Please Explain

[R. Richard]

The product name is:

Martin’s 100% Whole Wheat Potato Bread

If it's 100% whole wheat, then it has no potato or other ingredients in it. If it's 100% whole wheat FLOUR, then it has no potato FLOUR in it. If it has potato in it, then it's not 100% whole wheat and not 100% whole wheat flour [chunks of potato could be considered very coarse potato flour.]

1) The product is a blatant example of false advertising.
2) The manufacturer is looking for a sandwich here, a knuckle sandwich to be exact.
3) The manufacturer is so dumb that they have no idea that what they're advertising is impossible.
4) Some unlikely explanation.

 

[THROBBS]

well it MUST be a WHOLE "loaf" of wheat-potato bread.

A wheat-potato being a potato grown in a wheat field. When thinly sliced it used to make samiches! 66.6% wheat-potato bread and 33.3% baloney...1% yellow mustard.

 

[Guest]

It's 100% bread (except for the additives and preservatives, of course).

 

[Liar]

Whole wheat potato. Amazing what them genetic engineers can do these days.

 

[Liar]

A wheat-potato being a potato grown in a wheat field. When thinly sliced it used to make samiches! 66.6% wheat-potato bread and 33.3% baloney...1% yellow mustard.

A 100.9% sammich?

 

[3113]

Whole wheat potato. Amazing what them genetic engineers can do these days.

Listen to Liar. As he well knows this is the invention of a Norwegian Scientist. Won the Nobel Prize for it. The wheat can actually be grown in the dead of winter because it grows down under the soil like a potato rather than up. Ingenious.

 

[Liar]

Listen to Liar. As he well knows this is the invention of a Norwegian Scientist.

Noweigan Scientist is an Oxymoron.

Geir Gunnar Oxymoron, professor of Argiculture and Taters at the University of Oslo, to be exact.

 

[THROBBS]

A 100.9% sammich?

no no....
see there are two mustard seeds preceding the one decimal or .1%

otherwise that would be silly!

 

[3113]

Noweigan Scientist is an Oxymoron.

Geir Gunnar Oxymoron, professor of Argiculture and Taters at the University of Oslo, to be exact.

Ah yes! Dr. Oxy. Though the original idea was not his as I recall. Weren't scientists in the Netherlands working on this during WWII in hopes of hiding their wheat fields from the Nazis?

 

[THROBBS]

Ah yes! Dr. Oxy. Though the original idea was not his as I recall. Weren't scientists in the Netherlands working on this during WWII in hopes of hiding their wheat fields from the Nazis?

The Netherlands "underground" experiments? hmmm. sound redundant...

MORE MUSTARD SEEDS!

 

[off2bed]

This doesn't help one bit:

The famous Dutch taste the whole family loves. 16g Whole grains per serving. 4g Of fiber per serving. Why Are Martin's Whole Wheat Potato Breads So Good? Because we use 100% Stone Ground Whole Wheat Flour, nonfat milk, potatoes, real cane sugar, cream yeast, vegetable oil and butter. Our Whole Wheat Potato Bread combines the nutritional goodness of Whole Grain breads with the unique, and popular, Dutch flavor of our Potato Bread. A taste your whole family will love! We are wonderfully gratified to know our customers enjoy Martin's Famous Breads; and, that they've made a very healthy choice in their diet. After all, we have been too hard headed to change a good thing for you for over fifty years! Why give up honest goodness now? We refuse! Made in the USA.
Ingredients:

100% Stone Ground Whole Wheat Flour, Nonfat Milk, Reconstituted Potatoes (from Potato Flour) Wheat Gluten, Cream Yeast, Sugar, Soybean Oil, Contains 2 Percent or Less of Each of the Following: Salt, Butter, Dough Conditioners (Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate, Azodicarbonamide, Monoglycerides and Diglycerides and Ethoxylated Monoglycerides and Diglycerides), Monocalcium Phosphate, Calcium Propionate (A Preservative), Soya Flour, Guar Gum, Ferrous Sulfate, Niacin, Thiamine, Riboflavin, Folic Acid, Datem, Enzymes, FD&C Yellow No. 5 & No. 6 Coloring.

