Sex life as a parent

[CanuckKitty]

To get to the point - we've been trying to improve our sex life, but I have some... reservations, as a parent.

1. I'm not very quiet. I try, but... if it's good, it's good. Our older child is getting to an age where that could be awkward if he heard.

Did you hear your parents as a child? Rarely, often? Did it bother you, or pique your sexual curiosity? Has this been an issue for you as a parent?

2. I like toys. I've kept a few in my night stand for years, partially hidden but not really. I'm getting more paranoid about this and want to find a more discrete solution, while still keeping them fairy accessible to me.

How do you hide your toys? Do you keep them locked up? Hidden? In a drawer and who cares who finds them?

 

[Easypeter]

My wife asked me to build a box that would fit in our closet with a lock on it . She kept her toys and other things she liked to use sexually . I gladly built her a nice piece so it fit in with our decor . Our kids never knew !

 

[gtnlynn]

I kept our toys under clothes in a chest. My wife can be noisy, but our kids were far enough away that they couldn't hear. If she got loud enough to be a problem and entertain the neighbors, I put a small pillow over her mouth until she calmed down. It wasn't a good fix, but it worked.

 

[StillRain]

I just put my toys in the bottom drawer. I have a fairly open philosophy to all things sex. I want my children to grow up knowing about sex and with a healthy attitude towards it, not that it’s something to be embarrassed about or not discussed with mum should they want to or need to.

They know mum has sex, they just don't leave me alone enough to do so but that’s a whole other story - little cock blockers.

 

[CliodhnaOB]

To get to the point - we've been trying to improve our sex life, but I have some... reservations, as a parent.

1. I'm not very quiet. I try, but... if it's good, it's good. Our older child is getting to an age where that could be awkward if he heard.

Did you hear your parents as a child? Rarely, often? Did it bother you, or pique your sexual curiosity? Has this been an issue for you as a parent?

2. I like toys. I've kept a few in my night stand for years, partially hidden but not really. I'm getting more paranoid about this and want to find a more discrete solution, while still keeping them fairy accessible to me.

How do you hide your toys? Do you keep them locked up? Hidden? In a drawer and who cares who finds them?

I'm not a parent, but I have heard parents at it, still remember first time realised wat it was.
Now I know it's natural and a great sign that they still love eachother.

I hide my toys under my bed in a little gear bag

 

[Michael_Keaton]

I was raised as the child of a single mom and she had only one on-again-off-again boyfriend as I was growing up and he never spent the night (AFAIK). I was with my dad on weekends so things were probably different when I wasn't in the house.

My bedroom was at the very top of the stairs and I often slept with the bedroom door open and one night I heard them having sex in the living room. It was loud and the couch was squeaking in a regular rhythm and there was no doubt what was going on. I was old enough to know the basics of what was happening but young enough to not know the "particulars". At the time it didn't bother me - it was just something that was happening. It didn't scar me for life. Now I realize that my mom (as the saying goes) had "needs" and I'm pleased that she had someone to take care of those needs with.

As to the toys, my wife and I only had a very few. One was a corded vibrator that could easily be explained as something for sore muscles so it was kept in a drawer next to the bed. The second was a dildo that was kept in the top of a closet.

We tried to always be careful about putting the dildo away but also recognized that mistakes happen. We also realized that there were things going on in the bedroom that the kids didn't need to see so we had two rules. 1) This is our room and you do not go in there unless we're there. 2) If one or both of us is in there you knock before you go in. We also had the same #2 rule about the kids rooms. We always knocked before we went inside if they were there but we did reserve the right to go into their rooms if they weren't in there.
Wow, this got long winded! I hope my personal experience helps.

 

[Houstonblonde]

This is why I need a sound proof sex room with finger print entry!!!!!

 

[RedDevilCock]

Grew up pretty sheltered, stumbled upon folks having sex at a Young age. Realized and backed out of the room. (So much for making breakfast for them).
I didn't hide it from my kids. Was very open about it with them didn't want false information and friends being the knowledge basis. They ended up asking lots of questions. After a couple of divorces. I still got calls and tests and conversations with the kids.

Both my ex's weren't the best of people in that regard.

 

[Britva415]

Did you hear your parents as a child?

Yes

Rarely, often?

Rarely

Did it bother you

No

or pique your sexual curiosity?

Only a little

Has this been an issue for you as a parent?

No

How do you hide your toys? Do you keep them locked up? Hidden? In a drawer and who cares who finds them?

They're in a place which is like my private stuff. It's not locked away and it's not exactly "hidden," more like just - if you found those, it was because you were looking where you shouldn't have been because of privacy. My kid is old enough to understand that.

Beyond that, respecting privacy is MUCH more important than whether he is exposed to sex and sex toys or not. As a parent, I am NOT interested in pretending to be a neuter human being. I think that that's far more harmful than just being thoughtfully, appropriately transparent if something is seen or questions are asked.

Look - people used to live 12 to a household, multiple generations, in one room. Everybody knew what was going on between mommy and daddy, and even between nana and grampy. It didn't harm anyone then and it won't in 2025 either.