Plot bunny, or just sickening?

[SweetWitch]

We have here a tale of two young men named Ryan. They lived in the same small town, went to the same schools, ate at the same restaurants and had some of the same friends. Only problem is, they hated each other.

It's a dark night. Both men, for some reason, are in the same truck--with a third man. There's an accident--a roll-over that is by all accounts quite horrific. One of the Ryans is dead. The other Ryan and his friend are uninjured.

Rumor has it, though, that the accident was faked. That Ryan number two and his friend beat Ryan number one to death, then wrecked the truck and put the body in it. As the story goes, they spent two hours cleaning up the murder scene and getting their stories straight before Ryan number two called his daddy, who just happens to be one of the small town's police officers.

Enter the sheriff. He goes to great pains to keep all the details under wraps--very unusual for a simple accident in a small town.

But what of Ryan number one's parents? An hour after the boy was pronounced dead, they finally send a deputy to the father's house. When he arrives at the hospital to find only the coroner there, he demands to speak to the sheriff. Then he calls the state police to demand they take over jurisdiction after the sheriff refuses to give any straight answers.

In a small town, the truth has a way of coming out. Phone calls started coming in. The father is given information that could only have come from the people in the vehicle at the time of said "accident", such as who was actually driving the truck. The father questions why these men were in his son's pickup in the first place--after all, they were enemies.

http://www.myjournalcourier.com/news/questions-24113-unanswered-one.html

So...plot bunny or just plain sick?

 

[Stella_Omega]

Both.
It wouldn't be a happy fun-fun story of course, but it could be a very good story.

 

[Liar]

Sounds like a premise for a CSI episode.

 

[TxRad]

Sounds like a premise for a CSI episode.

Just what i was thinking.

Then it ends up suicide, with the dead guy trying to pin it on his worst enemy.

 

[Boota]

Fairly similar to what happened to my cousin this past August. Not an intentional murder, but a police cover-up to protect the sheriff's nephew who was driving drunk when she was killed. In their case, like my cousin's, I hope the state police take over and rack them all up.

If only we could get the state police to look into ours. They don't want to rock the boat with the local PD's they deal with.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

IMO, I think Karin Slaughter has set the parameters here.

Given the suspicious death, you have to weave a web around the death, linking it to people in the community, making things a bit opaque, leaving you to reveal things at the end.

What you propose here is a bit flat, sorry.

 

[SweetWitch]

I have an urge to follow this one to the end and write it. There's a lot that's not being told and a lot that's innuendo. Both families have been at odds for years and neither the victim or the other two men involved are angels. Their entire community is split over this thing with a lot of rage on both sides of the fence.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

In the Old Days it was common for law enforcement to let inmates murder other inmates by sheet hangings, or to stage car wrecks...brain the victim with a tire iron then roll his car over a few times. With the sheet hangings you just sit on the guy's shoulders and legs til he strangles.

 

[SweetWitch]

IMO, I think Karin Slaughter has set the parameters here.

Given the suspicious death, you have to weave a web around the death, linking it to people in the community, making things a bit opaque, leaving you to reveal things at the end.

What you propose here is a bit flat, sorry.

It's not a proposal. It's real life--or death, as the case may be. It's a sad story of a life-long feud between two boys in the same small town. There's a police cover-up, lies, and a father who can't get a straight answer. The story doesn't end there, though. With an election year approaching, the sheriff's time is nearly up with no one to challenge him on re-election. A community is torn in two, with everyone taking sides and two fathers pitted against each other--one of whom is on the local police force.

There's a lot to investigate here. It's possible there's a hell of a story in it.

 

[colddiesel]

In the Old Days it was common for law enforcement to let inmates murder other inmates by sheet hangings, or to stage car wrecks...brain the victim with a tire iron then roll his car over a few times. With the sheet hangings you just sit on the guy's shoulders and legs til he strangles.

My great uncle was the Governor of a major London Prison during the second world war.He told me a horrible story which is not disimilar to the subject of this thread and JBJ's comment.

Most of the warders were former servicemen from the WW1 and even the Boer war. The prison was very overcrowded with the usual felons plus a bunch there because of war crimes such as black marketing or looting (of bombed houses).

The prison was basically run partly by the warders and partly by the old time crims who kept their fellow inmates in order for their own benefit.

Into this mix came two old schoolmates. One was just a hoodlum and a thug doing a 7 year stretch. He led a small group of violent nasties who were challenging the old crims for dominance. Then the second schoolmate arrived. He was a qualified accountant who had done quite well for himself until he was held on remand pending trial on charges of financing and controling black marketeering. The two despised each other and for some reason that my uncle never established the accountant was soon anally raped by the hoodlum or one of his men.

Now this prison like many others had a steam laundry which did cleaning for an adjacent hospital as well. During the war they were also given the job of cleaning some of the hospital equipment. For this they used high pressure superheated steam.

Within a few days of the rape one of the hoodlums sidekicks was killed. How?
By having a steam nozzle driven into his rectum, he was then given a blast of superheated steam - essentially he was boiled from the inside out. Two weeks or so later a second buddy of the hoodlum died the same way.

No one saw anything. neither warders nor prisoners, no one held the men down and it was filed as an 'accident, sitting on a steam valve!'

Then my uncle explained, came the really nasty bit. The hoodlum had lost his sidekicks and was now very very afraid. But the accountant did nothing, not a thing except reminding him occasionally that he hadn't been forgotten. Meanwhile all the other prisoners turned against the survivor, they ostracised him, he was on his own, they teased him, tormented him . He slowly went mad. My uncle told me that after six months he had lost 40 pounds in weight and had been driven literally mad with fear.

Then suddenly the case against the accountant fell apart and he was released without going to trial. Uncle told me that the hoodlum believing he was out of danger fell into a sort of joyful hysteria.

But about one week later the old crims who he had formerly challenged took him on a short, one way trip, to the laundry. Again no-one held him down, no one saw or heard anything, and no one talked - filed as an accident.

Who ordered the last killing? My uncle said no-one knew, but the old crims were firmly back in charge.

The kind of men who ran prisons in those days, warders and prisoners had very set views on what was proper behavior - and how to enforce it. It made the Shawshank Redemption seem a bit tame when I first saw it. Uncles tale would make a great though horrible story especially the dramatisation of the hoodlums descent into madness.

 

[xssve]

Plot bunny for a true crime novel perhaps.

 

[FallingToFly]

Take it, run with it, and make it a damn good story, Witchy.

Everything is material.

 

[SweetWitch]

Take it, run with it, and make it a damn good story, Witchy.

Everything is material.

I think I will. I know a couple of people who are involved with the investigation. Might have an "in" there.