Showing arousal.

[wrad]

I want to ask of the women here who have a sub or who would dearly love to have one:
1.if the sub is female do you, or would you, have her lubricate when you have her in Present Position, or do you, would you, deny her?
2.If the sub is male do you, or would you, have him keep his cock hanging, fat or fully hard when attending you in your bath or shower?

 

[Betticus]

Uhhh... ??

wow..

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[HarletMinx]

B) the female body is designed to self-lubricate when aroused, and I'm not exactly sure how one goes about denying that bodily function...

A sponge?

 

[RJMasters]

I want to ask of the women here who have a sub or who would dearly love to have one:
1.if the sub is female do you, or would you, have her lubricate when you have her in Present Position, or do you, would you, deny her?
QUOTE]


Ok -

A) I have no clue what "present position" is...
B) the female body is designed to self-lubricate when aroused, and I'm not exactly sure how one goes about denying that bodily function...

If I do not miss my guess the "present position" has to do with gorean terminology. There are different positions in which the slave or submissive "presents" themselves to be used. Nnot saying this is neccessarily gorean, but could be a simillar practice of ritual being alluded to here.

As to the question of whether to allow lubricant...I can only guess that what is being asked is if the Domme allows or demands the female submissive to use lubricant in prepration of strap-on activities. The denying of which would be painful until such time the female's body could porduce enought natural lubricant to make things go a bit smoother.

But the question is poorly asked without any kind of context or further details.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[DeservingBitch]

Ah... thank you, dear. I'm finding I'm more of the school of slavery that adds "Darling" to the back end of "Master" just to make it a little more personal and all that (thankfully he finds it rather adorable), so the whole formal/position-y/prep stuff just flies straight over my head sometimes... [gracious will he have a lot of work to do... sigh...]

Haha! One of the boy I play with recently called me 'Bitch Darling' when asking me for a favor. I almost pee my pants from laughing, and the little brat now always addresses me that way. So much fun!

 

[HarletMinx]

2.If the sub is male do you, or would you, have him keep his cock hanging, fat or fully hard when attending you in your bath or shower?

Sorry, I know this is just my curiosity but why just in the shower and bath? (another that like lubrication, is a bit hard to control without some form of chastity).

I think where this question was more or less leading to is how do people as Dom/mes have their subs present themselves. I know that I have a terrible slouching problem when I sit so my mistress had me work a bit on keeping a good posture.... I think she just liked to see cleavage. Though I think your question may be pertaining to sexual positions or how a sub shows arousal in that position? (it occurred to me after typing that last line that i had restated the title.... )

-piper

 

[snowy ciara]

Wrad, you may want to clarify what you're asking.

But going back to the Gor thing that RJ mentioned....

If I remember correctly, in the later books, there was a bit of talk about if a slave "lubricated" properly. This led to a great on line debate on one of the "lifestyle" sites about if a slave is allowed to "lubricate" and when it's proper for her to do so, as if she had any choice in the manner. I mean, the body can be Pavlovian about these things. With proper training, just about anything can trigger an auto-erotic response, just as just about anything can turn it off again. For example, overly formal rituals from a "science fiction" series makes me giggle too hard to lubricate, unless the "Master" is into watersports. But the sound of Her voice saying my name in a certain way triggers "lubrication" in copious amounts.

 

[unfoundiamond]

am I really reading this...

Hm...
The question sounds like you are asking about other people almost...

My Dom has never instructed me to even touch lubricant, he may add it to a toy, never me... That's what spanking is for... (or flogging, or hair pulling, I need to stop... Its warm in here...LOL)
The point is women get wet, naturally as the post before mine explains as well, it just happens...
That's not very Dom-ly
**giggles at her proclamation**

**wanders off**

 

[helix27]

A sponge?

...bob square pants!!

swry had to

 

[unfoundiamond]

cute!

