BrenVarouse
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jul 31, 2002
- Posts
- 310
First of all thanks for looking.
Here's my problem. About six weeks ago my girlfriend of four years dumped me out of the blue. We'd been living together for three years and shared everything in our lives. I truly thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with her. She said she was no longer in love with me, it just wasn't working, she wasn't attracted to me any more yadda yadda... Any way I still love her and have been agonizing over her since she left me. But...
Back in April a girl I know from college said quite blatantly that if I wasn't with my girlfriend she would like to sleep with me. At the time I took it as a compliment and laughed about it with my gf. Now is a different story.
My gf and I started going out when we were in highschool and have only ever been intimate with eachother (I've never even kissed any one else, and yes I am a drama nerd).
Here's the problem. I saw the girl who offered to sleep with me tonight and when I told her that my gf had broken up with me she made it clear that her bed was still open. What should I do?
I'm still in love with my ex, but I know it's over. She just wants to be friends now.
I've always been attracted to this girl but would it be a bad idea to sleep with her so soon after such a heartbreak? I feel like it would be cheating on my ex. I was an extremely loyal bf, I barely even looked at other women while we were dating.
Would I be doing this only to help my fragile ego? To prove I'm still attractive? So I won't be the one left crying in my cereal when my ex finds a new lover? The idea of her forgetting me scares the hell out of me, what if she finds a better lover? Is this some attempt to prove to myself that I'm a good lover? That I will still remember being with her, that it will still be special (and by extension that she will feel the same way when she finds a new lover, that her memories of us will remain special?).
I need sound advice from people who have some Idea what I'm going through. Any one with any experience please help me, this is new territory. I'm so confused.
Please...
Thank you.
Here's my problem. About six weeks ago my girlfriend of four years dumped me out of the blue. We'd been living together for three years and shared everything in our lives. I truly thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with her. She said she was no longer in love with me, it just wasn't working, she wasn't attracted to me any more yadda yadda... Any way I still love her and have been agonizing over her since she left me. But...
Back in April a girl I know from college said quite blatantly that if I wasn't with my girlfriend she would like to sleep with me. At the time I took it as a compliment and laughed about it with my gf. Now is a different story.
My gf and I started going out when we were in highschool and have only ever been intimate with eachother (I've never even kissed any one else, and yes I am a drama nerd).
Here's the problem. I saw the girl who offered to sleep with me tonight and when I told her that my gf had broken up with me she made it clear that her bed was still open. What should I do?
I'm still in love with my ex, but I know it's over. She just wants to be friends now.
I've always been attracted to this girl but would it be a bad idea to sleep with her so soon after such a heartbreak? I feel like it would be cheating on my ex. I was an extremely loyal bf, I barely even looked at other women while we were dating.
Would I be doing this only to help my fragile ego? To prove I'm still attractive? So I won't be the one left crying in my cereal when my ex finds a new lover? The idea of her forgetting me scares the hell out of me, what if she finds a better lover? Is this some attempt to prove to myself that I'm a good lover? That I will still remember being with her, that it will still be special (and by extension that she will feel the same way when she finds a new lover, that her memories of us will remain special?).
I need sound advice from people who have some Idea what I'm going through. Any one with any experience please help me, this is new territory. I'm so confused.
Please...
Thank you.
