Putting the St. back in Valentine

[Couture]

The legendary Saint Valentine out of ancient times takes us back to the 3rd Century after Christ, around 270 A.D. He was a Roman priest or bishop who empathized much with young Roman centurions-to-be who were about to be drafted into military service. When the Roman Empire and legions needed soldiers to protect their ever-expanding territories beyond the Rubicon, Emperor Claudius the Second decreed that nobody could become engaged to be married! The domestic limelight and felicity of the hearth for young and able-bodied Roman boys was not to Claudius the Second's liking. The Holy Emperor had determined that married men made poor soldiers, so he banned marriage altogether from his Roman Empire. But, the loving and kind-hearted Valentine openly defied the Emperor's demand and married off many a young couple clandestinely by quiet candlelight in castle basements and wine cellars. Pope Gelasius also disapproved of Claudius' custom and decreed that a change be made, but to no avail. Since Roman Emperors were considered to be demi-Gods, Valentine's action was considered to be an act of outright treason against il Imperio Romano and defiance of heavenly law. But Valentine continued to marry young couples secretly just the same. When Claudius the Second discovered Valentine's illicit activities, he first tried to convert him to Roman paganism. Ultimately, Valentine was imprisoned and put to death by beheading on the vespers of the Feast of Lupercalia, on February 14, 270 A.D.

Meanwhile the secular humanists have been taking the Saint out of Valentine's day. Now, it's just "Happy Valentine's Day! Let's fuck!"

It's so commercial. Hearts for sale at Wal-mart. Flowers from the florist. Naughty nothings from Victoria's Secret.

But, let's not forget who died so that we could have romantic dinners and hot sex on Feb. 14th. His decapitation. T'is the reason for the season.

 

[entitled]

Actually, the "Hey, it's Valentine's Day, let's fuck" attitude is much closer to the origins of the holiday than most would like to admit.

 

[Couture]

I drew your name little girl. You're mine for the rest of the year! Mwa-ha-ha....

 

[entitled]

I drew your name little girl. You're mine for the rest of the year! Mwa-ha-ha....

hehehe....

Might have to fight the guy with the pointy thing and the one with the sharp thing. They say they got my name too.

 

[Couture]

hehehe....

Might have to fight the guy with the pointy thing and the one with the sharp thing. They say they got my name too.

You should see the size of my pointy thing...

 

[entitled]

You should see the size of my pointy thing...

His pointy thing is over three feet long.

 

[Couture]

His pointy thing is over three feet long.

It's not how long it is, but how you use it.

 

[SEVERUSMAX]

Entitled is right here. It was started as the Christian alternative to Lupercalia, a pagan sex rite that involved a lottery of virgins assigned to lucky men for a year. Still think that this could be a good story.

 

[entitled]

There's a reason i've been going to bed early lately. No, it's not the three foot pointy thing i'm talking about - his other one is shorter and thicker and doesn't detach.

 

[Kev H]

Entitled is right here. It was started as the Christian alternative to Lupercalia, a pagan sex rite that involved a lottery of virgins assigned to lucky men for a year. Still think that this could be a good story.

Mmm just the phrase "pagan sex" gets my blood boiling. Being 3/4 English and 1/4 Swiss, I'd bet at least one of my bloodlines was formed during one of these lil shindigs.

 

[SEVERUSMAX]

Mmm just the phrase "pagan sex" gets my blood boiling. Being 3/4 English and 1/4 Swiss, I'd bet at least one of my bloodlines was formed during one of these lil shindigs.

Probably a lot of ours was. More of us have Roman ancestors than we tend to acknowledge.