Very cute Cutie mouse, "-Im not exactly sure how one goes about denying that bodily function"... So funny with the face... I laughed out loud really...

And I realized, I forgot the male sub fat penis in the bathroom showing you thing, that's so gross, but a sub man is confusing to me. I like women as submissives... mmm... sorry.. *shakes it off* That whole guy washing you with a fat dick thing sounded like you where asking if that function should be denied too, and I don't know frankly what's worse... a hangy fat soft dick or a huge hard creepy one while he's washing you... Its the question sounding so random I think. I didn't think a guy could really control that if you are good at being sexy in general, all domly stuff aside I think everyone knows how to give a guy a hard on, I can just be the little spoon and *bam* he's hard....

 

[RJMasters]

Very cute Cutie mouse, "-Im not exactly sure how one goes about denying that bodily function"... So funny with the face... I laughed out loud really...

And I realized, I forgot the male sub fat penis in the bathroom showing you thing, that's so gross, but a sub man is confusing to me. I like women as submissives... mmm... sorry.. *shakes it off* That whole guy washing you with a fat dick thing sounded like you where asking if that function should be denied too, and I don't know frankly what's worse... a hangy fat soft dick or a huge hard creepy one while he's washing you... Its the question sounding so random I think. I didn't think a guy could really control that if you are good at being sexy in general, all domly stuff aside I think everyone knows how to give a guy a hard on, I can just be the little spoon and *bam* he's hard....

Actually, one of the things which often is part of a Domme/male sub is control over his manhood.

The question in regards to him remaining hard while bathing his mistress would be one of being ready for use if she so choose to use him. Some might require thier male submissive to remain hard during certain rituals and to remain soft at other times. This show control.

Contrary to your experience, men can learn control over their own body, but it takes some focus and concentration. And sexy is not always about looks, I am sure what makes up sexy for many male submissive is the will of their mistress and their assertion of control over them.

I am glad you admit that male submissives are confusing to you, that helps to understand why your comments are so narrow minded and some what insultingly niave. Male submissives are human beings, not abstract peices of meat. Or to put it another way, your talking about people, perhaps you should educate yourself before making such remarks as to avoid showing in the future the shallow mentality which you displayed in this post.

 

[Netzach]

I have never cared much whether a dick I have no intention of fucking is hard or not. I know most guys haven't had significant wiring changes since they first learned to avoid sweatpants in public, it's either mildly humorous or really beneath comment isn't it?

RJ, I may be atypical, but actually most D's pro and non will readily admit that if you want cock control you are talking about whether he gets to touch it or not - hard/not is a force of too many biofactors to assume things about. If I were really interested in erection prevention I'd put it in some kind of device.

Oh, and H has helped me in the bath and shower, but he's usually fully dressed as a woman when doing so.

I've also known people to be hugely turned on and soft, or dry, or even without hard nipples. The presence of said doesn't lie, but the absence doesn't mean "I'd rather be waterskiiing."

 

[myinnerslut]

The presence of said doesn't lie, but the absence doesn't mean "I'd rather be waterskiiing."

LOL

i you

 

[Netzach]

Back atcha sweetie.

 

[nh23]

I want to ask of the women here who have a sub or who would dearly love to have one:
1.if the sub is female do you, or would you, have her lubricate when you have her in Present Position, or do you, would you, deny her?
2.If the sub is male do you, or would you, have him keep his cock hanging, fat or fully hard when attending you in your bath or shower?

This reminds me of The Sleeping Beauty series by Anne Rice.. I don't know if that's where he is getting this, but I remember something of this nature from the books.

 

[unfoundiamond]

aren't all opinions one sided

RJMasters~
I know I must have said something to offend you, and the higher road would have been to explain to me why I am wrong, Insted of attacking my opinions, but eh, its all good...

So aren't everyones opinions one sided, my opinion comes from my expirience, not yours, so of course it will be one sided, makes sence to me....
I am sorry but I like to fuck men and women equally so I don't know what this "heteo-blabla coment is all about...