 

[R. Richard]

You notice that they failed to say if it's ORGANIC, Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate, Azodicarbonamide, Monoglycerides and Diglycerides and Ethoxylated Monoglycerides and Diglycerides), Monocalcium Phosphate, Calcium Propionate.

Very important information, particularly in regard to the Ethoxylated Monoglycerides.

 

[THROBBS]

You notice that they failed to say if it's ORGANIC, Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate, Azodicarbonamide, Monoglycerides and Diglycerides and Ethoxylated Monoglycerides and Diglycerides), Monocalcium Phosphate, Calcium Propionate.

Very important information, particularly in regard to the Ethoxylated Monoglycerides.

I sure didn't notice that!

Perhaps the Potato itself is synthetic!

Have you seen Mr. Potato head lately?

 

[neonlyte]

100% Stone Ground Whole Wheat Flour, Nonfat Milk, Reconstituted Potatoes (from Potato Flour) Wheat Gluten, Cream Yeast, Sugar, Soybean Oil, Contains 2 Percent or Less of Each of the Following: Salt, Butter, Dough Conditioners (Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate, Azodicarbonamide, Monoglycerides and Diglycerides and Ethoxylated Monoglycerides and Diglycerides), Monocalcium Phosphate, Calcium Propionate (A Preservative), Soya Flour, Guar Gum, Ferrous Sulfate, Niacin, Thiamine, Riboflavin, Folic Acid, Datem, Enzymes, FD&C Yellow No. 5 & No. 6 Coloring.

WoW - 29 ingredients to make Bread (and no water ya kinda wonder how it sticks together)

My Sourdough contains: Whole Rye Flour, Sourdough starter (natural fermentation of rye flour and water), sea salt, water, olive oil. Me thinks their ingredient list contains 25 too many ingredients. My loaves last for a week, if we are lucky

The worse ingredients in their list is wheat gluten, added to speed manufacture. Natural gluten in the wheat is water soluble, but requires time to be released... so the gluten in the wheat gets released in the stomach giving the eater that 'nice bloated feeling'. Similarly, vitamin supplements are needlessly added, and coloring, WTF. That's not bread, it's a chemical dump.

 

[THROBBS]

Actually... I did see Mr. Potato Head recently... he was in a Bridgestone commercial with the missus during the Super Bowl.

 

[TE999]

Bread just isn't bread unless it sticks to the roof of your mouth like peanut butter.

 

[3113]

My Sourdough contains: Whole Rye Flour, Sourdough starter (natural fermentation of rye flour and water), sea salt, water, olive oil. Me thinks their ingredient list contains 25 too many ingredients. My loaves last for a week, if we are lucky

Recipe please! Including how to make the starter. I love sourdough.

 

[3113]

The Netherlands "underground" experiments? hmmm. sound redundant...

They weren't done underground, actually. Brave farmers with sacks of experimental potato/wheat strapped to their backs skied past Nazi patrols to a secret field, there to plant their spuds. Unfortunately, the ground was too hard and they had to abort the mission

The trick, you see, as Dr. Oxymoron discovered was in the Ethoxylated Monoglycerides. This allows the wheat-potato to be planted back in Autumn, and grow slowly enough to last the winter.

 

[neonlyte]

Recipe please! Including how to make the starter. I love sourdough.

Starter:
- wide necked flask 1litre/2pints
- add equal volumes of rye flour and water (filtered) to half fill the flask
- take a handful of UNWASHED grapes, red or white, and crush into the mix (the yeast is on the skin of the grapes)
- stir and cover with gauze (I use a green sheet pan scourer - lets the air through and keeps the bugs out)
- leave in a warm place for three days stirring each day
- on the fourth day, pour off half the mixture and replenish with equal volumes of rye flour and filtered water
- leave for two day stirring each day (it should be smelling sour by now)
- on sixth day, pour off half the mixture and replenish as before, most of ther crushed grapes will have gone by now as the rise to the top. The starter should be quite active but will not reach optimum strength until third or fourth bake.
- on seventh day:

Take a large glass bowl, add 450gms / 1lb rye flour, a level desert spoon of sea salt (adjust to taste for future bakings). Stir flour and salt. Pour half the starter into a well made in centre of flour. Add filtered water 1 part boiling to 2 parts cold stirring the mix until it reaches the consistency of thick COLD porridge, i.e. it sticks to the spoon rather than a pouring consistency. If it's too thin, add more flour. You need to stir until all the flour is wetted - you don't, in fact you cannot knead rye dough.

