Question..

[nyxie]

Have you ever noticed that other people who can not understand how a relationship you have with a particular person works.. tend to try to make that realtionship a problem for you.. simply because they do not understand how it works for you?


Example:

a straight forward NSA FWB. (No Strings Attached Friends With Benefits)

I mean a real friend: tells you everything- intimately between yourselves and with others, personally, publicly and individually; who is there for you when shit hits the fan, when you get lucky in all ways and surprises you just because they can; who calls you not only because they know they can get some-some but because they want to actually talk with you.

Intimately you are compatible in every way and there are no complaints. Some times it's a selfish one side or the other fuck and IT is ok and other times they give just because they want to know they are pleasing you.

And they don't run out the door because Orgasm was achieved.

So when you are out in public and you run into one another its never awkward and you are just good friends who are always happy to see one another and even if you happen to be with a "date" you still hug and greet one another like good friends.

Ask how things are, introduce your date/ company and then do your thing.

....

So ..the others people about you.. that have the issues eventually have bitch fests and make problems.
They get upset that you are so friendly in "their" presence.
or freak out because you talk about all aspects of your life with "that person".
Start mentioning that your FWB was out with "so-n-so" this weekend with out you.
Or even better they try to "get with" the FWB (1. to see if the FWB will actually get with them) and 2. to see if it provokes a response from you.

Does anyone else see this pattern?
have this issue?

Am I making any sense at all?


And thank Gods my FWB see's this too and we are open about everything(like I hope all intimate partners would be), because this could be such a social catastrophe if one party did not talk with another.


Please let me know what you feel about this EITHER way..

If I make some sense to you
Or
If you think I am talking about mumbo jumbo.

Thank You

Nyxie

 

[Sensualdreamer]

You make perfect sense to me, tho I've never had a NSA FWB - tho I've had a LOT of close guy friends that I could talk to them about ANYTHING w/o fear of ridicule, or being judged. In my case I've gotten a LOT of flack from my parents who think that when you're married you're somehow incapable of having platonic friends. I've got one guy friend I've known longer than my husband, and after I got married I just cut off all communication - it took me 7 years to re-find him (he had moved about 3 or so times, and had a phone number change as well as an email address change) I swore that I would never do that to another friend.

I naturally have more guy friends than I do have girl friends, well one "girl friend" (using that term loosely) I had, took advantage of my having been injured (closed head trauma) and decided to go through my cell phone and she got a hold of one guy's # (same guy mentioned above) and she started texting/calling him - yeah that was a fun one explaining. She all but tried to get him to stop talking to me, what she didn't realise is that everything she told him, he would talk to me about.

I guess I can only chalk it up to it somehow bothering her that I'm married yet quite capable of having guy friends that I'm close to on a conversational level.