Simple things you just won't do

[Christobal]

I won't dig post holes. I will help you put up fence but I won't dig post holes.

No, I won't help you in some kind of scam. Big or small.

No I will never provide you an alibi.

There are a lot more but you get the drift.

What won't you do?

 

[Typo Fu Master]

I won't let someone borrow my phone to make a call. If it appears to be a genuine emergency I might make an exception. But they better be about to lose their shit in front of me.

 

[ForestFlame]

I won't be horrible to someone just because you don't like them, whether I am your friend or not.

 

[RobDownSouth]

Be your downline for your Amway empire.

 

[Christobal]

I won't let someone borrow my phone to make a call. If it appears to be a genuine emergency I might make an exception. But they better be about to lose their shit in front of me.

That has never been a problem for me. I have plenty of minutes. Well unless the person is shady looking and I think they might run off with my phone.

 

[Jamiegeo]

Pay for sex.
Buy ANY kind of 'mens' makeup or fucking moisturizer product.
Let anyone touch my feet.
Eat anchovies,olives or vegemite like products.
Concede traffic position to any fuckwit that races up the inside and tries to forcefully cut in/merge.
Call speed cameras "safety cameras".
Tell any parent how to raise their own kid/s.
Order pretentious named food or coffee.
Respect any male that wears skinny legged trousers.
Call anyone 'Bro' unless they actually are.
Disrespect anyone for serving in the military.
'Celebrity' anything.
Angla Merkil(?)
Stare at myself in reflection or mirror for any longer than is absolutley nessesary.
Run out of things to post in this thread.

 

[Greypowerful]

Post holes are evil! With a 1.5 metre / 4'-6" frost line, it's gonna be TWO younger dudes and a gas auger..

Some good ones, above. Mine include:

Run your own scam!
I avoid "dogpiling"
If I have been told something in confidence, it STAYS there.
The easy lie, for popular support, is anathema to me. I'm NOT going there.

 

[chillywilly2]

For post holes, always rent the one man auger, the 2 man will kill you

I won't buy stolen merchandise no matter how good the deal.
I will not support a thief

 

[NOIRTRASH]

Prostitues are the way to go. They eliminate all the happy horse shit average gals bring to luv. Pay her a fair price with a good tip and all are happy.

 

[Christobal]

Pay for sex is a good one. Dom perignon is a good champagne. But the last I looked it was $140.00 a bottle. At that price it better be be as good as sex but I wouldn't pay that much for either.

 

[dacoach44]

But wait....

Pay for sex is a good one. Dom perignon is a good champagne. But the last I looked it was $140.00 a bottle. At that price it better be be as good as sex but I wouldn't pay that much for either.

One day just south of the border, I bargained with 6 fun little whores for an overnighter, in Espanol. Now THAT was almost as much fun as the sex. They were all sitting around a picnic table at El Pato cafe, down in Progreso.

http://i.imgur.com/ABR2HOH.jpg

 

[RobDownSouth]

That has never been a problem for me. I have plenty of minutes. Well unless the person is shady looking and I think they might run off with my phone.

Who DOESN'T have unlimited minutes in 2017?

 

[Saint Peter]

I will not let Garnate near my ass if she is holding an old skool T-10 in christmas green.

 

[NOIRTRASH]

With hookers you don't gotta wine and dine them, you don't gotta entertain them, and if they don't get off from the sex, fuck them. Get the pussy and then go do something fun.

 

[Typo Fu Master]

It's not and never was about the minutes. I just don't like the idea of someone else using my phone. Most of the people I associate with on a daily basis are, at best, associates. They're certainly not my friends. I know nothing much about them. Who's to say what they do on their own time? What nefarious plots are they hatching? I could inadvertently become an accessory! I might receive an unexpected and most unwelcome knock on my door by official people with Questions About My Motives!! [/paranoid conspiracy theory]

 

[chillywilly2]

It's not and never was about the minutes. I just don't like the idea of someone else using my phone. Most of the people I associate with on a daily basis are, at best, associates. They're certainly not my friends. I know nothing much about them. Who's to say what they do on their own time? What nefarious plots are they hatching? I could inadvertently become an accessory! I might receive an unexpected and most unwelcome knock on my door by official people with Questions About My Motives!! [/paranoid conspiracy theory]

You frequent places like this, sooner or later, thats gonna happen anyway

 

[Comshaw]

It's not and never was about the minutes. I just don't like the idea of someone else using my phone. Most of the people I associate with on a daily basis are, at best, associates. They're certainly not my friends. I know nothing much about them. Who's to say what they do on their own time? What nefarious plots are they hatching? I could inadvertently become an accessory! I might receive an unexpected and most unwelcome knock on my door by official people with Questions About My Motives!! [/paranoid conspiracy theory]

That's possible and it's possible monkeys will fly out of my butt.

https://pics.onsizzle.com/caution-tin-foil-hat-area-6765119.png

Comshaw

 

[juttjaw]

Never thought about paying for sex...
Never had a need to.
I will NOT call Olive Garden good food.
I will NOT go below chest level for my alcohol.
I will NOT tell you that dress doesn't make you look fat.
I will NOT, ever again, cover for a lie (ex-wife bullshit).
I will NOT give you bad advice.
I will NOT accept "I'm fine" when it clearly isn't.
I will NOT ever order the weirdest thing on the menu.
I will NOT not take it outside...
Bitch.
.

 

[Typo Fu Master]

That's possible and it's possible monkeys will fly out of my butt.

That awkward moment when you have to explain your joke to someone that doesn't appreciate your brand of humor.

 

[Garnate]

I will never pass up a list thread.
I will never mop a floor. That's why I had children.
I will never follow baking instructions properly.
I will never drive below 10 miles over the speed limit.
I will never take a selfie without earbuds on or near me.
I will never put makeup on without a glass of sangria by my side.
I will never sell a screenplay.

I will not let Garnate near my ass if she is holding an old skool T-10 in christmas green.

You said that's the one you prefer so I don't really see the problem.

I will NOT not take it outside...
Bitch.

Let's go!

 

[juttjaw]

Let's go!

You better of packed a big lunch, bitch!!

 

[Garnate]

You better of packed a big lunch, bitch!!

I've prepared a lovely lunch for us to enjoy after you've beaten the shit out of me.

Nothing baked, though, because I fucking suck at that.

 

[Christobal]

I will not let Garnate near my ass if she is holding an old skool T-10 in christmas green.

I am not even sure what that means and even less sure if I want to know.

Another thing is don't ask me to hold anything illegal for you. But mostly it's about post holes. I really hate digging post holes. If you have ever dug one you know what I mean. Even with a machine they stink on ice.

 

[Saint Peter]

I would never let my girlfriend accompany Lady G to the ladies room at the bar.

 

[jezzilee]

Hmmm sometimes I think there is not much I wouldn't do.

I won't lie for you.
I won't lie to you.
I won't let anyone disrespect me.
I won't disrespect you.
I won't be anyone's punching bag, but sex bruises, scratches, bite marks are just love letters written in flesh so there is my one exception to that rule.
I won't get married again.


Crap I could go on a while...I guess there is lots I won't do.