Post your comments to Anonymous

[johnnieblue44]

Dear Anonymous, you’re a spineless pussy. Have the gonads to write something yourself, Hemingway. You sit in the shadows and comment like a lonely, pathetic weasel. Lick my bunghole, dick fist. Next?

 

[Damoiselle]

Dear Anonymous,

It's weird that you assumed my engaged, 22 year old protagonist is a virgin.

It's weird.

 

[Emmeline]

Dear Anonymous,

I'm glad you took the time to tell me my writing was so bad I should just go kill myself. Great constructive criticism.

 

[NotWise]

Dear Anonymous,

Thanks guy, I'm glad you liked it. I liked it, too.

 

[Blind_Justice]

I have no beef with Mr. or Mrs. Anon.

I mean, everyone is entitled to an opinion and those few anons who blessed me with their commenrs have been mostly kind.

For those few who try to poke holes in my plots though: Never argue plot with someone who keeps notes as obsessively as I do. I know exactly why each character does what they do and where it all culminates. Claiming the alignment shift of Celeste in "Mud and Magic 9" onwards was pulled out of my ass even when it was planned from chapter two shows you're NOT PAYING ATTENTION.

Phew. I needed that.

 

[BiscuitHammer]

Dear Anonymous

No, you will never know how my characters are supposed to act better than I do. Endless howls of 'Alexa would never...' aren't going to change that.

PS- you will NEVER be better than me at writing temporal/time travel bafflegab. You will never know anyone better at it than me. I work in scifi TV. Go home, peasant.

That felt good. I liked that. Thank you to the OP.

 

[SimonDoom]

What Anonymous said:

Anonymous5 months ago
Bad Very Bad
Regardless of what some these people say this was an extremely bad story im not going to tell you what i think you want to hear to try and be nice and not hurt your feelings my 5 Year old niece can write a better story then this it was so bad i hope this was your only story cause i tell you if not you should stop posting them before you ruin this site i wished i was blind and couldn't read that's how bad it is tell you what you want to learn to write an actual decent story take writing classes about 100 times a week no scratch that not even that will help you write a decent story do us all a favor and quit just completely forget how to write.


My belated reply:

Regardless of what you say this was a very bad comment im not going to say it was good in part it wasn't it was just bad but maybe if you went to school for a long long time and learned something about how to read stories and how to punctuate and avoid run on sentences and how to sound like your education didnt end after kindergarten when you were throwing pink balls to your friends and the teacher gave you a cookee after ressess you might learn somethign and be able to make an intelligent comment but no scratch that that will never happen so how about instaed you just shut the fuck up.

 

[SimonDoom]

Johnnieblue44, thank you, sir, for starting this thread.

That was very cathartic.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Dear Anonymous,

Thanks for the encouragement. Most of you are lovely.

 

[Enchantment_of_Nyx]

Dear Anonymous,

I'm terribly sorry you had to read through the first four chapters the story to decide it was awful. It must have been a terrible burden. I think it's wise that you are considering refraining from reading the next chapter.

Thank you again for giving me so many chances to catch your interest, but the investment doesn't seem to be paying off. Happy reading elsewhere! (Please do make it elsewhere.)

 

[ElectricBlue]

I must be doing something wrong, or write in completely different categories, because I rarely get crapola anon comments. I subscribe to the thesis, therefore, that if anons are repeatedly offering up the same comments, maybe it's time to pay attention .

 

[AlinaX]

One of my favourite Anons:

Anon.: You don't need a board game to become a.bimbo. Reading this story will do the trick. I don't know what happened. Your other stories are not bad. But I could feel brain cells dying when reading this.

Me: Thank you all, for comments sweet and sour... I had fun writing this - and who needs brain cells anyway.

 

[oggbashan]

Dear anonymous, thank you or pointing out, politely, that the heroine changed hair colour during the story, while liking the whole story.

Women do that, particularly as it is several years later but it had been going to be a part of the plot. She was pretending to be blonde to match her forged and cloned immigration papers which is why she had to keep touching up her roots and wore head scarves to cover her hair much of the time. Changing to her natural brown hair colour was a sign of her settled status on a legitimate visa.

But I left all that out of the completed story except the different hair colour. Thanks for pointing out my omission and for being reasonable about it.

 

[lovecraft68]

Dear Anonymous,

Its too bad you get a bad rep, by and large most anon comments are positive, some even providing thoughtful critique, and its a shame I don't get to recognize you when you comment on many of my stories because you don't have a name I can associate you with.

To the small, but obnoxious faction of anon that spews hate. I pity you, your life must be pretty sad if it makes you feel good to abuse people's hard work and them personally to make yourself feel better.

On the occasions I've made you feel better, you're welcome, you need me more than I need you.

To LW anonymous? My wish is that someday you slip and say one of the hateful abusive things you type from the safety of your keyboard to someone in real life and get the beating you deserve.

