Religion and Sex

[michael2956]

I grew up in a conservative, almost fundamentalist, religious environment. Dancing, movies, card playing, and drinking were among the many taboos. Sex was NEVER discussed. Like most horny teenagers, I masturbated often and had my share of backseat handjobs, always followed by waves of guilt.

I've outgrown that, obviously, and I no longer feel guilty about my fetishes and kinks (and I do have a few), but I'm curious about how many other people on Lit share my background. I'd love to hear your stories.

One other thing. I've always been turned on, even as a kid watching cartoons and reading comic books, by seeing people tied up and in distress. I've often wondered how and if my religious upbringing contributed to my interest in BDSM. Any thoughts? Feel free to PM, if you'd like.

 

[MeredithEighty8]

Religious Upbringing is Hard to Shake . . .

Reared as a good Catholic girl with very protective father, ever watchful mother with regular visits to mass and confession.

First intercourse was my senior year at college with long term boyfriend, had only been with three men before meeting current partner, a much, much older man who wanted to and did get me knocked up.

Despite some guilt and a preference for writing LIT porn (a lot of it dealing with incest and non consent), I still regularly go to confession (love confessing sexual stuff, you know what he wanted me to do and what I actually did ) and still consider myself a good Catholic girl.

 

[ryfgirl19]

I was raised Catholic but it was mostly to appease grandparents and, despite being involved in various church activities, my parents didn’t take it very seriously and mostly stopped going to church when us kids were out of the house. We didn’t discuss sex a lot, but there were the appropriate talks about being safe and whatnot, and there was never an expectation placed upon me to save myself for marriage or anything like that.

I’ve never been particularly promiscuous but I haven’t been an angel either. I’ve never felt any guilt or shame over anything sexual that I’ve done or any of my fetishes.

 

[philos]

I just finished reading The Soul of Sex. The two things, faith and sex don’t have to be at odds. Sex, even dirty passionate fucking, can be a celebration of our very existence. Our libido was created by God and can be used to celebrate him.

 

[HampshireBoy]

My only experience has been with a female friend who was brought up by a very religious mother; sex is only permitted between a married couple and even then only to create babies. From what I understand once they had two kids the woman pulled up the drawbridge, unfortunately her husband started sleeping with his secretary. My friend found this out when she was 13, father left about 5 years later and married his secretary. All of which made her mother even more religious and convinced that men are "only after one thing". So my friend was brought up in this environment, getting very horny at times, doing things with men and suffering tremendous guilt.

By the time I met her we were both in our forties, and she was a complete mess over sex. Driven by her religious upbringing to believe it is dirty and, as she wasn't married, she shouldn't indulge but driven by a fairly normal sex drive and need for intimacy to have a string of unsuccessful liasons with men. We actually settled into a friendship that often involved kissing and cuddling and sometimes included sex acts. She loved to lick and suck my cock and enjoyed me using a vibrator on her, or just us masturbating together. This progressed to full sex but to be honest her religious guilt caused her all sorts of problems if this happened.

It is a real shame as her mother's religion has meant that my friend has never been able to have a normal relationship with a man.

 

[srgreene]

I grew up in a conservative, almost fundamentalist, religious environment. Dancing, movies, card playing, and drinking were among the many taboos. Sex was NEVER discussed. Like most horny teenagers, I masturbated often and had my share of backseat handjobs, always followed by waves of guilt.

I've outgrown that, obviously, and I no longer feel guilty about my fetishes and kinks (and I do have a few), but I'm curious about how many other people on Lit share my background. I'd love to hear your stories.

One other thing. I've always been turned on, even as a kid watching cartoons and reading comic books, by seeing people tied up and in distress. I've often wondered how and if my religious upbringing contributed to my interest in BDSM. Any thoughts? Feel free to PM, if you'd like.

I also grew up in a religious household where sex was never discussed. Religion and church have remained a focal point of my life. Did not stop me from being promiscuous in my teens (and later). Now having my father depart this world when I was 13 didn’t help in that regard. But I did not experience the guilt that you describe, although there were times it was painful being “the slut”. I was never into BDSM, and never reveled in scenes of pain.

I guess different people, and the sexes, react to nominally similar situations in quite different ways.

 

[srgreene]

I just finished reading The Soul of Sex. The two things, faith and sex don’t have to be at odds. Sex, even dirty passionate fucking, can be a celebration of our very existence. Our libido was created by God and can be used to celebrate him.

Read the Song of Solomon for a Judeo-Christian celebration of sex!

 

[Scentofawoman]

Raised Hindu in a Christian world.

Be a good girl as long as the parents don’t find out. Don’t let your Christian friends see the Kama Sutra on the shelf before 16

 

[jaF0]

Religion fucks the mind and turns people into blithering idiots.

 

[Jada59]

Interesting notion. My ex husband seemed to think that sex was okay prior to marriage, although very vanilla. After marriage? For procreation only. I was told that his two brothers were the same way. They were Catholic and went to church every week. AFAIK only one brother still goes weekly. The other goes on occasion. My ex only went when his mom begged him.

I was raised Methodist. My parents were big into church until my brother and I had been confirmed. Then they stopped going. Sex was not taboo for me even though my mom protested loudly when my dad tried to touch or kiss her.She hated fancy lingerie. But... She did read smutty books and magazines.

