Problem

[homunculus]

I don't think I posted this correctly the first time, so I'll gry again. Here's the problem. I'm at work and bored, so since the computer is on wander over to sites with sexy photos or words or both. Half an hour later I'm still browsing that stuff. Even after I swithc it off I'm liable to go back later in the day, or at night. Also, x-rated videos are so easy to rent... And one feeds into the other so I feel that I'm in a loop and I can't quite get out or control it. Yes, it's fun or stimulating, but distracting. I wouldn't say it is addicting but is a difficult compulsion to stop. So, just saying 'enjoy' or 'turn it off, do something else' isn't the answer.

 

[phoenix1224]

You may be a sex addict...

The misconception is that sex addicts only compulsively engage in sex, but not all sex addicts actually engage in sex... Many DO compulsively view porn...

But, if it's not interfering with other aspects of your life, I wouldn't worry about it... If it IS... there are twelve step groups that could help you...

Call your local rehab facility... They may be able to refer you...

 

[oo0_boo_0oo]

as soon as the eyesight starts to fail turn it all off

 

[homunculus]

"But, if it's not interfering with other aspects of your life, I wouldn't worry about it..."

Freud's definition of emotional health was that if an adult was able to have sex and hold a job he or she was ok. I'm more than ok by that criterion, and I don't believe myself, yet believe myself, addicted. But I am stuck. I wonder how many naked lady photos men who frequent Lit view per day... I wonder how often they view pornographic downloads or videos in a week or month. We're in a new world and it's a bit weird in this respect.

 

[millieteases]

Stay off the porn at work! Do you want to get fired? Unless you're working for some kind of an adult entertainment company I doubt that your boss would be very amused to find you checking out some porn site while you're on his nickel. And somebody else may find it offensive and then you get to deal with sexual harassment issues.

If you can't control it get some help from the mental health folks.

Lots of folks enjoy looking at porn. Some do it most days, some only occassionally. My spouse does it the three or four nights a week I'm not home. I tend to cruise Lit and write stories at the times he's not here. When we're together, all bets are off. We're into each other more than porn. Most folks, if they've got something else more important to do - like your job! - can walk away from it and not be troubled by the compulsion to return to it.

And then there's always the way good Catholic children were taught to deal with "urges." Physical Activity - go for a walk, to the gym, for a bike ride, a jog, play tennis, softball, basketball, whatever. Read some "uplifting" literature. The Bible, Torah, Koran, Bhagavad Gita, whatever. Shakespeare. Twain. Joyce. Paint, sculpt, build. Clean house. Go on a date. Write. Do charity work. In short, distract yourself.

At work, work. At home, play. If you're having a hard time keeping it separate, get some help.

 

[homunculus]

Thanks, Millie, for the thoughtful response. Yes, I'm going to make it step one to avoid those sites at work. The temptation derives from the fact that my work computer is super fast and I have no supervision...but it will be good discipline for me to stick to work and nothing but. It's not as if I don't have lots and lots to do there...
I wish the nuns I encountered way back when were as constructive as you. When I was kid they were more into thinking about the Passion--not a very effective antidote to passion...
If your husband is watching porn 3 or 4 nights a week then I don't feel so...alone or odd or something. Maybe it's just another indulgence. It would be nice to know what other people did, and thought of it...

 

[Lust Engine]

Millie hit the nail on the head with the not looking at porn at work deal.

You might be unsupervised now but what happens if you're busted? Loss of job? Loss of high speed internet usage at work? Think about the embarrassment & stigma of being caught at work.

It's not worth it!

Bring it home & indulge there!

 

[homunculus]

It was stuff I was looking at on the web, not magazines or the like that I brought to work. But you're right. No more.