MRSassySheDevil
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2019
- Posts
- 204
Didn't know where to post this but figured she was well known here so figured this was the place.
Yesterday was one of the hardest days I have had to deal with, her remains were ready to be picked up and brought home.
I took her Mini that I bought her a couple years ago to replace her Mazda3 that I totaled when a truck pulled out in front of us.
Had the top down and I even used one of the baby buckles she always used. Once I picked her up I sat there for I don't know how long, I could hardly see as I sat there balling like a baby--something I am not used to.
I know some of you have gone thru this, even gotten a few pm's (and thank you) of those who have gone thru this. Besides the hole left its also like starting your life over. Sassy did allot for me, for us--more than she would ever admit.
One thing I did not think about, was the fact its like starting over in life. One thing we used to do was go to Costco--something simple right. Today I went to costco by myself for the first time and I didn't like the feel of it, didn't like being alone but I trucked on. I know there are many more things I will have to do and will try my best to tackle them as I go onward in life.
The letter she wrote me that we found after her passing I have read numerous times because it reminds me she truly loved me, even though my heart hurts badly by some things.
To those who she helped--she so loved doing that. Years ago I had told her she really needed to go to school to be a therapist--she had a knack for it as many of you know..
I know she has built some good friendships here to the point one of them is here now (and has many times) and considered a part of our family.
I was also going to let it out on the negative aspects of her and this place because I am really hurting over it but a smart person had gave me some good advice.
But I sat and read her letter again and it still reminds me she did love me--thats what I want to stay in my heart--not the other stuff that happened...
So today as family and friends come over to mourn her and remember her--hope I don't break down too many times...
Yesterday was one of the hardest days I have had to deal with, her remains were ready to be picked up and brought home.
I took her Mini that I bought her a couple years ago to replace her Mazda3 that I totaled when a truck pulled out in front of us.
Had the top down and I even used one of the baby buckles she always used. Once I picked her up I sat there for I don't know how long, I could hardly see as I sat there balling like a baby--something I am not used to.
I know some of you have gone thru this, even gotten a few pm's (and thank you) of those who have gone thru this. Besides the hole left its also like starting your life over. Sassy did allot for me, for us--more than she would ever admit.
One thing I did not think about, was the fact its like starting over in life. One thing we used to do was go to Costco--something simple right. Today I went to costco by myself for the first time and I didn't like the feel of it, didn't like being alone but I trucked on. I know there are many more things I will have to do and will try my best to tackle them as I go onward in life.
The letter she wrote me that we found after her passing I have read numerous times because it reminds me she truly loved me, even though my heart hurts badly by some things.
To those who she helped--she so loved doing that. Years ago I had told her she really needed to go to school to be a therapist--she had a knack for it as many of you know..
I know she has built some good friendships here to the point one of them is here now (and has many times) and considered a part of our family.
I was also going to let it out on the negative aspects of her and this place because I am really hurting over it but a smart person had gave me some good advice.
But I sat and read her letter again and it still reminds me she did love me--thats what I want to stay in my heart--not the other stuff that happened...
So today as family and friends come over to mourn her and remember her--hope I don't break down too many times...
