Philosophical arousal

[LikeaSir]

I sometimes ask myself the question: "What is the core reason that we love sex so much?"
In other words: if you break sex down, what are the elements, feelings and facets that makes us enjoy and want it so much?

In my theory, this is a bit different for everyone. Therefore I'd like to first tell you what it is that I love about it and then read your versions of this.

For me the most arousing thing about sex is seeing a woman, making an effort to present her holes to a man as good as possible. My definition of good in this case would be: as clean as possible and well reachable. Seeing a woman sticking her ass out or holding her legs up so the man can make use of her holes is the core of all my erections.. What makes it even better is if the woman derives pleasure from having her holes fucked in the process of giving them to the man. This must also be why I (and others) love gaping holes so much. It symbolizes 'readiness' and it is the most pure form of feeling welcome I can think of.

Also probably the reason why I love DP a lot. The woman is giving her self completely for multiple men to enjoy. Seeing her get pleasure from giving her holes willingly is a real turn on for me.

Now you, please, make an effort to really think about your psych behind loving sex..

 

[serpentwrap]

"What is the core reason that we love sex so much?"

Several, will try to list the main ones, the way I feel:

For me sex is about expressing our love for each other to its hilt. As humans it is instinctive in us to seek pleasure. For me the greatest pleasure comes when you love someone so deeply, so intensely that providing any kind of pleasure or comfort to your partner provides you with a deeper sense of happiness. Good sex is about seeking and giving that pleasure.

So when you have that "earth-moved" kinda orgasm, that is the true purpose of sex. And good sex, for me at least, is impossible unless I am in love with the person for that moment at least. And that intensity of feeling is so strong that it transcends from you to your partner. That amazing, soul-ripping intensity of love you feel for your partner during love making is a spiritual moment. It may not always happen, but when it does, boy you know whey you love sex so much! As humans we strive for it.

In yogic practices (a.ka Tantrik sex), the endeavour is to achieve a state of bliss, kidn of a trance that people try through meditation. They say that your Kundalini (centre of your being coiled like a serpent) rests in your navel. Through Yoga, you learn to shift this kundalini from higher and higher till it reaches your brains. Once that happens one tends to get into a trance-like state where all you feel is extreme joy, happiness and contentment, not unlike orgasm. Great Yoga practitioners from the past are said to have reached this state of bliss through meditation and yoga and it can last for as long as one wants. Most of us experience a similar state of bliss during our orgasms. Unfortunately we can't make it last longer. But there have been times when one's love for the partner is so extreme, that during sex your eyes mist up, you become incoherent and your mind is free of everything except the sheer happiness of being with the person and enjoying the act of love. That, is teh state of bliss we as humans try to achieve. Doesn't matter if its kinky sex or gay or BDSM, the aim for all these routes is to achieve that state of bliss, that transitory Nirvana we achieve during a great love-making session.

That is why we love sex so so so damned much. Now if only I could find someone to love that with that intensity. sigh...

 

[Tomahawk26]

Seeing a woman sticking her ass out or holding her legs up so the man can make use of her holes is the core of all my erections.. What makes it even better is if the woman derives pleasure from having her holes fucked in the process of giving them to the man. This must also be why I (and others) love gaping holes so much. It symbolizes 'readiness' and it is the most pure form of feeling welcome I can think of.

Also probably the reason why I love DP a lot. The woman is giving her self completely for multiple men to enjoy. Seeing her get pleasure from giving her holes willingly is a real turn on for me.

this. For sure! I also LOVE DP, and presenting myself to be viewed and used by a man. I think the psychological core of what I get out of sex is the ability to completely let go and feel, especially since in my daily life I am an outspoken, alpha-ish woman, play roller derby and actually ideologically consider myself a feminist in many ways--but in bed I am subservient, like to be degraded and humiliated, smacked around, and enjoy various other behaviors that are in stark contrast to my daily self. The inherent contradictions are something I really enjoy in addition to the raw sensation I get to experience.

