powerplay/roleplay

[Ass_tronaut_T]

Over the times I have found that quite a few of us really enjoy some (playfull) domination and submission..
I DID NOT post this on the BDSM board because what I mean is not really "classic" BDSM (I know, I know... there are a million variations!! I just have to simplify to make it a little clearer what I mean)
Let's take me as an example. I don't see myself as a Dom in the usual terminology (and as the counterpart of a slave or sub) but still I really enjoy to act dominant and sometimes even rough in bed (or elsewhere). I even like to give a spanking once in a while although I'll leave this out as it may cross the line to BDSM in the sense I mentioned above.

Still there are many things that turn me incredibly on that are (or can be!) dominant in their nature. As like dirty talking, assfucking, facials, getting my balls licked... Even a "normal" rough fuck. (and a few things I may mention later...)
I think it's the idea and the visuals that stimulate me most.

Em.. ok, so far my (a little confused) thoughts..

How do you feel about this?
Is it just here, or is sexual powerplay becoming more popular in general?

 

[psyche]

I love someone who is dominant in bed. My lover completely contols me in bed and it's a total turn on for me. He knows that as soon as I walk in the door, I want him. He makes me wait until he's ready. And then when he starts, he works me into a frenzy of desire for him, while he is seemingly in complete control of his emotions. He could walk away and leave me on the bed without ever taking me at all........This is the hottest sexual relationship that I have ever been in.

 

[BlueSugar]

I enjoy this alot too. I would so so so much rather have an intense sexual fucking in bed then a sweet little vanilla most of the time. The more kinky and playful and dominant he/they are the wetter I am, I've cum from a good spanking and other power play ideas w/o him even getting near my cunt.

 

[Ass_tronaut_T]

The more kinky and playful and dominant he/they are the wetter I am, I've cum from a good spanking and other power play ideas w/o him even getting near my cunt.

Reminds me of an ex-gf I had. She "hated" me for making her all wet and squirming just by whispering dirty thoughts into her ear while we were somewhere in public...
Telling her what I will do to her later, and that I know how wet she is getting now...

She was also the first where I discovered how hot it is to get her so worked up that SHE would beg to suck my cock. Holding her head tight with her hair around my fist, teasing her by slapping my cock on her tongue and face...

 

[BlueSugar]

hearing that makes me squirm. I'm the same way, i like to be told (where ever, when ever) what he wants with my body... espically during or right before the acts, waking up in the morning or going to bed at night telling each other what dirty day/dream we had ... writing little clips of sexual things and leaving them in each others cars if we leave for work/classes at different times.
Espically also, during power play, and i'm on my knees recieving a class A spanking and hes telling me how wet my thighs are and just talking dirty ... during oral what/where/how he wants it... and I inturn tell him the same when the roles/situations are switched.

and i get agressive or extremely submissive when he denys me the pleasure of giving him oral.

 

[Psia]

I think it's great that you like to play with power in bed. I really enjoy it as well. I don't consider myself a part of the BDSM "scene" but my husband and I have the cuffs and cat of nine tails. Sometimes absolutely nothing is hotter than being taken and not being in control.
Yum.
Psia

 

[DirtyJJ]

This thread is really what has been on my mind lately - and like you said I am not sure I am into "classic" BDSM but I love the idea of being controlled or dominated a little, or even just being talked dirty to or having rough, wild sex. My husband is caring and considerate in bed, and is pretty open minded sexually, but lately I feel he is too passive and I want him to rough me up a little or just screw me like a slut! I have to figure out how to get this across to him. I think it would add a lot to our sex life.

I think one reason I feel this way is that there is a guy at work that I am so hot for... he is pretty raunchy and we talk about sex a lot and I imagine he would be wild and nasty in bed. I'd love for him to dominate me, control me, and tell me what to do while talking very dirty to me. That's what I am looking for right now. These thoughts are a bit new to me but very exciting!

Ass_T: I love your description of whispering dirty thoughts in your gf's ear and holding her head tight while teasing her with your cock...

