yet.

I want to know what you would do in this situation

Let your imaginations run riot

Scheherazade

I'd LIKE to think I'd knock his feet off his desk, grab his paper, and inform him that it was his job to impress ME and he'd just failed in a miserable way I'd be sure to broadcast far and wide, the internet being what it is.

In reality, I'd probably just stare at him for a few minutes and then walk out -- making sure to break any glass in his door with the slam.

 

[Aurora Black]

I think I'd rip the newspaper out of his hands. I can't stand it when I'm supposedly talking with someone and they're reading or watching TV instead. Fuck that.

 

[Affirmation]

I'd calmly walk towards the Professor, take out my lighter, and set fire to the newspaper.

--Affirmation

 

[geronimo_appleby]

tell him to turn the paper around the right way, and to get the fuck out of my chair.

 

[BigFatMeat]

I snatch the paper out of his hand, rear back, and "impress" my fist into his face.

 

[Liar]

"Dude, have you walked around with that dog turd smeared into your left sole all day?"

 

[Aurora Black]

"Dude, have you walked around with that dog turd smeared into your left sole all day?"

Bleeaarggghhh!

 

[babiesmiles]

I had such a young bastard "professor assistant" doing a similar thing to me when I was my last year to University ( I think you call it Law school in US ) and I was a lucky lass cause I had just found out a couple of legal logic mistakes in his latest publication ...lol ...

It ended that I impressed him so much he asked me to to collaborate with him for his next one he was working at ... but I refused cause I was already cooperating with his boss !

Life is good sometimes ...lol

 

[rgraham666]

I'd laugh and leave. I don't have to impress anybody.

 

[Aurora Black]

I'd laugh and leave. I don't have to impress anybody.

That's the spirit.

 

[minsue]

I'm quite astonished at the first thing that popped to mind. It's wholly out of character for me, but I'll post it if only to make others laugh as much at the idea of me ever doing this as I did:

Press the cool steel of a pistol's muzzle lightly to his temple, then explain in quiet and gentle tones why I sincerely consider respect for others the most cardinal of all virtues. Having finished, take a seat calmly and await commencement of the interview.

(As if in the history the world I would ever be likely to even own a pistol. But it would have a certain style.)

(Pondering this further, I think it's She's AV that put this into my head.)

Shanglan

Only you could carry that off with style, Shang.

 

[chris 44]

Impress me...

Okay, I'll try...

1. The professor is a man.

2. I am a woman

3. Now use your imagination !

4. Okay - I scream loudly, rip open my blouse, mess my hair, and run out of the office with crocodile tears streaming down my face. That should confirm my place.

Chris

 

[Aurora Black]

Okay, I'll try...

1. The professor is a man.

2. I am a woman

3. Now use your imagination !

4. Okay - I scream loudly, rip open my blouse, mess my hair, and run out of the office with crocodile tears streaming down my face. That should confirm my place.

Chris

That's not funny, that's sexual blackmail.

 

[entitled]

Okay, I'll try...

1. The professor is a man.

2. I am a woman

3. Now use your imagination !

4. Okay - I scream loudly, rip open my blouse, mess my hair, and run out of the office with crocodile tears streaming down my face. That should confirm my place.

Chris

Or, if you are man, you could do the same thing with your pants around your ankles.

 

[chris 44]

Or, if you are man, you could do the same thing with your pants around your ankles.

Er - yes I suppose I could, but I was trying to make the point that most people seem to assume the student's sex to be male... even the women amongst us

 

[BlackShanglan]

Er - yes I suppose I could, but I was trying to make the point that most people seem to assume the student's sex to be male... even the women amongst us

Heavens no. I assumed genderless horse.

(Don't ask how I hold the pistol.)

 

[BlackShanglan]

I'd calmly walk towards the Professor, take out my lighter, and set fire to the newspaper.

--Affirmation

Simple and beautiful.

 

[Guest]

id tell him that im a lesbian and for that reason he has ta give me the chance. Diversity and discriminatory laws and all that.

 

[chris 44]

Heavens no. I assumed genderless horse.

(Don't ask how I hold the pistol.)

With difficulty...

 

[chris 44]

Heavens no. I assumed genderless horse.

(Don't ask how I hold the pistol.)

With difficulty...
And very carefully

 

[entitled]

Could always... Nah, too cruel.
Then there's... Wouldn't be carrying it with me. Never mind.
Or there's taking... but that wouldn't be healthy.

Oh, i know! Simply let him know that it's not worth trying to impress somebody who's not paying attention. Or possibly let him know in no uncertain terms that some people have raised their children to show respect to everybody, no matter what the circumstances. Get that 'yo momma' thing in there.