So... hey!

[Wild_Honey_66]

Hi everyone! I'm Honey.

After years of being a closet writer, I finally got off my butt and am actually writing something down.

No, you can't see it. Well some of you can. But only if you tie me up and rub Ben-Gay on the soles of my feet. Please, please tie me up... okay, getting off track here.

Today I need help with words or phrases to describe a lady's fun bits that don't make me cringe or shrivel in self-consciousness. I don't want to sugar coat it e g. 'princess parts' But I need it to be sort of... nebulous.

So, ideas?

Off to hide in the cupboard, I'll peek in again later.

Thank you!

 

[NoJo]

When I'm describing a really romantic sex scene, I find "beef curtains" works pretty well.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

When I'm describing a really romantic sex scene, I find "beef curtains" works pretty well.

^^ single and looking

 

[jomar]

When I'm describing a really romantic sex scene, I find "beef curtains" works pretty well.

Well, on this side of the pond it's "meat curtains."

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Well, on this side of the pond it's "meat curtains."

Equally enchanting. Many thanks.

 

[NoJo]

Another thing you can do is to get a hand mirror and take a look. I'm sure a fountain of adjectives and metaphors will simply gush out of you

 

[Kantarii]

Honey hole, juicy peach, flower pot... etc.

Hell, I cringe myself thinking I may have to use words such as gash and cunt. Even words such as pussy, vagina, slit, clit, tits, breasts, boobies, jugs, melons, knockers, hooters, and money maker are words I try to use sparingly, but damn.... there isn't many suitable words to put in their place. .... so playing in a woman's garden of Eden is the a nice alternative.

 

[NoJo]

It's hard not to sound falsely coy when the metaphors start drifting too far away from the anatomy imo.

Flowers (especially the pussy-shaped ones) are about as far as I can go without feeling positively Victorian, my dear.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Another thing you can do is to get a hand mirror and take a look. I'm sure a fountain of adjectives and metaphors will simply gush out of you

I can't look. You do it.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Honey hole, juicy peach, flower pot... etc.

Hell, I cringe myself thinking I may have to use words such as gash and cunt. Even words such as pussy, vagina, slit, clit, tits, breasts, boobies, jugs, melons, knockers, hooters, and money maker are words I try to use sparingly, but damn.... there isn't many suitable words to put in their place. .... so playing in a woman's garden of Eden is the a nice alternative.

I should explain. It's really not that I am embarrassed to use them in the proper context. For example, I have no problem with a phrase such as, 'GA is such a cunt.' It's more that they don't fit my writing style.

I like the garden metaphor, I'm going to tuck that one away, thank you!

 

[TxRad]

Hi everyone! I'm Honey.

After years of being a closet writer, I finally got off my butt and am actually writing something down.

No, you can't see it. Well some of you can. But only if you tie me up and rub Ben-Gay on the soles of my feet. Please, please tie me up... okay, getting off track here.

Today I need help with words or phrases to describe a lady's fun bits that don't make me cringe or shrivel in self-consciousness. I don't want to sugar coat it e g. 'princess parts' But I need it to be sort of... nebulous.

So, ideas?

Off to hide in the cupboard, I'll peek in again later.

Thank you!

Boy, did you ever catch the rowdy afternooner crowd.

Since this is basically a porn site, ok, call it erotica if ya like, most don't mince words about lady parts or guy parts for that matter. Kantarii made a few lady like suggestions that will probably work but my best suggestion is to buck up and use the words that fit.

What do you call yours? That alone should give you a start.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

It's hard not to sound falsely coy when the metaphors start drifting too far away from the anatomy imo.

Flowers (especially the pussy-shaped ones) are about as far as I can go without feeling positively Victorian, my dear.

Fair point, and one worth keeping in mind. Thank you.

 

[NoJo]

I've been scared of "cunt" ever since a very un-prudish female friend of mine objected to it vehemently. And I don't mean when used as a term of abuse.

So I now avoid it in my stories. There's been a few of threads about this, listing a ton of pretty good alternative words for what my father used to call "A Lady's Thing" -- He swore very colourfully most of the time, so this was just really a sort of litotes.

 

[NoJo]

What do you call yours? That alone should give you a start.

