Plea for help, reply if you wish

[Jim1121]

Hi

Those casting an eye over my posting history will notice we have been here before, but as ever with a highly charged sexual conundrum I turn to the supportive pages of the Lit Forums.

In short, I am in a fantastic relationship, I hope that all can empathise from some moment in their past. One which provides a spring of happiness and is actually very sexually fulfilling.

I have an ongoing battle with my alter ego, a dark twin with a desire to taste the affections of another woman.

Partly it is a longing to know if a blowjob by any other lips would feel as sweet, for I have never felt but hers. Partly it is a quicksand grade resistance to the lure of the curvacious and full figure, the antithesis of what I admire now. But partly it is just the desire for a brief taste of the new, the heart pounding moment of a first kiss would even do.

I have resisted but I am subject to attacks against which I am ill defended. Wandering thoughts have now turned into vivid dreams. You can't imagine the strength of erotic feeling which came behind a dream last night in which the apple of my desire presided over me, her full breasts framed by tangles of long blonde hair, before sinking her lips around my cock. How can I wake up from that a sensible man?

Lastly, I even allowed my fantasies new ground to wander, letting myself weigh in detail the plans of paying for a young girl's company, of the fantasy that our night might drift to teasing lips and gently exploring tongues. How sweet even a kiss would be.

Please help me!

-Feaverous and Contagious

 

[Vixandra]

Hi overheated & as spreadable as the flu,

Beneath the heavy coating of alliteration, it seems to me that you're with a slender woman that you care for but are dreaming of a curvier blonde. While dreams and fantasies are part of any healthy psyche, cheating on your partner isn't so healthy. Aside from the well known risk of STD's pregnancy in girl #2, etc, there's heavy emotional connotations. If you feel that you cannot defend yourself against the advances of another woman, you may not be with the right one.

That aside, how pained would you feel if your girl cheated on you?

Have you tried turning those desires back into your relationship? Role play is an excellent way to add excitement to a relationship. Arrange to meet "her" at a bar (being played by your g/f in clothing she would not normally wear) and go from there. There are thousands of possible scenarios but I wouldn't recommend her pretending to be a prostitute and you picking her up in public- getting caught by the police is a great way to kill the night's libido.

In the end, you are an adult and YOU control your actions. If you choose to cheat on her, its something you did. If you choose to be faithful same thing. Man up, take control of yourself and do what you think is the right thing.

 

[nakdsub]

I couldn't have said it better...

Vixandra said it best.
We all have fantasies, but to cheat on your spouse is something entirely different. Are you a man of your word? Are you a man of character? Do you have morals? Are you a man of conviction. I guess we'll find out.

 

[Loverskitten]

How poetic. I have never been on a (may be) cheater's side but wow... I long for someone to dream of me, how you described your fantasy woman. I'm certain your love has earned some eloquent praise as well, I hope she knows. Swoon.

 

[SweetErika]

In February, you posted this:

I can sympathise with those who have fallen into a rut and are bored, it does not describe me, but it must be twice as difficult. I am in a fantastic relationship, that's why I think (hope) I will be able to resist when temptation finds me trying to avoid it, but I am still weak to it.
<snip>

Part of me is happy I will never stray, the other hopes I won't go to my grave with a life half lived.

So, what's changed? Is your relationship not fantastic now? Do you respect and love your current partner less? Have you gotten into something that's making you consider cheating?

I won't swoon like LK because cheating is fucking heartbreaking and dangerous. What gives you the right to break your promises to your current partner and put her health and life at risk without her consent?

If you're really at risk of cheating, I'd strongly suggest talking with your current partner about it. Maybe she'll reward your honesty by being open to a compromise (e.g. supporting you in kissing a woman who looks totally different, or whatever she would be comfortable with). But if you care about her, she deserves to have a say in the course of your relationship and her own health.

 

[Jim1121]

Many thanks for the replies. I well know the dreadful consequences and, like few I reckon, have measured up to my full responsibility for any passions acted upon. I have also fought hard against these urges with success.

I am trying not to act on them but the forces are very real, what comes with the fireworks of romance, which I ensure my girl is treated to at every opportunity, is a darker side of the simmering desire.

If I do something I will not pass the blame, and if I do it I will enjoy it. But right now I will enjoy the torture of unrealised fantasy and abhor the feeling of gradually loosing the battle with my twin.