Slavish Imitation

Joined
Apr 21, 2007
Posts
5,507
Slavish Imitation

It's a term I learned long ago within the context of traditional painting. Students of a particular era were often told that imitation of the works of the Great Masters was a worthwhile practice method for learning how to paint. For all I know, that concept may still be in place in the art education world. So they'd actually sit and paint an exact copy of the Mona Lisa, or a Rembrandt, or whatever, and I suppose it may actually have been useful, in its way, to learn color and brushwork by copying a master.

I've thought about that concept a lot, mostly because I think it's a cool phrase, whatever it means, and tried my own version of it in writing occasionally. But I hadn't really thought of it as applying to writing in the way I suddenly did last week, when I watched the biography of Hunter S. Thompson entitled “Buy the Ticket, Take the Ride.” It's excellent, by the way. As a young writer, Thompson apparently spent time laboriously re-typing the works of Faulkner and Hemingway and other writers actually word for word. Whole novels. He said he “wanted to know how it felt to write that well.”

That blew my damn mind. I have occasionally tried some imitative forms – writing in the style of this or that author, most of the time doing parodies (yes, MTVM, I see you) but the idea of just letting your hands and mind learn structure and sentence rhythm that way, in that exacting fashion, really blew me away.

This thread is not for diligently retyping all the works of Eliot. But it is a space for the imitative, the response poem, the dialogue, the attempts at a particular style, and of course, the parody and the homage. I got all inspired by this concept, so I thought some of you might as well.

There have been a few times when someone's work here – or elsewhere, for that matter - inspired me to want to respond in a similar style, or to address the same scene or the same issue. Wicked Eve's blog posts are so evocative that I've often wanted to write pieces in response to them, for example. I've been too intimidated by their vividness to try to respond, but maybe, if she lets me... So this can be a place for that too, acknowledging someone's concept and bouncing off of it with your own piece. I've seen some very successful “dialogues” develop between poets in threads around here.

But more importantly, one could focus on the "masters." The famous poets, the ones you most admire, most wish to emulate. So for example, pick a topic and address it in several different styles. How would William Carlos Williams describe this moment? What about Whitman approaching the same moment, or Brautigan or Raymond Carver or Byron or Gertrude Stein? Write about one thing from all those points of view, or others. Or respond to someone's work. Talk to Sylvia Plath about the whole Daddy thing; see if you can get her to feel better. Show Coleridge how to loosen up a little. Take Rumi to your Halloween party and see what he thinks.

It's a stretching exercise. A game. A conversation. No pressure. Just a new way to exercise.

bijou
 
If we should be always so
of anything the pines whisper green
in copper crackle months

our arms encircle, seriously
at length from strangers we kissed into memory
as if you and I had disappeared to wonder

if we cancelled everything
but our shadows
(and they porous) to filter hatred
in absurd squalls

windblown and we

could lean out of ourselves,
weep and laugh for our secret

love is carved on the trunk of an oak.
Everyone can see why

Can’t you be indifferent
like the slender branches shrug
and grow?
 
attempt at a Wicked Eve-style blog entry.



I put a note on his kitchen counter for him the other morning. It said.
I left a fierce orgasm waiting for you in the shower.

I pictured it, that orgasm, all made of water and soap and slickness, and the most shocking images of what I'd do to a number of people if I got them where I wanted them, all those things combined in one entity that was lurking in his innocuous shower, waiting for him to come home in the morning from the overnight shift, and it seemed to me a live thing, some redhot urge that would leap out at him, as soon as he got home and turned on the water.

What did it look like, that particular climax, as it waited for him? I could hear it, all moans and high frequencies, but I couldn't see it. I know it was there, though. He confirmed it later, how it accosted him as he stepped under the hot running water, wrapped itself around his cock and sucked on it till he couldn't resist.

I'm sure the juice ran down the drain with the water. I wish I'd been there to catch it.
 
Trash from Nash

If Literotica had been known to Ogden,
verses would have flowed when he logged in,
for inspiration is never lacking on the forum
where if the tits and bits are yours, then whorem,
and what could be more delight to a poet,
when women who inspires erections, feel obliged to blow it.
 
This is a fun exercise bijou. I was trying to channel ee cummings, which I did by reading a whole bunch of his poems, then writing my own. I'm not sure how well I emulated him, but I like the poem, so who cares? :D

I've done this before with Yeats--well I've written about Yeats, I'm not sure I could ever come near matching that magical voice of his.

I think we all have touches of the poets we most admire. Imitation is a way of learning, trying on styles to see what fits and customizing until one's own voice emerges. I have to think about who I wanna try next.
 
unpredictablebijou said:
attempt at a Wicked Eve-style blog entry.



I put a note on his kitchen counter for him the other morning. It said.
I left a fierce orgasm waiting for you in the shower.

I pictured it, that orgasm, all made of water and soap and slickness, and the most shocking images of what I'd do to a number of people if I got them where I wanted them, all those things combined in one entity that was lurking in his innocuous shower, waiting for him to come home in the morning from the overnight shift, and it seemed to me a live thing, some redhot urge that would leap out at him, as soon as he got home and turned on the water.