 

[Ass_tronaut_T]

I think I don't consider myself a part of the BDSM "scene" but my husband and I have the cuffs and cat of nine tails. Sometimes absolutely nothing is hotter than being taken and not being in control.
Yum.
Psia

I know exactly what mean.. Well from my perspective it's to let the inhibitions go and unleash the sexual "beast".. just taking her, filling her up, showing her 'who's boss'...
This can be a real "rush"that *sometimes* even scares me a little..

btw: The cat of nine tails sounds like fun.. It's breakfast time where I live now and my cafe latte is accompanied (spelling? sorry, no native speaker here..) by a nice image of a girls ass with some red stripes while she is on her elbows... bend over the bed ... Mmmmm... breakfast tastes even better now..

T.

 

[Ass_tronaut_T]

This thread is really what has been on my mind lately - and like you said I am not sure I am into "classic" BDSM but I love the idea of being controlled or dominated a little, or even just being talked dirty to or having rough, wild sex. My husband is caring and considerate in bed, and is pretty open minded sexually, but lately I feel he is too passive and I want him to rough me up a little or just screw me like a slut! I have to figure out how to get this across to him. I think it would add a lot to our sex life.

Well, welcome to the "non-classic" BDSM-thread then "Dirty" (the name is a good start, I'd say..)...lol

As for your husband: I can be VERY caring, gentle and considerate in bed - still love to (have to?) use a women like a whore once in a while.. So what I want to say is: chances are, it's "in him" as well.. He might even fantasize about it like you do. Many men have problems though to see that 'whore' in their loved gf or wives. In their imagination a women can be either one or the other - they might need to realise that the very best you can get is a loved partner and strong women that turns into a fuck and suck-slut in bed...

Talk to him! maybe not giving him instructions what to do but just bring the subject up.. You might even try a little "shock therapy": ask him if he fantasizes about screwing a women (you?) like a slut.. He will probably blush ...lol.. not being sure what answer you expect him to give - but it may break the ice.. And a little "I like the idea.." from your side may start a firework of imaginations in him..

With women I have found out, that surprisingly many like it "a little rough" once in a while.. A good way to 'test it', can be pushing her head down a little (not too rough, not too gentle) telling her to "lick my balls" - can always be "excused" as something that happens in the heat of the moment, but it pushes the button if it's there...lol.. Actually I have experienced gushing wetness much more often than confused looks...
"Look me in the eyes when you suck me!" (said with a strong voice) is another good "starter".....
I actually think we tend to find partners that fit our inner desires - EVEN if we don't admit it or don't even know about these desires yet..

I think one reason I feel this way is that there is a guy at work that I am so hot for... he is pretty raunchy and we talk about sex a lot and I imagine he would be wild and nasty in bed. I'd love for him to dominate me, control me, and tell me what to do while talking very dirty to me. That's what I am looking for right now. These thoughts are a bit new to me but very exciting!

Maybe he "smells" it...lol I've had a similar situation once. Over the times I was more and more convinced that she was craving for a good hard fucking.. hair pulled back and holes filled. It never happened anything as we were both in a relationship - but I got bolder day by day loving it that I could almost see her squirm on her seat whenever we talked about sex.. So I talked a little more detailed and dirty every time - enjoying that it didn't repulse her but that I could almost see a wet spot on her seat instead...lol

I hope you'll get what you want soon, good luck!

T.

 

[Ass_tronaut_T]

the ideas of cuffs and dirty talking motivated me so much that I created this perfect one for breakfast:

 

[DirtyJJ]

Thanks for your response A_T - I think you are right that it's in my husband to be a little more wild in bed, and we just need to have some fun coaxing it out. And I will continue to have fun at work too - the experience you describe is very similar to mine. He knows he turns me on when we talk dirty. And I love it because it is something that is often quite taboo at work.

Needless to say all of this has fueled some great stories - my first one is pending and I have others in the works. I love this site - in fact maybe a bit too much as I have spent too much time on it this weekend.