For a round loaf, line a small shallow wicker basket with a tea towel, heavily dust with flour(I use maize flour for a crisper base) put you dough onto the tea towel shaping into a round, dust with rye flour and cover with tea towel.

For a tin loaf, grease and flour dust the inside of a loaf tin.

Initially, the starter is weak and can take 6-8 hours to double in size, this will drop to 3-4 hours after 3 or 4 bakings. Leave in a draft free warm place until it is risen - it is ready to bake when a light finger press springs back slowly, if it leaves a dent, or has 'blow holes' on the surface it may collapse back slightly on baking. If it is under risen, you will get a seperation of top crust from the body of the bread - adjust with experience.

Heat you oven to maximum, with a baking tin containing water in the bottom of the oven. The steam off the water stops the top crust setting too quickly in the initial baking stage, and then encourages the formation of a deep caramelised crust. Very gently turn the round loaf onto a well dusted baking tin, this is much more difficult than it sounds, I usually do tin loaves as this rye loaf is very moist and doesn't like being handled.

Place the loaf in the oven - watch out for the steam when you open the oven door. Bake on max for ten minutes, reduce oven temperature to 180C - 350F and bake for a further hour. Remove from tin and place the loaf back in the oven to 'dry out' TURN THE OVEN OFF for an hour. Remove and wrap in a tea towel to cool. If the bread is still moist when you cut it, adjust the baking time, or water content.

The starter can be placed in the refrigerator until you next need to bake, do not seal the container, the yeast needs to breath, even in the refrigerator. Take out the day before, replenish once it has reached room temperature, leave for a couple of hours in a warm place until its frothing and active. Bake as before.

Enjoy.

If you want a lighter Rye, replace one third with white or wholemeal flour. You can use the starter for white bread, gives that wonderful 'old fashioned' taste to white bread, or baguettes.
-

 

[3113]

Starter:-

Wow! Thank you so much. This is awesome. Two questions:

1) If you buy grapes from the supermarket, even organic ones, they usually get sprayed with water now and then by the supermarket. Are they "washed" or unwashed? If washed...where do you get unwashed grapes?

2) The second time you put the loaf in to dry--do you remove the tin of steaming water?

Thanks!

 

[Liar]

You notice that they failed to say if it's ORGANIC

I don't want to eat bread made of organs.

 

[neonlyte]

Wow! Thank you so much. This is awesome. Two questions:

1) If you buy grapes from the supermarket, even organic ones, they usually get sprayed with water now and then by the supermarket. Are they "washed" or unwashed? If washed...where do you get unwashed grapes?

2) The second time you put the loaf in to dry--do you remove the tin of steaming water?

Thanks!

Sometimes red/black grapes have a 'dusty' appearance, that is yeast spores, don't wash it off. You will get the same if you leave a bunch of grapes in the kitchen for a few days instead of the refrigerator, yeast spores in the air are attracted to the surface. The starter will work without adding grapes, but it takes much longer to 'collect' yeast spores from the air and become active, with the added potential of attracting the wrong kind of yeast spores, say from cheese or beer, and adding an unwanted flavour to the bread. Incidentally, if you want beer tasting bread, buy brewers yeast

Yes, remove the tin for the 'drying off' stage. The water should have all evaporated by then in any case.

 

[THROBBS]

They weren't done underground, actually. Brave farmers with sacks of experimental potato/wheat strapped to their backs skied past Nazi patrols to a secret field, there to plant their spuds. Unfortunately, the ground was too hard and they had to abort the mission

The trick, you see, as Dr. Oxymoron discovered was in the Ethoxylated Monoglycerides. This allows the wheat-potato to be planted back in Autumn, and grow slowly enough to last the winter.

How odd... above ground potatoes that are meant to hide wheat fields from Nazis?

 

[R. Richard]

I don't want to eat bread made of organs.

"The less people know about how sausages and laws are made, the better they'll sleep at night." Quote, Otto von Bismarck

 

[DesertPirate]

I was 15 hours short of a degree in Marketing when I realized I wasn't qualified, I have a concience!