Personal Disclaimer

[Wiggles]

Disclaimer-

Do you ever wish you came with a disclaimer? Just a small sheet of paper, warning people of what they're likely to encounter, so you don't have to apologize in the future.

Here's what mine would say:

Warning:
Contents are unstable, and at times very confusing.
This product has not been tested on most experiences, so use at your own risk.
Likely to emit crazy comments, and confuse the shit out of you.
Many forms of communication are misunderstood by this products intelligence system. Please use short words, and stick to the point.
Do not tease the product with sexual pictures, words, comments or innuendos. Unless you are prepared to claim full responsibility for the power surges, and igniting sparks.
Do not leave product unattended. Product will take nude photos of itself, and post them for the world to see when left unsupervised.

So, what would yours be?

 

[BigDawg69]

WARNING:

This product is the result of millions or years worth or research and development. Millions of lifecycles of testing and adjustment. It can only function at approximately 3% of it's total capacity at any given point in time.

This product has a highly developed intelligence, which it is not capable of controlling or using.

This product has been proven to be addictive.

This product is internally controlled and may be activated at any moment without warning.

This product can attempt to interact with and/or control it's surroundings through a variety of methods which may or may not be intrusive.

This product has FREE WILL and is therefore highly dangerous!

This product desires to see mentioned the pictures of the above listed product.

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

Warning:
Easily confused
Highly unstable, may blow up at anymoment, or may revert to dermotile state withouth warning.
May make strange noises.
Will say something stupid that can be taken many ways.

DONOT piss off, or may Mutate.

 

[Lady_Sam]

Warning:

Volatile.

If showing signs of frustration, please satisfy...or linger at your own risk.

Prone to confusion.

Prone to irritibility.

Known to make odd purring noises.

Don't let the demure look fool you.

 

[pabloback]

warning
you try this product at your own risk

 

[Siren]

Heres mine

 

[lobito]

Objects appear larger in the mirror, than real life.

Unlike Energizers, this products can only go SOOOOOO LONG, not going and going and going....

I could go on and on, but it took me a few hours, JUST to come up with those tacky lines.

Lo

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Warning...

"Don't try to understand her; just love her."

 

[JazzManJim]

Warning: Contents require closer examination for full enjoyment.

 

[MorgaineLaFay]

WARNING:

This product is the result of millions or years worth or research and development. Millions of lifecycles of testing and adjustment. It can only function at approximately 3% of it's total capacity at any given point in time.

This product has a highly developed intelligence, which it is not capable of controlling or using.

This product has been proven to be addictive.

This product is internally controlled and may be activated at any moment without warning.

This product can attempt to interact with and/or control it's surroundings through a variety of methods which may or may not be intrusive.

This product has FREE WILL and is therefore highly dangerous!

This product desires to see mentioned the pictures of the above listed product.

Duly noted

 

[perks]

warning: open other end.

 

[SilverVeil]

Avoid being in proximity to this product at certain times of the month. Failure to do so can result in bouts of tears and blaming you for everything that is wrong with the world. Including but not limited to the fact that the product at this time of month holds you personally responsible for the fact that Dinosaurs are now extinct.

Warning : Trying to mark your calender in hopes of predicting said certain times of the month is futile. It changes every time.

 

[kotori]

Viewer Discretion Advised

 

[Vivacia]

Mine would read pretty much the same as the ones above with the added

This product is Fiercely protective of her friends and it should therefore be noted that standing well back may be required from time to time...

 

[Kandi]

Disclaimer-

Do you ever wish you came with a disclaimer? Just a small sheet of paper, warning people of what they're likely to encounter, so you don't have to apologize in the future.

Here's what mine would say:

Warning:
Contents are unstable, and at times very confusing.
This product has not been tested on most experiences, so use at your own risk.
Likely to emit crazy comments, and confuse the shit out of you.
Many forms of communication are misunderstood by this products intelligence system. Please use short words, and stick to the point.
Do not tease the product with sexual pictures, words, comments or innuendos. Unless you are prepared to claim full responsibility for the power surges, and igniting sparks.
Do not leave product unattended. Product will take nude photos of itself, and post them for the world to see when left unsupervised.

So, what would yours be?

wiggles -- we're still waiting
for the photos