self-esteem

[human_male]

I've struggled with low self-esteem mostly with how women (or how I believe women) regard me. I can't see anything wrong with me but over the years I came to the conclusion that there must be something seriously wrong with me, that I must be the world's ugliest man. That's just stupid, and I tell myself that's stupid, but those thoughts are still there. You can't just rationalise it away can you?

Fuck Dr. Phil and go see a proper counsellor. Remember that many women are terribly self-conscious about their bodies. I think a lot of people would be a bit worried if their partner spent a long time chatting with people online. I mean you have no idea what they're doing. And just try and focus on the positive things in your life... you have a bf, you have friends (I assume), people like you... why would you not like yourself?

At the very least remember you're not alone. I knew someone who I thought had a hot body, but she was convinced she was fat and ugly. I wish she had believed me all the times I tried to tell her. And I wish she had taken comfort with me instead of all those other blokes *grumble grumble*.

 

[M's girl]

No?

In my not so humble opinion, "being positive" is not equal to "setting yourself up as an easy prey for day time tv snake oil peddlers".

I think Dr. Phil's advice can be okay for life's little grievances. But for people with real, serious problems I'm sure it can be downright harmful.

I was merely commenting on Braincum saying "Think positive thoughts" while starting the post with "Fuck Dr. Phil"..... What I meant to say (jokingly) that the two are somewhat of a contradiction. Never meant to say anything about Dr Phil's skills.

(by the way, at the end of each show there is a disclaimer and he never states people should only listen to him, rather he makes sure guests get the proper help they need)

 

[sirensiren]

I love how people say "love yourself!!" like it's easy. It's not.
It's hard to be objective and see what makes one lovable, especially when one is struggling with depression.

So how do you love yourself? That's the question..

 

[Who27]

I love how people say "love yourself!!" like it's easy. It's not.
It's hard to be objective and see what makes one lovable, especially when one is struggling with depression.

So how do you love yourself? That's the question..

The thing is...once it happens you're like "This is it? This IS easy! How did I not always love myself??"

Some people might compare it to searching for a lightswitch in the dark.

What most people need to realize is everything they need is within themselves. That they have control over their own lives, feelings, thoughts, emotions.

Answers aren't in a book, on the TV, or in someone else's hand...they are within your self and your own frame of mind which everyone has the ability to analyze and adjust for themselves.

 

[SesameStreet]

I Googled Low Self esteem. Lots of articles in here. maybe some of them will help you. Bottom line though you have to learn to accept yourself foe who you are and not worry about what other people think.

http://www.google.com/search?q=low+...ox&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&sourceid=ie7&rlz=1I7DMUS

 

[usana]

On the other hand, if you're a super person already and there are issues in your past

On the other hand, if you're a super person already and there are issues in your past that keep you from recognizing that, you might benefit from some counseling to work those issues out.

 

[south_florida_bicur]

question: why do we (and I say we) spend so much wasted time & energy wondering what other people think of us?


I remember yrs ago I had a true blue friend that I really cared what he thought. It was like I was seeking his permission.

Well, something happened and we weren't talking to one another. His gf came up to me and told me that he was so upset that he actually took off work that day.

Later, I found out that when I cared about what he thought of me, he felt the same way about me.

My point is we are sometimes looking up to them where in actuality they are looking up to us.

Making any sense? Hope so

 

[sexyevilsarah]

i struggle with low self esteem daily so if anyone does have a genuine cure and feel like sharing it let me know

 

[south_florida_bicur]

i struggle with low self esteem daily so if anyone does have a genuine cure and feel like sharing it let me know

I would start by asking "Why do you have low self esteem?"

 

[grayin]

I had a point in my life where I was going through some minor depression and a lot of stress and a book that really helped me out was, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie. It talks a lot about how to deal with stress and other negative factors and how to turn them into a positive self esteem.

I have been going through some crap too. When I saw your post I ordered Stop Worrying and Start Living ,,,, Good Book!!!

Has helped me so far and maybe my marriage will survive.

 

[sugarisnice]

I agree with everyone who suggest Dr. Phil may not be the best "guy" to listen to. There are many other self-help authors who do not conduct therapy sessions for the whole nation to see. Dr. Phil is an opportunist. He once had his own weight loss program complete with snack foods and pills, but that all went away when it was determined it didn't work. I like Dr. Phil, but not on his show. He's a good guest on David Letterman, but lousy on Jay Leno. Just know that you are not alone in feeling insecure. You are not alone in having self body issues. You are not alone in maybe feeling out-of-place. And any guy who doesn't tell you you look perfect is one to dump. A guy who you like should like all of you or else he is someone not to be liked at all.