Question for Bi-Fems

[JeanieDraws]

I've been (off and on) bi for more than 20 years and there's something that still puzzles me. When I'm attracted to a guy, I almost always know what about the guy I find attractive (i.e. eyes, smile, build, etc.). But when I'm attracted to another woman, it's difficult, if not impossible, for me to put into words what attracts me.

Now, this isn't a big deal, but I'm just curious if it's only me or if other women have experienced the same thing. So how 'bout it girls, when a woman gets your juices flowing, do you know why? Or to put it another way, can you actually list the physical features you find attractive in a woman?

 

[Wings27]

I've been (off and on) bi for more than 20 years and there's something that still puzzles me. When I'm attracted to a guy, I almost always know what about the guy I find attractive (i.e. eyes, smile, build, etc.). But when I'm attracted to another woman, it's difficult, if not impossible, for me to put into words what attracts me.

Now, this isn't a big deal, but I'm just curious if it's only me or if other women have experienced the same thing. So how 'bout it girls, when a woman gets your juices flowing, do you know why? Or to put it another way, can you actually list the physical features you find attractive in a woman?

I can say with all honesty that my attraction to either sex is very different! I can look at a guy and picture myself straddling him, having amazing sex. However if I'm attracted to a female it's more the feeling that I connect with her, the sex usually comes after that. I think that's just the way I'm hardwired, I view females as softer, sweeter beings, and males as the harder, rougher type. Or maybe I should say that's just the way I prefer them!

 

[JeanieDraws]

"Connecting"

I very much like your point about attraction to another woman being related to connecting on other levels. It fits.

 

[Wings27]

I guess I first figured out that I even liked women when I realized that I was lacking something in my relationships with the male gender. So to me, women represent something else, something above sex.

 

[JeanieDraws]

Higher vs Different?

I'm not sure I would say my relationships with women are on a higher plane than my relationships with men, but I have to agree that they are definitely on a different plane.

 

[hottalyssa]

I can say with all honesty that my attraction to either sex is very different! I can look at a guy and picture myself straddling him, having amazing sex. However if I'm attracted to a female it's more the feeling that I connect with her, the sex usually comes after that. I think that's just the way I'm hardwired, I view females as softer, sweeter beings, and males as the harder, rougher type. Or maybe I should say that's just the way I prefer them!

hi ladies, if i may jump in here. i am not really into guys, but i must agree with wings, that my attraction to women is different. women are on a different than men.with men it is always rough and about them. with women it is softer and about the partner. as i have always said, get into my mind and you can get into my pants. whether it be cyber or rl.now ther are times, esp. in cyber when i am as hott as the next person, but for the most part, that is my rule. women are just .....softr, gentler creatures. thats why i am who i am i guess.

 

[Dreamy87]

Hi, although I have no experience I would like to say that I have to agree too. I like guys, but with girls, there is this click of connection, an understanding, this intimacy is on a very different plane.

 

[zraddish]

I am new here but thought I might chime in.

I've been (off and on) bi for more than 20 years and there's something that still puzzles me. When I'm attracted to a guy, I almost always know what about the guy I find attractive (i.e. eyes, smile, build, etc.). But when I'm attracted to another woman, it's difficult, if not impossible, for me to put into words what attracts me.

Now, this isn't a big deal, but I'm just curious if it's only me or if other women have experienced the same thing. So how 'bout it girls, when a woman gets your juices flowing, do you know why? Or to put it another way, can you actually list the physical features you find attractive in a woman?

Woman are softer, in almost every way to me. I don't have allot of experience with women, more with men. Unless it is straight out lust, the eyes, smile, personality. To me it is the sum of all the parts. I love a quick wit, and I have found that most guys, (not all but most) or I should say straight guys are somewhat slow to catch small things, and details. It is why I get long with gay guys so well. You are right when I am attracted to a guy, I can nail down just what it is. With women the list is often long. As someone else said seduce my mind and you can have my body. Most guys it seems to me will only try for so long to do this. Before giving up unless they have gotten what they want. And that doesn't just have to mean sex. Kind of like foreplay they do it if they have to , where women do it because they love it. Anyway just my 2 cents.

 

[Julie_in_the_north]

Everyone's tastes are different, but most of the views below don't quite ring true in my experience.

With both men and women, I've been attracted by both looks, personality, and that magic 'something'. When I was into men, which I'm not really now, I was drawn sexually to certain kinds of good looks and physiques, and also to charisma, sense of humour, warmth, and intelligence. Plus that indefinable chemistry which bonds two lovers together.

And it's the same with me and women. I don't find looks any less important. Personality is crucial, of course. A woman's natural character has differences from a man's, but there are huge similarities, too. In the case of my partner, I love her. She's funny, bright, quirky, and with an innate goodness which makes my heart melt. Our souls connect very deeply. And, more prosaically, we just get on so well together - our intellects mesh; there's an understanding.

But I also find her very physically attractive, too. She's sexy. I have a lust for her, and her body. When she takes her clothes off, I get wet.

Ultimately, it's that combination of the four factors of personality, physique, and magic - and instrinsic mutual sexual desire. There are several, inter-related reasons why I want and need to have sex with Ruth. Because I love her, and want to express that love physically - through our vaginas, and through orgasm. Because I fancy her. So we have can have fun and pleasure together. And also because I'm sexually drawn to females, as well as, in the past, men - and sex with a woman is just something I naturally need, to find satisfaction.

To change gear for a moment - the original question was about which physical features we find attractive in a woman. Here's my list:

- Beauty. In a facial sense. Pretty, to put it another way. Especially an elegant nose and soft cheeks.

- Eyes. Eyes are so sexy. I like eyes with a sparkle, brightness, and a hint of mischief.

- Her hair. Long, luscious, dark brown hair is just my cup of tea.

- Breasts.

- A fuller figure. Very skinny is a turn-off for me.

- The way she smells.

- Shoulders. Can't quite put this into precise words - but sleek shoulders make me go grrr...

- A cute bum.

 

[ObscurePhantasm]

females..well i think it is just well women are delicious

but seeing as women were specified i think i like them because well women i find attractive are because i like emotional complexity and women are more of an intellectual challenge its more than i'm horny lets have sex lol.

physically i like

-slender ankles/wrists
-the sexy arch of the lower back
-lovely hair/long/curly/redheads
-full lips
-pale skin
-delicate facial features
-VOICE is crucial in my opinion a nice tone is very important
-dont like much makeup natural women
-unique style/grace and charisma as well

basically something that catches my eye

 

[Chiisai_Neko]

I agree that what initially attracts me to a girl is the connection (or potential connection) I may have with her. Of course, there are physical aspects of some women (more often than not, punk, goth and psycho/rockabilly girls) that make me stop and go, "Damn!" but that could just be an appreciation of a certain style as opposed to an attraction to a specific girl.