Shadow Steps (Closed for Asa)

[raiguy]

Ryan nodded ever so slightly.

"Liria, I know you are scared. I wish I had more answers, but I don't. I know you are worried and confused. I wish I could tell you something that would help you, but all I can say is this. I love you, have loved you, and will love you until the day I die. I'm more than willing to wait until you figure out the answer to what you want to do. I promise I'll never hurt you, and will be here for you as long as you want me around," Ryan said softly as he stepped forward and wrapped Liria in a hug, hoping to convey comfort and security. He softly kissed the top of her head, hoping she figured out what she wanted.

 

[Asa]

A voice deep down was screaming for her to run but she could not find the strength to make her feet turn her towards the door. Then another hug... she thought she was fighting hard not to crumble into the hug but she failed as she didn't really return the hug but did almost relax into it. She stared at her dad over Ryan's shoulder and saw him smile as her eyes then closed.

I... I need to get... to get back... back to work.

Her voice was almost trance like as she tried to put a little distance between them.

Run again and don't come back if you do...

She was not telling him to run now just if he ever thought to again.

 

[raiguy]

Ryan sensed Liria stalling, fear taking over. He pulled her back into a hug, this one even more secure than the first ones.

He bent his head so it was right next to her ear, his voice barely above a whisper as he said, "I know you are scared. I know you want to run. Please have faith and trust your heart for once instead of your head. You are an amazingly smart girl. Don't be afraid to let someone in. I promise on my life that I would never hurt you. If you don't want to take the chance, then please go back to work. I'll be here if you think things through and come to a different decision."

Ryan gently raised her face, kissing her softly, trying to show her his feelings for her were honest and real. He didn't want to force her, just to let her see that he wanted to take the chance with her for something amazing.

 

[Asa]

No... I... I have a meeting to go to... Garrett was going to drive me there if "dad's meeting" didn't go well... You were the meeting.

She shook her head and moved to look at him she was glad he was back though why should could barely understand. Biting her lip... YOu know the apartment... I... I have to get to the meeting... then... I... we... We can talk then... maybe... I...

Garrett walked over and guided her out. Yeah you can't be late to a military publication meeting Liria... lets get you something to calm your nerves so you can function in the meeting Ryan will stay right where you told him.

Her Dad nodded saying his goodbyes to her then looking to Ryan.

That went well.

 

[raiguy]

Ryan shook his head. He just shrugged his shoulders, then turned to the colonel.

"So my mentor was your brother's father-in-law. Was he training me to work with you or something?" Ryan asked, then thought that maybe he didn't want to fully know that answer.

"Have you ever seen her like that?" he asked. When the colonel shook his head, he sighed.

"I'm off to her apartment. Do you have a key so I don't have to break into her place again?" Ryan asked, extending his hand.

 

[Asa]

The Col tossed him a key. We will remind her she told you to wait for her there.

With that he showed him off the base and went back to work.

Liria sat in the car talking to Garrett rambling was more like it. A hug and a kiss had her this shook up she was not able to deal with that.

I told you this day would come Liria... someone was gonna see past your work and your Dad and walk you smack into true emotion... Take it one day at a time and let things flow at their own pace... don't run and don't rush.

LIria nodded and attended her meeting and headed home

 

[raiguy]

Ryan drove to Liria's apartment and let himself in. He worried about what would happen when she got back, so busied himself by making dinner. He knew some of what she liked, so decided to fix something. He was a decent cook, but never really good at it. He prepared a simple meal of a salad, shrimp, and potatoes. He hoped Liria would like it, otherwise he was starting off on the complete wrong foot. He set two glasses out and opened the bottle of wine he brought, pouring himself a glass and taking a sip.

 

[Asa]

She knew that he would be there Garrett had reminded her and so she was not surprised when she walked in and found him there. What surprised her was he had cooked. It was nice as she actually smiled to him.

This is far and beyond anything I have ever dealt with or ever suspected that I would have to deal with so this is going to take me a while to get used to.

 

[raiguy]

Ryan nodded, then set a glass of wine in front of Liria, offering it, but not forcing her. He smiled disarmingly then said quietly, "Dinner is shrimp, potatoes and salad. I can add garlic bread if you'd like."

