~qp~'s diary

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

I don't know what I did wrong. She asked for a description of the most painful cunt torturing method. My conclusion was that the most painful (without permanent tissue damage) torture method would be a collection of bullet ants, the most painful known insect bite - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGIZ-zUvotM
Maybe assembled as a dildo instead of a glove.

I've never heard from her again. What did I do wrong?

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

I'm so excited! I just bought my latest geek stuff - the Sohotank ST8 - 16 terabytes of porn - or 400 Blu-Rays. I think this storage space will finally last a whole year before it's full. Yay.

Sometimes I wonder if it's healthy to be a movie collecting geek.

I picked the harddisks, too - 2TB Western Digital Caviar Green drives. We need to protect the environment, right?

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

maybe I should stop using the term "coffee grounds" to describe some co-workers. At least while in a workers' council meeting.

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

I think it's time for a change. Not sure what, when and how and how much, but I feel...unsettled.

So, a very little change for today - a new beard style. The first comment from my wife:"You know, we've been together for 7 years now - and I've never seen your chin before."

Hm, that's true - I always had at least a soul patch. Now I switched to uhm.. souvarov? Anyway, somehow inspired by Jeremy Irons as Lord Vetinari in Colour of Magic. My Bioshock Big Daddy puppet AV was replaced, too.

Now what else is left to change? Maybe a new motto?

Fortiter in re, suaviter in modo!

Now this one would surprise quite some people.


And a new project for 2011 (why wait for New Year's resolutions?) - a "professional" monastery garden - gathering all the (somehow) lost knowledge about herbs and beneficial organisms.
The writings Capitulare de villis vel curtis imperii and Liber de Cultura Hortorum will be my starting point. I found the first one already in the Bibliotheca Augustana. The translation from Latin will take me some time though.

I guess buying some twenty-first century book from amazon might be faster - but...the road is the goal, right?

And as a sidenote, I will never grok that people buy e-books.

I wonder if this diary will still exist in 30 years (hell, a few weeks would be surprising for my fickle nature) and if I read e-books then, too - or if there will still be paper books (or trees).

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

now I know what a "Night of the living dead" is.

It started with some girl who hadn't talked to me for 6 years and who I had met in an online game. If I would remember O. from the game. Uhm, yes, somehow - as much as you remember some GM name from a MMO you haven't played for years. After telling me that the girlfriend from the GM, who I didn't know either, passed away, she decided to take a shower and "be right back". I guess she drowned in the shower, she didn't come back (not that I would have cared much).

One hour later a message from some girl who I had dumped a year ago - because she triggered an insane amount of my warning bells. Now she came back, basically to confirm the suspicions I had and to excuse for her behaviour and to just chat with me in the future. Yeah, sure. I don't think she understands that even for a simple chat I expect a fair share of reality. I accept the Internet as communication channel, I accept that it leads to certain restrictions in interactions, but I don't accept its use as curtain to hide behind. I only deal with real people.


Weird night.

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

I know now for sure that I'm not masochistic. I accidently got an undilated blob of Da Bombs Beyond Insanity hot sauce on my tongue.

No fun. 100k Scoville pure are too much for me.

You remember those old Alien movies, where the acid blood of the alien went right through the metal floors (and everything else in its path)? I think this is how the metal floor felt.

I think I keep CaJohns Magma hot sauce closed for now and go back to the 100% Pain with 40k Scoville. That's still enough for me now.

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

now I need to learn Czech. The good (or bad?) thing is that I don't need to learn it good enough to have phone sex with a Czech girl, but "just" good enough to understand technical documents.

"Třída mající na starosti vytvoření spojení se souborovým systémem a jeho následné ukončení. Také se stará o procházení adresářmi souborového systému."

"Třída pro převedení času z hodnoty typu long na řetězcovou reprezentaci. Čas se uvádí v mikrosekundách. Takže například hodnota 1000000 se převede na řetězec ve tvaru "00:01" ("MM:SS"), nebo například hodnota 7444000000 se převede na řetězec ve tvaru "02:04:04" ("HH:MM:SS"), kde HH jsou hodiny, MM jsou minuty a SS sekundy."

Okay, systému, sekundy, mikrosekundách, minuty and reprezentaci are easy. The rest...well, time (and a dictionary) will tell.

I think I need a raise.

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

I had a very strange dream.

I was walking in a mall (?) and there I met a former friend and his sister. (Background: Seventeen years ago we were friends, born on the same day, celebrated our 18th birthday together. There I had met his sister. Our paths parted then and I haven't seen either of them since about that time.) They looked sad and I finally learned that she is terminal ill.
Anyway, we spent more time together and then I fell in love with her and finally I proposed to her. The dream ended more or less with her beaming smile.

As strange was the fact that it didn't feel like a dream. I've had various kinds of dreams, realistic ones and surreal ones, dreams where you know that you are dreaming, dreams where you dream that you are dreaming etc. It didn't feel like any kind of dream before - it didn't feel realistic per se, but it felt like a real memory of another person. I'm really not superstitious, but this is the best comparison I can come up with.

I thought about triggers the last days that could have resulted in such a dream, but I can't think of one. And I can't get it out of my head (no wonder, try to not picture a pink elephant now). Maybe this diary entry will help...

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

I was watching the Book of Eli. In one scene, a biker gang kills a guy and rapes his girl. Nothing special about the scene, but of course slightly arousing for a pervert like me. But this time it annoyed me to get aroused. "Hey, the director wanted you to feel disgusted right now. It spoils the purpose of the scene if you like this."

My movie brain starts to get more power than my kink brain. Good thing that I'm the director in real life, might spoil some fun otherwise.

 

[Primalex]

Dear diary,

now I want to tie the crotches of two girls together. I'm not that much into bondage itself, but the thought of their naked asses wiggling and the rope going back and forth over their pussy lips amuses me today.

I have a great idea for a new dating app - "Binder" - after Tinder and Grindr, we need one to find people who like to be bound.