Please I need input from the Ladies here

[Tony from Aus]

I want to write my first story, which has been building up in my head and on paper for about a week now. since I joined this forum.
My problem is, being a guy I would like to know what would go on inside a ladies head as this story unfolds. Also I need to know what sensations you would be feeling physically.

The basic idea for this story headers as follows.
1. Happily married monogamous couple go to a restaurant for a romantic evening.

2. There is a table close by with 6 men. They range in age and height weight etc.

3. At the end of the couple’s dinner the waiter comes over, and tells them the elderly gentleman would like them to join him and his guests, at their table.

4. Wife dances with each of these men and becomes seduced by their attention.

5. The elderly man tells the husband while she is dancing, that these men would pay he and his wife, a great deal of money for her to have sex with them.

6. Part of the contract, would involve, the wife standing fully dressed with the Husband standing behind her, with every man in turn sitting in front of them naked, giving the husband instructions on where to touch his wife and how to undress her. This would ensure the husband was willing to let this happen to his wife.
The wife’s acceptance of the contract would be, when she took the hand of the man when it was offered to her, and he would then take her into the bedroom.

7. For them to be paid the full amount of money offered, the wife would have to make them cum at least three times in the 2 hour time limit allowed for each man.

Sorry this is so long, but I had to paint a basic picture of my story idea. There is heaps more, but I think this should give the Ladies on this forum an idea of what is going on in my head

PLEASE Ladies, contact me and help me ?

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Doesn't do it for me.

 

[Tony from Aus]

I understand that this subject would not appeal to all
But I do appreciate your reply.
Thank you

 

[SexyChele]

A lot would depend on whether the wife is reluctant at first. Perhaps she and hubby have hit on bad times, and the money is desperately needed? Something tragic will happen if they don't get this money. (ala "Indecent Proposal") Or is the wife more than willing, and looking forward to being with several different men?

Each type of woman would respond differently, initially. I'm presuming you would want the wife to be completely willing by the time she goes into the bedroom with each man. So, I guess my answer would be - it depends.

Oh, for me personally, it would depend on the type/look of the men involved. If they are all relatively attractive, that would be nice. If you set it up so that they are all not that attractive, it might take money to make me be alone with them for 2 hours and make them orgasm 3 times.

It sounds as though this is a very ambitious project. Six men, 2 hours each, 3 orgasms. Not sure how you are going to to do it, but it sounds like it would have multiple parts.

Good luck!

 

[MsLinnet]

I was interested up until number 6 then I lost it sorry

LiT

 

[Lovelynice]

Maybe you should change it from No.6 onward....it's at that point it leaves me cold as well. Besides, realistically it's an unfair contract....and there's no true guarantee of getting the money, even if fullfilled (which would be very unlikely).

The display business of No.6 just doesn't work for me, and would probably take too long. You need to add to the tension.

 

[MsLinnet]

Maybe you should change it from No.6 onward....it's at that point it leaves me cold as well. Besides, realistically it's an unfair contract....and there's no true guarantee of getting the money, even if fullfilled (which would be very unlikely).

The display business of No.6 just doesn't work for me, and would probably take too long. You need to add to the tension.

Way to go Lovelynice

 

[Tony from Aus]

Thanks for your input Ladies.
I will try and revise my headings and try NOT to get too carried away.

But I do figure the couple are very happy in their relationship.
Neither has even thought about this situation before (at least not openly to each other)
They are not rich people ( average middle class)
and the money offered to them, would pay off their mortgage.

The husband has mixed feelings ( Jealousy, but completely turned on by it) I want to take that part further in the story to help build up the tension.

The lady has had fantasies about other guys, but never thought she would be in a situation to put it into reality.

The Men ( thinking I may reduce the number to 3) The elder man Very rich, good looking, well dressed, Business man type. He is entertaining two clients, and wants to win their business. but not hire a professional call girl for them.

This man is playing a power game with the husband and wife, knowing that under the prim and proper exterior of this very attractive wife, lurks a woman who could be turned into a slut.

