request for feedback

[kristydoll]

Hi,

Actually, I am looking for feedback on two different stories. Pick one *grins* and give it to me. "Perfect Little Cum Slut" is in constant edit by me and would like some feedback.

"Janice - Tasty Best Friend" is in the bdsm section though probably could fit elsewhere. Orchid is a recurring character for me..in shorter works..but am wondering if she is worth following through a short story.

Perfect Little Cum Slut http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=60539

Janice - Tasty Best Friend http://literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=59191

Any feedback is appreciated.

thanks,
kristy

 

[the_bragis]

Hello kristydoll,

I chose to read "Janice - Tasty Best Friend". You have a nice easy to read style.

Speaking for my other half, he just adores a good juicy lesbian story, so if you decide to follow through with more 'Orchid', you have him captive.

Two thing struck me about this story.

One, I am sure it's in the wrong category. The bdsm is very light, the lesbian element is stronger.

Two, it seemed to finish before it had started. For me it was just too short. A little like this feedback of mine I guess.

I wish you well with your future writing.

Have a good day,

Alex (fem)

 

[kristydoll]

Thanks Alex for your comments *smiles*

I agree about the wrong category. When I was posting, I was thinking about the "series" and not this specific piece (not sure if I can re-categorize it now).

And yes, it is short. When I wrote the "Orchid" series, it was meant as quick/flash fiction pieces, but have been thinking of turning a few into short stories...or at least her character.

Again, thank you. I appreciate your time.

kristy