He was busying himself around the kitchen so he didn't freak himself or Liria out with his worrying.

 

[Asa]

She nodded taking a sip of the wine.

Thats... thats fine.

She smiled and walked over to the table to sit down.

 

[raiguy]

Ryan quickly had dinner finished, bringing it over and serving it. He sat across from Liria, waiting for her to speak as he fidgeted slightly before finally taking a bite to eat, knowing that worrying at this stage would just be a detriment.

 

[Asa]

So what do we do?

She took a bite of the food it almost also felt strange to eat in her apartment but it was nice. She glanced around.

We could put on music or something if ya want

 

[raiguy]

Ryan nodded, then got up, turning on some soft music.

"Liria, I know that you aren't sure about this, so lets talk. I don't want to force you into a relationship you don't want. What are you feeling right now?" he asked.

 

[Asa]

Feelings are not something I am all that attuned to Ryan... I mean I guess I would like to get to know you and figure out why you feel the need to want to be around me and in my life to the point of breaking into my apartment before

She sighed wishing she could better understand.

Much less figure out and understand you kissing me I mean I... thats what really threw me for a loop I really don't know why but I am just not really used to actions like that.

 

[raiguy]

Ryan smiled sadly then said, "I think your dad can partially explain why I feel the need to be around you better than I can. He seems to know more about my situation than I do."

He sat back and thought for a minute, then said, "I know that things are confusing, but I will wait for as long as it takes for you to figure it out. I promise I won't break into your apartment again, or do anything like replacing guns for you. I'll give you the space you want if that's what you ask for. I just want you to know what you want."

 

[Asa]

Having someone around wouldn't be so bad I guess. Since I guess Dad knows your car as would his team might prevent unannounced visits for checking up on me.

She smiled she felt trapped but in any situation where she had to deal with people she felt that way. She did find herself wanting this to be different and truly hoped it would be and that maybe this would make her more "normal" and sane"

 

[raiguy]

Ryan looked across to Liria, then cautiously took her hand. "If you ever want me to leave you alone, just let me know. You can relax and enjoy the food now. I know you are hungry."

He smiled, relaxing himself, happy and hopeful. One day at a time was better than he was expecting. He didn't want to screw it up though.

 

[Asa]

She sat back trying to relax as she ate. He wasn't a half bad cook there is a logical reason to enjoy his company more "home cooked" meals. Wow her thoughts seemed a tad selfish as she sighed and just smiled at him.

So whats about all this past that I should know about.

 

[raiguy]

"You and I met when I was 11. Since that day, I've felt the urge to protect you. When I saw you the first time those weeks ago, I felt it again. After that it slowly developed into love. You'd have to ask your dad for specifics. I don't really understand much of it," Ryan said.

He stood up then took her plate, seeing she was finished. He put both of them in the dishwasher, added soap, and started it. He sat down across from her then looked at her. "What would you like to do tonight?" he asked.

 

[Asa]

Normally I would sit here and work with some music or random tv show playing in the background till I fell asleep beyond that I really don't know what to do.

She wondered about his past with her and would question Dad on that later.

 

[raiguy]

"I can leave if you want," Ryan said, knowing that if she needed it, he would let her sort it out. He just hoped she didn't want him to go, but figured it was as much as he had earned. He waited for her answer, trying to stay calm.

 

[Asa]

Stick around if ya want.

She smiled a little and then placed distance going to get her work and curl up on the couch to start trying to sort it out.

See whats on if ya want.

 

[raiguy]

Ryan nodded then sat down on the other end of the couch, giving her enough space to work. He flipped the TV on and turned it onto something interesting, but wasn't really paying attention. He didn't know why, but something else was bothering him now.

 

[Asa]

After a long while she glanced over.

You okay?

 

[raiguy]

Ryan shrugged then smiled. "I'll be fine. I'm just thinking about my past a little bit, which isn't exactly what I need to be doing. I'm just wondering what drew me to you, and still draws me to you. It's one of the only constants I've ever had in my life," he finished, running his hand over his stubble covered face.