Sincerely,
Lovecraft68

 

[Handley_Page]

Dear Author/s,
Please be advised that not all of we "Anon" commenters are ignorant critics.
Some of us might find a genuine (if minor) mistake and feel the need to draw it to your attention. Apart from anything else, it does show that we are, or were, paying attention to the tale.
And, faced with the talent demonstrated in the text, perhaps some 'Anons' feel a trifle awed and feel the need to hide our faces, but demonstrate some support, as from the back row of the auditorium clapping quietly after the symphony.

 

[oggbashan]

Dear Anon who signs himself HP - thank you for your years of positive comments.

 

[Zeb_Carter]

Dear Anon, Even though I have warned you upfront, you still read the story and leave comments calling me a cuck. First, I wish you understood what fiction is. Second, I'm so sorry your wife cheated on you and made you her cuck. Not really. You probably deserved it. Most assholes do. Third, I am three days older than dirt and have yet to catch any STDs, so even if I did now, I would die of natural causes before the STDs had a chance to kill me. I'm really sorry your dick fell off though. Not really.

Just two more words... Fuck You.

 

[SolarRay]

Dear Author/s,
Please be advised that not all of we "Anon" commenters are ignorant critics.
Some of us might find a genuine (if minor) mistake and feel the need to draw it to your attention. Apart from anything else, it does show that we are, or were, paying attention to the tale.
And, faced with the talent demonstrated in the text, perhaps some 'Anons' feel a trifle awed and feel the need to hide our faces, but demonstrate some support, as from the back row of the auditorium clapping quietly after the symphony.

True -- though I'm content with assuming johnnieblue44 was referring specifically to the nastier Anons rather than ones attempting to be helpful.
I think the issue with at least some of the Anon commenters of the type you describe (i.e. who find "a genuine (if minor) mistake") is with the way they choose to offer feedback. If they liked a story but had one valid issue with it, they don't necessarily deliver that information in a way that acknowledges any such "awe" or "talent demonstrated" that you mention. Instead, they'll often point out the issue with apparent glee that they found your mistake, declare to everyone else they they deemed it worthy of voting down the score because of it, leave no impression other than the idea that this one so-called minor thing ruined their entire enjoyment of the story, etc. If they really do respect the author, a simple way to prevent such a comment from coming off as unintentionally nasty is to always leave an impression of the overall story, even if the central intent is to address a specific mistake therein. This way they're coming off as more credible, courteous, and offering some context for their point.

 

[Vix_Giovanni]

Dear Anon type-1,
How I wish you weren’t anon I would love to have shared a hug you when you cried for my characters and shared a laugh when they irritated you! Thank you from the bottom of my heart

Dear Anon type-2,
Clapback .

 

[SimonDoom]

Dear Author/s,
Please be advised that not all of we "Anon" commenters are ignorant critics.
Some of us might find a genuine (if minor) mistake and feel the need to draw it to your attention. Apart from anything else, it does show that we are, or were, paying attention to the tale.
And, faced with the talent demonstrated in the text, perhaps some 'Anons' feel a trifle awed and feel the need to hide our faces, but demonstrate some support, as from the back row of the auditorium clapping quietly after the symphony.

This is true. As SolarRay said, I took johnnieblue44's thread to be an invitation to respond to specifically nasty comments rather than to Anonymous generally. I'm glad to get anonymous comments; most of them are very nice. I thought this particular one deserved a cheeky in-kind reply.

 

[MelissaBaby]

Dear anonymous,

I get plenty of five stars without trading tit pics for them, but thank you for the offer.

 

[SimonDoom]

Dear anonymous,

I get plenty of five stars without trading tit pics for them, but thank you for the offer.

That's beautiful. Mic drop time.

I suppose it doesn't need to be said that nobody asks me for tit pics.

 

[ElectricBlue]

That's beautiful. Mic drop time.

I suppose it doesn't need to be said that nobody asks me for tit pics.

"Now there's an idea," said the penguin. "Makes a change from fish."

 

[vanmyers86]

Dear Anon type-1,
How I wish you weren’t anon I would love to have shared a hug you when you cried for my characters and shared a laugh when they irritated you! Thank you from the bottom of my heart

Dear Anon type-2,
Clapback .

This.

Also, dear Anon, it's hard to answer your questions when you don't give me a way to send you a message.

 

[ChadAlpha]

Dear Anon type-1,
How I wish you weren’t anon I would love to have shared a hug you when you cried for my characters and shared a laugh when they irritated you! Thank you from the bottom of my heart

Dear Anon type-2,
Clapback .

Daaaamn, Vix! Make ‘em bow down to the queen, periodt!

I’m an anonymous commenter a lot (the HP type, not the type Vix just read to filth). What I don’t understand is writers and readers having a conversation or fight through the comments section... to me, that seems like Flintstone-era Twitter. If I leave a comment, I’m not going back days later to see what the author’s response is! If I want to dialogue, I just send an email or PM.