Yeah, I view people in a generally sexual sence untill I get to know the person behind the eyes, and looks gets everyone in the door, Sorry, I don't know why I am made to feel like my opinion is bad, granted, I had a few of the details wrong but jeez...

In fact take all of what I said and apply it to me... how's that??

Ps- I am 21, and still learning, part of why I am here is to gather information, research, and there will be times when I am dead wrong... I am sorry if I offended you, at least I am somehow mature enought to read into your scathing diasaproval and find a reason to apologize and learn, sounds like I am pretty mature for a naieve mentality...

Maybe my view of a man being sumissive is one sided, I like dominant men... I am sorry, if I want someone to bathe me she'll have tities... maybe I am tired of being objectified by men... maybe I have a reason to feel this way, to assume I have no basis for my feeling is one sided.

 

[snowy ciara]

It's not an age thing, diamond. I was welcomed when I wandered in here as an 18 year old. Open minded younger kinksters of any age and experience are welcome here, as long as they're not rude about it. I wasn't even offended until you started running down male subs right here:

And I realized, I forgot the male sub fat penis in the bathroom showing you thing, that's so gross, but a sub man is confusing to me. I like women as submissives... mmm... sorry.. *shakes it off* That whole guy washing you with a fat dick thing sounded like you where asking if that function should be denied too, and I don't know frankly what's worse... a hangy fat soft dick or a huge hard creepy one while he's washing you... Its the question sounding so random I think. I didn't think a guy could really control that if you are good at being sexy in general, all domly stuff aside I think everyone knows how to give a guy a hard on, I can just be the little spoon and *bam* he's hard....

It's possible to say "I don't understand sub males" without being rude (calling them "gross" or "creepy"), and insulting their sex drives ("I can just be the little spoon and bam" thing). Most males have a discriminatiing sexuality: just because he gets a physiological "bam" response doesn't mean he's going to squander his woody on a person who doesn't understand him, because contrary to popular belief, most guys will not boff a person they don't particularly like.

I'll be honest, I don't fully understand male subs, either. I like the heck of out many of them. But I understand this gender-based Dom/sub orientation thing even less. I don't understand dismissing anyone out of hand because they don't match my personal vision of what a Dominant or a submissive should be at all.

I guess my point is, it's not your age or youth or experience level, it's the attitude illustrated above.

Edited for saying "discrimination" instead of "discriminatING". Also added parentheses.

 

[RJMasters]

Snowy, its nice to see you on the boards again. If you could charge a smile tax on your posts, you'd be rich.

 

[lil_slave_rose]

It's not an age thing, diamond. I was welcomed when I wandered in here as an 18 year old. Open minded younger kinksters of any age and experience are welcome here, as long as they're not rude about it. I wasn't even offended until you started running down male subs right here:



It's possible to say "I don't understand sub males" without being rude (calling them "gross" or "creepy"), and insulting their sex drives ("I can just be the little spoon and bam" thing). Most males have a discriminatiing sexuality: just because he gets a physiological "bam" response doesn't mean he's going to squander his woody on a person who doesn't understand him, because contrary to popular belief, most guys will not boff a person they don't particularly like.

I'll be honest, I don't fully understand male subs, either. I like the heck of out many of them. But I understand this gender-based Dom/sub orientation thing even less. I don't understand dismissing anyone out of hand because they don't match my personal vision of what a Dominant or a submissive should be at all.

I guess my point is, it's not your age or youth or experience level, it's the attitude illustrated above.

Edited for saying "discrimination" instead of "discriminatING". Also added parentheses.

*applauds* 'nuff said...

 

[_kiana_]

I guess my point is, it's not your age or youth or experience level, it's the attitude illustrated above.