My dad loved lingerie and porn. He made no secret about these things. But he was also into the Gor books. I knew about the other stuff but not the Gor books until I was an adult.

I am somewhat into BDSM. I don't think I would want it as a lifestyle but it can be fun!

 

[philos]

Honestly I don’t think religion is to blame for people’s hangups. At least not Christianity. Yes Christians like many people of other faiths and atheists have hangups but it isn’t really coming from the source material. Most of the New Testament is preaching against greed and selfishness. Very little about sex or sexual prohibitions other than cheating.

 

[jessvluvs]

Religious Thoughts

Merry Christmas.. As a Catholic wife i sit at Church and my mind at times is distracted in ways i feel i am Sinning. Eyes and mind wonder what males are Hung or not. At times even the husbands of my best friends.

 

[thør]

Frank says...

 

[whistler1]

I think this is a very common thing. While the notion of teaching children right from wrong is understood, parents (and religions) often have ideas that certain things (like sex) are absolutely "wrong" - unless done under a very specific set of circumstances.

 

[LadyJS]

.....

 

[magicalmoments]

Merry Christmas.. As a Catholic wife i sit at Church and my mind at times is distracted in ways i feel i am Sinning. Eyes and mind wonder what males are Hung or not. At times even the husbands of my best friends.

My ex shared this interest. She used to send me on missions to try and find out how hung her special interest guys were. I'd do this by going to public toilets and discreetly checking these guys out as best I could and reporting what I saw back to her. As well as the spouses of her friends and assorted friends and work colleagues she also had me check out her brother and her father.

 

[Maeven_quinn]

I was raised in a bay area Episcopal church. My dad served on vestry and everything. I had relatives who were (and still are) conservative Evangelicals.

I attended a high school youth group, and made friends with the Evangelical kids. Their views of gender and sexuality, and such were overtly sexist and overtly heteronomative. I wouldn't have called it that at the time, but I realize now that's what it was. I didn't internalize too much of it, but some of my peers did.

I lost my virginity to my high school boyfriend my senior year. My mom and I had already had a talk about protection and contraceptives, and that helped me be safe. My boyfriend and I already knew that we'd be heading to college in different parts of the state, but we still wanted to be each other's first time. My first experience was positive, even though it hurt to feel that attachment stretch after graduation.

I honestly thought my Evangelical peers would be at least a little happy for me when I told them. I did something that was supposed to be scary, and instead it was wonderful and positive. I got called all kinds of mean names, and soon decided that I didn't need them as friends.


I still go to my family's church at Christmas and when I visit, but am otherwise a secular existentialist and have been since college.

 

[jaF0]

So, church is stupid and Thumpers are assholes. Yeah, we know that.

 

[ArtisticX]

Catholic. We had to confess masturbation. "I touched myself a few times". Certain priests asked questions like, "with your clothes on or off?" I didn't realize at the time, he was probably perving.

https://66.media.tumblr.com/21b03a76d3ca7092f2ce524f7e4c3326/tumblr_mwq8cl5MjW1rdtb8jo1_250.gif

 

[RedJack81]

Honestly I don’t think religion is to blame for people’s hangups. At least not Christianity. Yes Christians like many people of other faiths and atheists have hangups but it isn’t really coming from the source material. Most of the New Testament is preaching against greed and selfishness. Very little about sex or sexual prohibitions other than cheating.

My mother went to a convent, and I have met a number of very strong devout christians and catholics over the years.

To say its isn't to blame for peoples hang ups, I think is a little hopeful. Even if it doesn't say much in the texts, the interpretations and teachings may well say plenty.

I know that the catholic upringing my mother had, has instilled a long running sense of guilt about all sorts of things. 'Naughty' thoughts and acts before marriage have long been frowned upon by many of the religious people I have met.

I think it is changing now, but historically, especially from what I hear about Catholicism, it can cause many many issues.

 

[AngusBridie]

Rock and Roll is my religion and my law..

 

[RedAllan]

I sometimes pray for sex.

 

[Boredozhub]

I went to a Christian Brothers boarding school in outback Australia, all boys school, of about 100... I'm not sure if it screwed me up sexually but it was pretty much all sex all the time, I never got fucked but did just about everything else with the other students and a couple of interactions with the cook and one of the Brothers. I have a very healthy sexual appetite and am pretty much open to anything at least once. I did enjoy going to confession and making shit up to freak out the priest

 

[Hal9000_]

I went to a Christian Brothers boarding school in outback Australia, all boys school, of about 100... I'm not sure if it screwed me up sexually but it was pretty much all sex all the time, I never got fucked but did just about everything else with the other students and a couple of interactions with the cook and one of the Brothers. I have a very healthy sexual appetite and am pretty much open to anything at least once. I did enjoy going to confession and making shit up to freak out the priest

And then you sobered up...and your fantasies got mopped up.

http://www.totalwine.com/media/sys_master/twmmedia/h05/hcf/9800947892254.png

 

[Boredozhub]

And then you sobered up...and your fantasies got mopped up.

http://www.totalwine.com/media/sys_master/twmmedia/h05/hcf/9800947892254.png

How strange that you feel the need to call me a liar? But hey if it makes you feel better about yourself, then you're welcome, happy to help you out