They're like cats, you can call them what you like, they still won't come when you call them

 

[StrangeLife]

If in doubt, food analogies always work.

I have used "wrapping my baguette in her crepe", "marinading my manhood in her dressing" and "sinking my teeth into a prime grade fur-burger", and they were fairly well received.

You never go wrong with good food... my mom used to say so.
http://i.imgur.com/cgarl8Z.gif

 

[NoJo]

If in doubt, food analogies always work.

I have used "wrapping my baguette in her crepe", "marinading my manhood in her dressing" and "sinking my teeth into a prime grade fur-burger", and they were fairly well received.

You never go wrong with good food... my mom used to say so.
http://i.imgur.com/cgarl8Z.gif

Man I ever got one of them fur-burgers in my local BK I'd take it back and complain to the manager.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Boy, did you ever catch the rowdy afternooner crowd.

Since this is basically a porn site, ok, call it erotica if ya like, most don't mince words about lady parts or guy parts for that matter. Kantarii made a few lady like suggestions that will probably work but my best suggestion is to buck up and use the words that fit.

What do you call yours? That alone should give you a start.

Thank you for your concern. It's possible that I may already be acquainted with one or two of these troublemakers.

Again, I'm not actually opposed to common slang terms, it's just that I feel they seem out of place in my writing. Something for me to work on, obvs.

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

I've been scared of "cunt" ever since a very un-prudish female friend of mine objected to it vehemently. And I don't mean when used as a term of abuse.

So I now avoid it in my stories. There's been a few of threads about this, listing a ton of pretty good alternative words for what my father used to call "A Lady's Thing" -- He swore very colourfully most of the time, so this was just really a sort of litotes.

Sorry, did you say you were scared of cunts?

*whips out my strap-on*

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

They're like cats, you can call them what you like, they still won't come when you call them

Open a can of food and watch your pussy come running. Pussies are hungry things.

 

[EverLux]

I only use words that won't make me cringe. At first, this consisted solely of pussy and cunt. I've recently added sex, because that seems to be the most widely used term in the romance novels I read.

Now, that's only if you're referring to the area as a whole. People get all kinds of creative when referring to the individual bits. I mean, the clit is an integral part of the action, but there's only so many times you can stick it into one paragraph, right? Bundle of nerves, I can read without giggling... but nubbin? Button? I don't know... depends on whether the words fit the character's personality or the tone of the story.

I'm pretty sure I use folds and opening way more than I should. And don't even get me started on terms for a woman's natural lubrication. Juices, arousal, fluids... I may have even used honey, once.

And now I'm overthinking everything, and my next sex scene is going to take forever to write. Thanks a lot.

(Also, hi! )

 

[EverLux]

When I'm describing a really romantic sex scene, I find "beef curtains" works pretty well.

This sentence went nowhere near where I thought it would go.

 

[Kantarii]

I'd die laughing if I ever heard a guy publicly say he'd like to stick his pudding pickle in a woman's flower pot to sew his seeds of his lustful desiresKant

Yeah, the garden metaphor is nice, but when a woman offers it to a guy, she should make it clear he is to not literally bite her juicy peach in the garden of Eden lest he get the curse of the high heels - to - the - balls and have his ass kicked right out of Eden never to return.. haha

 

[NoJo]

I'd die laughing if I ever heard a guy publicly say he'd like to stick his pudding pickle in a woman's flower pot to sew his seeds of his lustful desiresKant

Yeah, the garden metaphor is nice, but when a woman offers it to a guy, she should make it clear he is to not literally bite her juicy peach in the garden of Eden lest he get the curse of the high heels - to - the - balls and have his ass kicked right out of Eden never to return.. haha

Thanks! Now I know how to get that high-heel to the balls. It never fucking works when I ask for it directly. The trick is I have to bite her peach in her Garden of Eden first. Thanks again, it's a like you've given me a game-cheat to get past a level

 

[twistedsickmind]

Orchid

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

If in doubt, food analogies always work.

I have used "wrapping my baguette in her crepe", "marinading my manhood in her dressing" and "sinking my teeth into a prime grade fur-burger", and they were fairly well received.

You never go wrong with good food... my mom used to say so.
http://i.imgur.com/cgarl8Z.gif

The first two have some humorous appeal, but fur-burger? Maybe not.