 

[LikeaSir]

Very interesting views so far. Thank you. What the lady said is really good to read. In normal life I'm a dominant, strong male, but giving my loved one control over me is like playing with a tiger. It's this strange honer feeling that you can give and recieve. Amazing how our brains work.

To the gentleman: good luck with finding what you would so much like! You've got a good mind, I'm sure it will one day come your way!

 

[Typo Fu Master]

Several, will try to list the main ones, the way I feel:

For me sex is about expressing our love for each other to its hilt. As humans it is instinctive in us to seek pleasure. For me the greatest pleasure comes when you love someone so deeply, so intensely that providing any kind of pleasure or comfort to your partner provides you with a deeper sense of happiness. Good sex is about seeking and giving that pleasure.

So when you have that "earth-moved" kinda orgasm, that is the true purpose of sex. And good sex, for me at least, is impossible unless I am in love with the person for that moment at least. And that intensity of feeling is so strong that it transcends from you to your partner. That amazing, soul-ripping intensity of love you feel for your partner during love making is a spiritual moment. It may not always happen, but when it does, boy you know whey you love sex so much! As humans we strive for it.

In yogic practices (a.ka Tantrik sex), the endeavour is to achieve a state of bliss, kidn of a trance that people try through meditation. They say that your Kundalini (centre of your being coiled like a serpent) rests in your navel. Through Yoga, you learn to shift this kundalini from higher and higher till it reaches your brains. Once that happens one tends to get into a trance-like state where all you feel is extreme joy, happiness and contentment, not unlike orgasm. Great Yoga practitioners from the past are said to have reached this state of bliss through meditation and yoga and it can last for as long as one wants. Most of us experience a similar state of bliss during our orgasms. Unfortunately we can't make it last longer. But there have been times when one's love for the partner is so extreme, that during sex your eyes mist up, you become incoherent and your mind is free of everything except the sheer happiness of being with the person and enjoying the act of love. That, is teh state of bliss we as humans try to achieve. Doesn't matter if its kinky sex or gay or BDSM, the aim for all these routes is to achieve that state of bliss, that transitory Nirvana we achieve during a great love-making session.

That is why we love sex so so so damned much. Now if only I could find someone to love that with that intensity. sigh...

Well said.

Good sex is physical, emotional and spiritual pleasure. Both giving and receiving. The pinnacle of this is the achievement of orgasm. I believe this is the goal of most people.

 

[Goey]

So far this sounds like "Things I like about sex" rather than reasons why.
Sadly any bit of research about why people enjoy sex comes down to boring old biology and chemical levels.

And then it's the whole psychological characteristics of internal and external locust and sex as a reflection of society. I'm not saying this isn't a good topic, but it's not the topic you claimed it to be.

What arouses you and makes you want sex would be more fitting in this case.

 

[LikeaSir]

Perhaps; 'the core of my arousal' would be a better title, but then again; the core of my arousal is also why I love sex so much so the title and OP are good enough

So far this sounds like "Things I like about sex" rather than reasons why.
Sadly any bit of research about why people enjoy sex comes down to boring old biology and chemical levels.

And then it's the whole psychological characteristics of internal and external locust and sex as a reflection of society. I'm not saying this isn't a good topic, but it's not the topic you claimed it to be.

What arouses you and makes you want sex would be more fitting in this case.

 

[sunandshadow]

The validation and praise aspect is the first one that springs to my mind. Both partners, assuming they intensely desire each other and want each other to be thoroughly pleasured, are giving a vote of confidence to the other by gifting them with their time, concentration, effort, and the opportunity cost that they aren't pursuing some other person because they consider this one person the most pleasant and worth pursuing. When a partner agrees to have sex with you, especially in the context of a relationship, it's the opposite of the romantic rejection many of us fear, a reassurance and acceptance that we have been judged to be attractive and good company, and sexually skilled enough that our partner responds with sounds of pleasure and words of praise/requests for more.