Does this help paint the picture a little clearer ?
Thanks for your input so far

 

[Pookie]

Neither has even thought about this situation before (at least not openly to each other)

If you are not worried about realism, then your first approach is fine. A happily married couple just would not get involved with a table full of men like that unless they had already been involved in swinging or had had many many many days of talking about it.

Now if the couple had been involved with swinging, including picking up strange men for threesomes. Then the story could work.

This man is playing a power game with the husband and wife, knowing that under the prim and proper exterior of this very attractive wife, lurks a woman who could be turned into a slut.

The power play that you refer to just isn't there. The man has no power over them. There is nothing at stake for the couple. Sure they could pay off the mortgage with the money, but are they about to lose their house? It's not realistic.

Their is no realistic power play involved in the bedroom since the couple would be willing participants the moment they walked into the room.

Would you let a bunch of men fuck your wife before paying you if that was the agreement? I don't think so.

The husband has mixed feelings ( Jealousy, but completely turned on by it) I want to take that part further in the story to help build up the tension.

If they are happily married, then the husband would tell the man to f- off. I just wouldn't believe a husband allowing that to happen given the setup you have.

If you are only want to write a stroke story, then don't worry too much about realism. Have some fun. But if you want people to believe the plot, then think about it from your own perspective as to whether it could realistically happen. A happily married woman won't become a slut in front of her husband without a tremendous amount of discussion.

Also, how likely would any man approach a couple they don't know and make that kind of offer?

Good luck with it no matter what you do. Enjoy if for yourself most of all.

 

[Lovelynice]

I said it was unrealistic, but pookie? You got right to the heart of the problem.

I talked to a guy about this too one day, and he said that he'd have got pretty annoyed if he read a story like that. Seems that it made him not only cold on the story, but angry at the assumptions behind it. I think if you choose to write it as is, then be prepared for hate-mail.

What I said before is still true, the contract is unreasonable and unfair, and nobody in their right mind would accept it. That makes it extremely unbelievable.

How many times have you seen a movie ruined by a dumb plot and dumb ideas, and been really annoyed at the stupidity of the characters?

Even if the story was supposed to be sheer fantasy, readers are still going to be annoyed at how stupid the couple is to accept such a dangerous, unfair, and likely ruinous arrangement.

The display thing would still have to be fixed up a lot too, because it would take too long. The sexual tension would die...you make it sound like a factory floor display.

Please reconsider the concept...

One thing I will have to say though, it was very smart of you to ask for advice from us ladies on this....but if you don't like it or accept it, then you should never have asked.

 

[Tony from Aus]

I must admit I did not expect to get any replies to my very first post in this form.

I do thank all of you for your input, I really do appreciate it

Oh yes, I knew I would probably be in for quite a bit of criticism, and I was fully aware, that some would not like the concept, and I was prepared for a bashing.

I am feeling a little stupid now for asking. (Not Smart ) I may even bow my head and cry a little, then tell you I don't want to play anymore, so I am taking my toys and going home.

On a serious note, The story concept would have been totally useless, without knowing how the lady would feel about the situation.
I may still write it at some time, very much modified, as it is this site, and some of the stories I have read here, that prompted me to think up the idea.

But, I think now, that maybe this "story" is best left until I have tried my hand at something a little less challenging.

 

[SexyChele]

I'm going to go a bit against the majority on this one. I actually think this would work. But I do think you should lower the number of men to 3 instead of 6.

It is pure fantasy, and while it might not appeal to the women of Literotica, I do believe most men would find this to be very exciting. I think most men would put themselves in the position of the business man - not the husband. And, not to forget, there are lots of men who have fantasies of sharing their wives, watching their wives become sluts for other men, although in reality they would never agree to engage in this.

Would this work for women? I don't know. From what you've stated, I would read it and probably enjoy it, if it were written well. But then, I'm sexually submissive and the idea of being put on display for a group of men just causes a tingle in me. It won't for other women. Same thing for men - some will think it's disgusting, others will think it's the best thing going.

Will you get "hate email"? Hell, you can get that by writing something very mainstream. I have received "hate email" for making my male characters "too Danielle Steele" - go figure. If you feel you want to write the story, write it. Just know that your audience is likely to be male and write to them.