Puns

[done_got_old]

I just invented a new dish. I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup.

I call it "Letter Rip!"

 

[AllIsGood]

I just invented a new dish. I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup.

I call it "Letter Rip!"

Love it

 

[AllIsGood]

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic.

 

[AllIsGood]

The best way to communicate with fish is to drop them a line.

 

[Eisranac]

I just invented a new dish. I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup.

I call it "Letter Rip!"

...so will you call it X Lax?

I am hoping that what comes out is not in the form of Alpha Bits. That would be a cereal case of diarrhea.

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic.

Does that mean that I do not own or drive a Lexus which is considered a lemon?

The best way to communicate with fish is to drop them a line.

Fish usually get hooked on that, whether or not they try to worm their way out of that one.

 

[done_got_old]

What do you call the medical condition where your feet go to sleep? Coma-toes.

 

[Jenaus]

Professionalize? That's a pro-verb.

 

[Eisranac]

What do you call the medical condition where your feet go to sleep? Coma-toes.

That is the time when you need to call a toe truck instead of an ambulance.

Professionalize? That's a pro-verb.

That is not what I read in that article about adjectives - or is that an adjective about articles?

 

[AllIsGood]

Q: Which country’s capital is the fastest growing?
A: Ireland’s. Every year it’s Dublin.

 

[done_got_old]

Q: Which country’s capital is the fastest growing?
A: Ireland’s. Every year it’s Dublin.

 

[AllIsGood]

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything."

 

[done_got_old]

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything."

You're on a roll!

 

[AllIsGood]

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

 

[AllIsGood]

Q: What do you call a cow with two legs?
A: Lean beef.

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground beef.

 

[done_got_old]

What exercises does a Zombie do? Deadlifts.

 

[AllIsGood]

Did you hear about the depressed plumber? He's been going through a lot of shit.

 

[done_got_old]

Did you hear about the depressed plumber? He's been going through a lot of shit.

No shit?

 

[AllIsGood]

No shit?

A lot of shit!

----------------------------

What is the best thing about living in Switzerland?
Well, the flag is a big plus!

 

[Eisranac]

Q: Which country’s capital is the fastest growing?
A: Ireland’s. Every year it’s Dublin.

Irish you would have given more statistics.

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything."

You're on a roll!

To be frank, I am not sure that one quite cut the mustard.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

How were you able to stage that one?

Q: What do you call a cow with two legs?
A: Lean beef.

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground beef.

...and when you leave a bovine a gratuity, is that known as cow tipping?

What exercises does a Zombie do? Deadlifts.

I would not Tell Her No when She’s Not There, but it is the Time of the Season for Zombies to play around.

Did you hear about the depressed plumber? He's been going through a lot of shit.

...and if I had said that instead, I would be told to pipe down.

 

[Eisranac]

Now I know why she is so sweet: because she revealed to me that she is a Sundae School teacher.

I will not fudge when I say that that was the cherry on top for me. In fact, ice cream it out to anyone within hearing distance.

 

[AllIsGood]

Sign at the swamp:

Frog parking only. All others will be toad.

 

[AllIsGood]

Did you hear the Energizer Bunny was arrested? He was charged with battery.

 

[done_got_old]

After winter, the trees are relieved.

 

[AllIsGood]

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest?
A: An investigator

 

[AllIsGood]

For Star Wars fans...

What's for dinner?
Wookie steak

How is it?
A little Chewy!