The way this carries over into what I personally consider intensely erotic, I tend to fall hard for characters in stories or movies who have been treated with prejudice or who are suffering from unrequited love, which is just a more personal form of being treated as an outcast, an unwanted person. It makes me want to hug them and give them chocolate and orgasms until they decide to forget the people who rejected them and focus on me instead. The subgenre of hurt/comfort romances and erotica is one that works with this pattern of desire.

 

[sunandshadow]

So far this sounds like "Things I like about sex" rather than reasons why.
Sadly any bit of research about why people enjoy sex comes down to boring old biology and chemical levels.

That's not entirely so, though it depends on your definition of "research". "Philosophy" is generally about things which can't be researched in any kind of specific way. But if you consider analyzing myths to be research, or psychologists surveying people about what arouses them to be research, there are at least three different fields out there where people are doing research about why people enjoy sex that don't have anything to do with chemical levels or physiology. Personally I would say that looking at the pattern of why an individual finds some things erotic and not others, then comparing to the pattern of other people who like similar things, is the best place to start guessing at why these people like these things and not others.

 

[LikeaSir]

Magnificantly said, sir.

The validation and praise aspect is the first one that springs to my mind. Both partners, assuming they intensely desire each other and want each other to be thoroughly pleasured, are giving a vote of confidence to the other by gifting them with their time, concentration, effort, and the opportunity cost that they aren't pursuing some other person because they consider this one person the most pleasant and worth pursuing. When a partner agrees to have sex with you, especially in the context of a relationship, it's the opposite of the romantic rejection many of us fear, a reassurance and acceptance that we have been judged to be attractive and good company, and sexually skilled enough that our partner responds with sounds of pleasure and words of praise/requests for more.

The way this carries over into what I personally consider intensely erotic, I tend to fall hard for characters in stories or movies who have been treated with prejudice or who are suffering from unrequited love, which is just a more personal form of being treated as an outcast, an unwanted person. It makes me want to hug them and give them chocolate and orgasms until they decide to forget the people who rejected them and focus on me instead. The subgenre of hurt/comfort romances and erotica is one that works with this pattern of desire.

 

[sdineen]

d

As a paraplegic my lifestyle is all mental and my arousal non physical/
oridnary events sexualise for me

 

[amofiga]

<<< I sometimes ask myself the question: "What is the core reason that we love sex so much?" >>>>

We have a sex drive because we are mammals. We're no different from monkeys, dogs, and horses. If we philisophize other reasons, it's because we as humans are taught to have reasons for things and our parents, church, schools, whatever tell us we as humans have to have higher values than animals. However, put whatever reasons and justifications on it that you will, it basically boils down to reproductive instinct and hormones. We just like to tell ourselves that we aren't that basic, but if you look at the things we do and the "mating dances" we do, we could easily have anthropologists from other planets studying us like Jane Goodall studdied apes.

 

[LikeaSir]

I now found the reason why I love sex so much. Thanks for all the reactions anyways, other people!

this. For sure! I also LOVE DP, and presenting myself to be viewed and used by a man. I think the psychological core of what I get out of sex is the ability to completely let go and feel, especially since in my daily life I am an outspoken, alpha-ish woman, play roller derby and actually ideologically consider myself a feminist in many ways--but in bed I am subservient, like to be degraded and humiliated, smacked around, and enjoy various other behaviors that are in stark contrast to my daily self. The inherent contradictions are something I really enjoy in addition to the raw sensation I get to experience.

 

[Goey]

<<< I sometimes ask myself the question: "What is the core reason that we love sex so much?" >>>>

We have a sex drive because we are mammals. We're no different from monkeys, dogs, and horses. If we philisophize other reasons, it's because we as humans are taught to have reasons for things and our parents, church, schools, whatever tell us we as humans have to have higher values than animals. However, put whatever reasons and justifications on it that you will, it basically boils down to reproductive instinct and hormones. We just like to tell ourselves that we aren't that basic, but if you look at the things we do and the "mating dances" we do, we could easily have anthropologists from other planets studying us like Jane Goodall studdied apes.

I already tried explaining this. Didn't work. This is just a "What do find hot?" thread...