seeking an editor

[HeyNonnyNonny]

Hi there

I'm a first time writer, at least in this format. I've posted on the author's hangout page, and gained some very useful feedback, as well as a potential editor in Stella_Omega, but she has recommended I find another editor.

Broadly, my story is an encounter between a 16th century French Queen, and her lady in waiting, a Spanish Princess. The princess is comandeered to share the Queen's bed. Action, inevitably, ensues.

I'm relatively happy with the historical elements, and I consider myself broadly competent in the mechanics of writing. However, I have two areas where I think an editor would help:
1. Forming a story. I'm struggling to create a really effective narrative style. For instance, I'm running into lots of problems differentiating between the characters (two "she"s and "her"s), without constantly naming each.
2. The sex. This, let's be honest, is a pretty major issue on Lit. But I'm new to it, and I'm finding it difficult to get the tone just where I want it. Keeping a slightly archaic flavour without sounding parodic or just plain biological is very difficult.

So I'd love some help. Any volunteers?

Nonny

 

[cloudy]

Hi there

I'm a first time writer, at least in this format. I've posted on the author's hangout page, and gained some very useful feedback, as well as a potential editor in Stella_Omega, but she has recommended I find another editor.

Broadly, my story is an encounter between a 16th century French Queen, and her lady in waiting, a Spanish Princess. The princess is comandeered to share the Queen's bed. Action, inevitably, ensues.

I'm relatively happy with the historical elements, and I consider myself broadly competent in the mechanics of writing. However, I have two areas where I think an editor would help:
1. Forming a story. I'm struggling to create a really effective narrative style. For instance, I'm running into lots of problems differentiating between the characters (two "she"s and "her"s), without constantly naming each.
2. The sex. This, let's be honest, is a pretty major issue on Lit. But I'm new to it, and I'm finding it difficult to get the tone just where I want it. Keeping a slightly archaic flavour without sounding parodic or just plain biological is very difficult.

So I'd love some help. Any volunteers?

Nonny

Just a suggestion: I wouldn't worry about writing in an "archaic" style. Most would find that off-putting, I think. You can still write a very effective period piece without it, and with it, sometimes it winds up a little over the top. Where a style like that is useful would maybe be in the Letters & Manuscripts category. Someone writing a letter during that time would, of course, write in that style, but for a story, I think you'd be better off to write it in modern style, except for the dialogue, of course.

Just my $.02.

 

[kbate]

The archaic is good. Write it as you feel it.

The sex - if the narrative is archaic, the sex should follow: the removal of the clothing alone could take a page. It is unnecessary to go biologic in order to have an erotic story. Too many Lit stories (opinion now) fall into the pornographic rather than the erotic. I am a fan of the 'raised knee and come hither look from a scantily clad female' rather than 'spread legs and dripping female anatomy'.

The important thing is that the sex be in line with the character. Nothing is more offputting than a demure queen suddenly being a wanton slut in bed.