What did it look like, that particular climax, as it waited for him? I could hear it, all moans and high frequencies, but I couldn't see it. I know it was there, though. He confirmed it later, how it accosted him as he stepped under the hot running water, wrapped itself around his cock and sucked on it till he couldn't resist.

I'm sure the juice ran down the drain with the water. I wish I'd been there to catch it.
Evie does write kick-ass blog entries, don't she? She and DA are the best.

This sounds more like you than Eve, but it sounds good.

It would be interesting to have her comment on it. Hmmm? :rolleyes:
 
Cheap Imitation

i am tender as a red balloon
swollen sweet on helium
tethered to some unheld string
to soar, as always soar some not-held things

on our swift motorcycle love, high
and unstable at any speed(like this one
wind-whipped cowlicked faery hair)
do not you please here now unsheath

the pellet gun of your clean frown
for love is our delicate membrane
honey(don't you See?)and
what so doughy rises slowly up

much quicklier comes reining down
but this is a sonnet, so—
 
Maybe I should have picked a shorter poem...

Can you not see the blood that's dripping, O my lovers
before the knife that cuts my skin?
It waits brilliant red inside my flesh that covers
up the veins it's hiding in.
The sad poets moan their weeping sonnets,
The sad singers cry their bluesy rags,
The sad widows hide inside their bonnets,
The sad mothers fold the dead soldiers'flags
But the red, red blood, O my lovers,
it is flowing freely
It is flowing cross the foreign lands where hovers
the dark shadow of lost wars.

Truth be know about that blood that drips
is that it's shed on rocky sand
between death's fingers as it grips
and squeezes hope out of the land
and all who shelter there inside the borderline
scratched thinly into the ground
by a bayonet edge honed sharp and fine
and religion's threads the folk are bound
to remain inside this wartorn soul
to bleed upon the sorrowing soil
where gravediggers dig yet one more hole
to bed the weary from life's toil.

To sleep, to sleep the angels bless
the dead as they lie upon their beds
with tears of sorrow they caress
the blank eyes rolled back into their heads
goodnight sweet son of unknown mother
fair is her gift of blood
to angels as they weep for another
love trod down into earth and mud.
They bear this burden and hold it high
as the mothers keen and bleed
their hearts out of their mouth and sigh
as they watch him burn, their seed.


E. B. B.'s poem goes on for about 4 more stanzas but I was getting bored with maudlin. I don't even want to edit...
 
No no baby. It's not you. It's kinda too quiet in here in general.

And I was just so intimidated by the EBB piece I had to go away and think for a long time about what I want to put in here next.

Working on a thing about drinking with Edgar Allen Poe but it's going nowhere.

Myself, I am learning to type without my index finger. And I've been told I'm still doing too much with this injury. They have threatened me with a more serious brace if I don't quit taking off the brace and then re-injuring it trying to write. So yeah. I'm actually getting pretty fast at the nine-finger method. But my error rate is appalling. I'll have horrifying habits when this heals up.

If the rest of the world is anything like my little corner, there are a lot of people in some sort of mayhem this past week or two. So I'm not surprised it's been quiet.

you go grrrl. You're not killing anything, I promise.

bj
 
champagne1982 said:
Maybe I should have picked a shorter poem...

Can you not see the blood that's dripping, O my lovers
before the knife that cuts my skin?
It waits brilliant red inside my flesh that covers
.....
their hearts out of their mouth and sigh
as they watch him burn, their seed.


E. B. B.'s poem goes on for about 4 more stanzas but I was getting bored with maudlin. I don't even want to edit...


The thread is not dead, but I am quite impressed.
 
I feel better. I went and pushed out a poem.

Thank you all for giving me a bit of smile food.
 
champagne1982 said:
I feel better. I went and pushed out a poem.

Thank you all for giving me a bit of smile food.

Lol. Sounds like labor. How long did you have to push? :p
 
Fucking Artaud

1.
He wants it like I do: a confrontation,
two monsters in a fever dream.
He knows how wrong is sometimes
more than right, how if you surge in
to your own red Wrong
with your whole fierce mouth and every fingernail
you may come out the other side
laughing, all Right. What we do
is unspeakable
precarious:
those godawful cothurni
and the masks, heavy,
and they hurt, and at times
it's hard to breathe
under his rich anger
and his brocade.
God, though,
how tall he makes me stand
and stamp, a wild wrong to beat
and tame and violate til he peels me
backwards and out of my skin
hate pleasure and anger bone, that
violent gift, the brute force of joy,
and his anguished hands gripping
too hard, and finally
hard enough.
 
unpredictablebijou said:
Fucking Artaud

1.
He wants it like I do: a confrontation,
two monsters in a fever dream.
He knows how wrong is sometimes
more than right, how if you surge in
to your own red Wrong
with your whole fierce mouth and every fingernail
you may come out the other side
laughing, all Right. What we do
is unspeakable
precarious:
those godawful cothurni
and the masks, heavy,
and they hurt, and at times
it's hard to breathe
under his rich anger
and his brocade.
God, though,
how tall he makes me stand
and stamp, a wild wrong to beat
and tame and violate til he peels me
backwards and out of my skin
hate pleasure and anger bone, that
violent gift, the brute force of joy,
and his anguished hands gripping
too hard, and finally
hard enough.
I love you.