She's right diamond. At first, I didn't want to be in the same room as male submissives as they simply made me incredibly uncomfortable. I like men to be in a position of power over me, even if just in social situations. So male submissives just didn't fit into what I liked my world view to be. But I took that attitude as my problem and tried not to let it show. If I became uncomfortable at a munch or party I excused myself. There are tons of submissive males around; you can't really keep away from them. I had to learn to accept them. After all, many of them have the same drive to submit as I do, they just happen to be men. I'm better than I used to be now, but still with some hang ups.

You are entitled to your own opinion, but when it becomes insulting you'll usually only get sour grapes in return.

 

[DeservingBitch]

Adding to what others have already said:

RJMasters~
I know I must have said something to offend you, and the higher road would have been to explain to me why I am wrong, Insted of attacking my opinions, but eh, its all good...

No. It is not anybody's responsibility here to stop their life and spend their time and energy to educate you. You are the one who made the offensive comments. It is *your* responsibility to take the time and do the work of educating yourself.

So aren't everyones opinions one sided, my opinion comes from my expirience, not yours, so of course it will be one sided, makes sence to me....
I am sorry but I like to fuck men and women equally so I don't know what this "heteo-blabla coment is all about...

Well, this for instance:

Maybe my view of a man being sumissive is one sided, I like dominant men... I am sorry, if I want someone to bathe me she'll have tities... maybe I am tired of being objectified by men... maybe I have a reason to feel this way, to assume I have no basis for my feeling is one sided.

That you prefer interacting and having relationship with men that are dominant is not the issue. But suggesting as you did in your previous post, and here to a lesser extend, that there's something wrong with submissive men and that submissiveness is the exclusive 'privilege' of women IS heteronormative and offensive.

Sorry, I don't know why I am made to feel like my opinion is bad, granted, I had a few of the details wrong but jeez...

Among other things: because you dismissed submissive men as 'gross' and 'creepy', talking about them as non-human piece of meat, because you suggested there's something wrong with being men and submissive, and by extension, something wrong with Dominant women who interact with male submissives, because you suggested that men have no control over their sexuality.

Ps- I am 21, and still learning, part of why I am here is to gather information, research, and there will be times when I am dead wrong... I am sorry if I offended you, at least I am somehow mature enought to read into your scathing diasaproval and find a reason to apologize and learn, sounds like I am pretty mature for a naieve mentality...

For the record, apologies sound sincere when the person offering them acknowledges and takes responsibility for their fuck ups rather than get defensive, and show a willingness to make-up for these fuck ups, namely by taking the proper steps to avoid repeating said offense in future.

 

[HarletMinx]

because you suggested that men have no control over their sexuality.

Which brings to mind my own statement. I should know better, it's entirely possible for the male, or female in that case, sex drive to be controlled. The reactions to sexual stimuli as much physiological response as a mental one. Dominance and submission are however i think purely a characteristic of our personality and knows no gender whether you be male, female, or any degree between.

While I think that the idea of male dominance and female submission is something that's been normalized by our culture it's not in any way a natural expression of any gender. But yes, men can just as easily their place in submission and make wonderful subs at that. Actually I think theirs something adorable about a male sub on his knees with a throbbing erection helping a Dom/me bathe.

I think though that diamond's view is hardly unique. Male subs get a bad rap too often. I, as a transsexual sub, have to deal with a whole different issue, the "shemale fetish". Both can be equally tiresome.

 

[wrad]

My wife and I apologise for bringing discord to this Board. We are old and that is the last thing we wish to do.
In Australia,our generation born between the Wars, was influenced, still, by the English and Irish, whilst the four since by the Americans.
During the past forty-odd years, my wife and I have learned much from Asia, particularly from two cultures, about the Style. Two areas of our interest are, one, how trained women may lubricate only with permission no matter the method and intensity of arousal and, two, how women like to have their males show, whether subs or vanilla..
We correspond with Europeans and South Americans, and came to this Board in order to ask how some Americans think on these matters.
Thank you for reading.