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Regale us, for we want not to be bored. Lives lived...tales from reality.

this whole thread is so incredibly boring i fell asleep half way through. scotty bowers.
 
DC Solar - Making Money from Sunshine (& Tax Credits)

https://www.latimes.com/business/la-fi-berkshire-hathaway-dc-solar-tax-credits-20190604-story.html

Some of the very few assets left to recover value from...
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You wanna be regaled? Here's my story from my senior year in high school.
(All teens mentioned in this account are 18 and have signed consent waivers.)

Linda was the new girl at school and I had just ended a relationship, so we just kind of fell into each others' laps. We had the first two classes of the day together, plus fifth period, and in all three we ended up side by side. It was easy talking to her and we had a good time together at the first dance.
Plus, Linda seemed to be hinting at more to come soon. She initiated hand-holding, wrapped her arm around my waist when we walked, and turned to face me and held the sides of my face, guiding me down to my first kiss with her. She shoved her tongue deep in my mouth.
I thought I was fairly sophisticated for an 18-year-old, having been laid twice, though once was with Judy, the town punch. It was clear that Linda would be a step up for me if we ever got that far.
My Ford Focus was in the shop so Dad let me have the Town Car. It was a cold night in January and the plan was to go to a movie, but Linda hinted that she might have different plans. My imagination was running wild and I had three condoms in my pocket.
My mood was crushed when I picked up Linda. She had on a long dress that went almost to her ankles, an outfit so shapeless she almost looked frumpy. She wore no makeup, not even the little bit she wore to school.
Plus, she was really cool to me to the point of being rude. I talked briefly with her folks while she ignored me, and when we walked out into the bitter cold weather I toyed with the idea of just calling the night off.
I'd left the car idling and the heat on, and she warmed up as soon as I came around to my side and got settled in behind the wheel. By then she'd shrugged out of her coat and unbuttoned the dress from top to bottom. She had on nothing underneath.
"Let's go park," she said with a smile.
She started giving me a blowjob before we'd gone a mile and I was practically naked when we parked at my favorite spot.
I turned to face her and she placed her hands on the side of my head just like she did for our first kiss. This time, though, she leaned back and shoved my face into her shaved pussy. I'd read about eating pussy but nothing compares to the real deal.
Linda was screaming through her third or fourth orgasm when I felt a shudder roll through the car. I had just looked up at her when the window on the passenger side shattered and an arm with a hook on the end where the hand should be reached inside.
The face of a horribly disfigured man appeared. He made a grunting noise, then reached down with his hook and snagged Linda under the jaw. He yanked savagely. Blood was spraying across the interior of the car as Linda kicked wildly. She tried to scream, making a gurgling sound instead, and then she was gone. This man, this monster, had jerked her right through the window.
I stepped outside, naked in the bitter cold, but saw nothing. I hurriedly threw my clothes back on and drove as fast as I could to the nearest police station.
The cops took one look at the interior of the car and immediately started a search. They never found a trace of Linda.
I guess the second worst thing to happen to me that night was having Linda's dad talk to me at the police station.
"Son," the visibly distraught man said. "Why is your shirt on inside out? What were you doing when this happened?"
Under the circumstances, I guess saying "eating your daughter's pussy" was a bit insensitive.
 
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