Yeah this was, uh, high on the Good Meter. High.
 
Glad you're enjoying it. Harsher critique is also welcome. This is very much a rough draft.

Fucking Artaud


2.
I confess
it was the costume I fucked
those tall boots, seven league
seven inch heels,
it was the mad god mask,
tattooed with candlelight
the tongue protruding
the totem, the thick carved staff.
I admit I don't know
what I took,
phallus, fist or fire
but I remember its machinery
I know the howls I heard
through the megaphone mouth
of animal Oedipus Equus
the curses and blessings
holy and horrific, and he
was right: one leads
to the other, demon to divine.
 
unpredictablebijou said:
Glad you're enjoying it. Harsher critique is also welcome. This is very much a rough draft.

Fucking Artaud


2.
I confess
it was the costume I fucked
those tall boots, seven league
seven inch heels,
it was the mad god mask,
tattooed with candlelight
the tongue protruding
the totem, the thick carved staff.
I admit I don't know
what I took,
phallus, fist or fire
but I remember its machinery
I know the howls I heard
through the megaphone mouth
of animal Oedipus Equus
the curses and blessings
holy and horrific, and he
was right: one leads
to the other, demon to divine.
I like 'em big too.

megaphone mouth seems too modern here. I'm not sure what I'd suggest instead. Through the bucktoothed grin of animal... maybe wide-jawed. I don't know, you go from organic to mechanical and it isn't ringing true to me.
 
My name is not "Critique." Nor is it "Earl."

unpredictablebijou said:
Glad you're enjoying it. Harsher critique is also welcome. This is very much a rough draft.

Fucking Artaud


2.
I confess
it was the costume I fucked
those tall boots, seven league
seven inch heels,
it was the mad god mask,
tattooed with candlelight
the tongue protruding
the totem, the thick carved staff.
I admit I don't know
what I took,
phallus, fist or fire
but I remember its machinery
I know the howls I heard
through the megaphone mouth
of animal Oedipus Equus
the curses and blessings
holy and horrific, and he
was right: one leads
to the other, demon to divine.
Artaud, with his fierce dimples
stands, so beautiful,
crafting magic and astrology.

Here, his Parisian brilliance
serves as opiate. But,
God, he, and his double, always die,

so all that's left is something paper,
but of a better insulator
nothing's found. Hey, what's the score
 
champagne1982 said:
I like 'em big too.

megaphone mouth seems too modern here. I'm not sure what I'd suggest instead. Through the bucktoothed grin of animal... maybe wide-jawed. I don't know, you go from organic to mechanical and it isn't ringing true to me.

*snerk* Don't we all.

Noted. It's a reference to the fact that the masks actors wore in traditional Greek tragedy are thought to have been built with some sort of amplifying capability. But they didn't, I suspect, have megaphones as such. So yeah, the word is both too modern and too mechanistic.

I will go on an adjective hunt straightaway. Thanks!

bijou
 
I've been reading Gertrude Stein



A Scene, A Stable Scene

But yes, he'd bend me, press me apart, the little tail. Horse, he'd say, pony pony and so much my long legs hooved, backward he'd make my back for riding. Want to see, see it, the horse only wants to feel the wave and flutter of coming, and he to know that he had made that and so the robes would part for the hand and I'd ride it up pony pony till it was there and then slam

deep and stay

still so he could feel his design, the machinery he had set into play, the thing to ride and ride, the hooved thing, the stamping thing, the clench and shiver thing, the inside the animal.







merely a draft, or perhaps a pitiful but sincere homage.
bijou
 
Fucking Artaud

3.
I am proud
to be worth beating.
my limbs are good stretched
and strung, and god, the hand,
the crop, how hard
he gets. I can see it
looking back, secretly, over my shoulder
that quick stroke, breathless, one hand
gripping finger bruises onto my hip
and the other
quick hand,
that sharp red
quick in his hand.

I am honored
to be dressed as That Bitch,
pilloried in lipstick
and taken down for every one of them
who would not let him
make her come. I am strong enough
to hold up my head
in that snarling, frigid mask
and let the ice and metal
break me down.
He punishes them with my moans;
I am a vengeful orgasm. I am a thousand.
My script is to beg him to stop
so he can say no
and put the edge on me
again, take me over,
again. Once for every time
That Bitch wouldn't come.
 
Mistress ordered me to post this.

Well, actually, she more like suggested that I post it. She was very severe in her recommendation, though. I sensed her wrath.

The only slave I am is hers. My imitation, though, well...
Fucking Lovelace
(Algorithm in Praise of Wiles)

Ada, not Linda,
opened differentially,

not unlike a Babbage,
green and leafy and

oh, damp, yet somehow
crisply iterative.

It always is in loops
the real work gets done.​
I grovel, Mistress, as mere bescattered gravel 'neath your soft feet. :rolleyes:
 
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