 

[Derya]

Understand completely

I understand where you're coming from Ass_tronaut_T. I think I feel very similiarly inclined to what you described, but for me I am intensely turned on by the submissive side of roleplay/powerplay. I too, although reading the BDSM threads pretty regular, do not generally feel like I have much to respond to in that genre because I don't perceive it as a lifestyle. Kind of a "feels like it fits, but it doesn't fit" kind of thing. It's not an approach I need or want everytime I'm with a lover, but it is my most prevalent fantasy regarding self pleasure because I find it so incredibly stimulating (LOL and I think you need all the stimulation you can get when you're on your own versus when you have a partner to help things along )

I immensely enjoy fantasies of such a nature and in one relationship I've had the chance to experience just a touch of such roleplay and mild bondage and it was wonderful and the sexually intensity between my partner and I in that relationship was amazing. Unfortunately for many reasons that relationship was somewhat short lived. I would love the chance to be involved with someone where I/we could more fully explore such and be in a comfort zone for fully playing with such fantasies. There's another friend that I came close to sexual play with and we talked a lot about sex and I know we would have just rolled with this. I kind of regret we never experimented further. Some of what we talked about and played out without even ever getting to anything truly intimate was such a turn on that I still think about it and him pretty often when I masturbate. Oh my, feelings of regret LOL.

Regarding whether sexual powerplay is becoming more popular in general? I haven't a clue. I know it's always been a part of my fantasy world from day one; who knows why? If it is a predominant turn on among my peers/family/friends is doesn't appear so...I in the past have tried to initiate conversations with friends and with lovers to kind of feel out discussions and see if others feel the same as I and haven't found that much similiar thought. Maybe people are just hesitant to open up on it, just like I can be. Since exploring online discussions etc. I have been literally awakened to just how many people think similiarly and enjoy similiar fantasies and sexual play. It has been great to learn of more of that and to find some ways to discuss it. Maybe the anonymity that online can offer adds to the openness somewhat as well as discussions targeted to specific topics (example: Lit is a adult, sexual fantasy and discussion site); I think it helps me be more candid, or I should say at least more candid more quickly in such situations.

 

[Etoile]

the ideas of cuffs and dirty talking motivated me so much that I created this perfect one for breakfast:

I daresay I'm confused.

 

[ropeman64]

Excellent topic and one that I find as a newbie is the hardest to understand.

In the physical arena; sex, it is fairly easy for me to understand power control. There are times when I like to be in control. I like to normally incorporate both role playing, some form of bondage and long periods of stimulation into the act. And there are times when I like to give up control. Let my partner play with me, tease me.

But I am struggling with what I see as the traditional "lifestyle" version of power control and how players receive pleasure / satisfaction from non physical stimulus.

This may be because all I have known is the physical side. Even my love of bondage is in a physical sense. The visual sight of a women in bondage is erotic. And placing a women in bondage is exciting because of the visual image I will see when done.

 

[warrior queen]

i love being 'dominated' by my man - love the whole 'loss of power/control' that comes with being taken his way...

like being told what to do, how to do it, being ordered to comply....

and i adore being 'used' and just generally fucked any way he wants - no input re: position etc. from me.

sometimes, a lady gets tired of being a lady, and just wants to be a whore - rough, raunchy, penetrating fucking

oh, and keep going till you're satisfied, not me!

 

[sasha_fem22]

It's a weird thing but I've found that most guys aren't into it............not as role-playing cyber anyways.

 

[psyche]

I drive up to visit him, walk in the door and he's standing there. At the sight of him my pussy is liquid and he hasn't even touched me yet. I want him so badly that the ache is unbearable, he knows it and he takes his time. His lips are on my neck, he squeezes my ass, runs his hand over my side and takes my breast in his hand. My head is swimming, I can hardly stand, I hold on to him for support. I try to press myself against his cock, I want to feel his hardness, he pushes me away. He kisses me, holds me close and reaches under my skirt, I moan with pleasure as he pushes my thong aside and dips his finger into my wetness. His finger slides along, back and forth, from my pussy to my clit, wet, slick with my juices, I cum, clinging to him, he pushes his finger into my pussy and I cum again and again. I reach for his cock, he pushes my hand away......and walks me down the hallway. In a fog, I take my jewelry off, he unzips my skirt and I step out of it. Then he pushes me to the bed, face down, moves my thong to one side, and in one stroke buries his cock in my pussy.......I cum so hard that I squirt all over him, the bed and the carpeting........

He's only just started..........