Perceptions

[Dixon Carter Lee]

When I first visted the desert (I spent a month in Phoenix) I caught the abolute worst cold of my life. They told me it was "Valley Fever", which is something us Eastern types get when first exposed to the dusty, zero humidty desert valley. I was laid out for a week with horrible fever, body aches, coughing, sneezing and other nasty things.

Sorry. Hope that didn't scare anyone.

 

[Siren]

Gingersnap that sounds like a possiblity.

 

[Siren]

Ah shit Laurel......

 

[Gingersnap]

Damn I am afraid of that DCL guy

Siren will do a journel search meantime call the Health Dept in your area. Sometimes they will screen for things and check out the local hospital med clinic. Sometimes they have an ID (infectious disease) clinic you could get into and they are pay per income. Teaching hospitals are the best amd Seattle has some fine ones.

 

[Siren]

Will do....

 

[Laurel]

Sorry Laurel didn't really mean to stir up that kettle of fish. I just get so tired of that "too aggressive shit" or "too caustic" , it is so freaking lame.

No need to apologize...This is an interesting topic for me because I sometimes have difficulty figuring out whether whether a woman is an obnoxious bitch or if she's just got a freaky sense of humor...and would I find her comments obnoxious if a man said them? Would they bother me? I am - like most people (would hate to be the only one!) - to some degree blinded by my own gender stereotypes...which is frustrating, because I want to believe that I'm free of such prejudices. It's interesting how a person's gender can make such a difference in how we perceive them.

 

[Laurel]

When I first visted the desert (I spent a month in Phoenix) I caught the abolute worst cold of my life. They told me it was "Valley Fever", which is something us Eastern types get when first exposed to the dusty, zero humidty desert valley. I was laid out for a week with horrible fever, body aches, coughing, sneezing and other nasty things.

Sorry. Hope that didn't scare anyone.

Just don't sit close to the monitor or sneeze on the keyboard and we'll be fine.

 

[ShimmerLikeAGirl]

Okay, I admit, I know very little about your site, mostly because it doesn't interest me. So you might be asking yourself, "Why the hell are you here then?" Well, the thing is, some of ya'll are bashing one of my very close personal friends, which I don't look too kindly upon. That friend happens to be CelestialBody, I actually know her personally, we've been friends for quite some time, and she has helped me through many difficult times in my life. None of you know her, and despite what some of you may think - the interest does not allow you to truly judge a persons character, nor does it allow you to judge their personality - so those of you who unfairly ARE judging her, or possibly "calling it as you see it", need to lay off. CB is one of the best and most understanding people I have ever met, to both women and men, and in real life, she's easier on WOMEN, not that it really matters. Oh yeah, and I'm a girl... and so are the majority of her friends. But even that is beside the point. So to those of you who feel the necessity to nit pick at people, turn the microscope on yourself for a brief moment, and examine the sex deprived pile of cells beneath the lens. Now go do something that will relax you... get drunk, get high, get laid... anything, just stop being so uptight. Pull the dildo out of your ass, because no one cares if who is right, and who is wrong. But you accomplish nothing by being a bitch. I know that this is by no means an appropriate way to enter into a conversation on a site that I do not personally agree with, and I apologize if I have offended anyone, that is not my purpose. I respect ones right to live the life that they choose, regardless of the idiosyncrasies involved. I just think some people here need to grow up. To the rest of you, rock on.

 

[Siren]

What the fuck was that?

 

[Gingersnap]

Siren can you get that dildo out its stuck!!!

[Edited by Gingersnap on 04-14-2001 at 10:50 AM]

 

[Gingersnap]

God I am glad we're not suitemates

Okay Shimmer I promise not to say anything to CB ever again.
This is so pathetic and I have lost a lot of respect for her and you. This is a discussion board now run along home sweetie and play on campus. This was a discussion before you started the whining now it is just that whining. Oh and thank you for the beautiful illustration of peculiar preceptions.

BTW Siren what you want to bet we never see glimmer again. Could we be a TROLL>>>

[Edited by Gingersnap on 04-14-2001 at 11:14 AM]

 

[Siren]

Gingersnap....

 

[Siren]

I dont know if she is a troll or not and it really doesnt matter.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

All right, CB's a sweetie. You're making too much of nothing. MP's not mean, she's just got a vocabulary and a punchy prose style. Gingersnap is...well, Christ, her name is Gingersnap. Everyone's fine. It's all me. I'm terrifing. See this bandage on my arm? *Riiiiiiiiip!* Did I scare you? Oooooo.

 

[Siren]

* Closing eyes, fingers to temples......I perceive DCL as....

 

[CelestialBody]

ShimmerLikeAGirl

 

[Svedish_Chef]

I was thinking about this just the other day...I too have noticed that when a semi-obnoxious male poster - a la Lasher - comes on board and gives everyone a thorough but witty assreaming, he's treated differently than a semi-obnoxious female poster - a la Deborah or Madame Pandora.

I like Lasher. I like MP. I like Deborah. I think all three have gone overboard more than once, but that's part of their charm. All three can get away with their wild posting style without garnering a reputation as a troll because they're intelligent and have well-formed (if occasionally wild & crazy) opinions. I'm using these three people as examples only because they're the most controversial, but it applies to all posters to some degree.

I think we should ALL sit back and examine our own biases in regards to male vs. female posters. I have 'em - I know I do.

I like em all, I dont treat em any differentally... though I do miss Madame Lash.

Its good that noone remembers my nastiness I spose but then again I know I'm not that significant.

And since when is Gingersnap nasty? Did I miss her being mean for all this time or is someone imagining things.

Ahhh eat me th lot of ya

 

[Gingersnap]

Cheffie I love you and heres a big kiss but don't tell Hecate or Debs.

 

[Renegade]

1. Why is something between Renegade and myself your issue? Back then you ranted about it on one thread, started a new one about it and still harp on it. Can't he speak on his own behalf?

Honestly? It's because I felt it better to simply ignore you rather then continue to carry on about our past troubles. At the time it seemed as though you weren't going to let it go as long as I kept responding to your posts. Due to that, I simply ignored your posts directed against me. There was nothing for me to gain by speaking back against you. Just seemed to me like it was a waste of time.

As for why CB was speaking on my behalf back then, it's simply because we're friends. Simple as that. When I get flamed at Lit, I just ignore the person or persons that direct these posts towards me. But when another member that I consider a friend is getting shit from someone, then I've been known to get involved. I'll take crap from people on the board and not say anything, but I'll jump in if a friend is being bothered. I don't want to put words into CB's mouth, but I assume that's the reason she felt the need to defend me at the time.

 

[Myrrdin]

I was thinking about this just the other day...I too have noticed that when a semi-obnoxious male poster - a la Lasher - comes on board and gives everyone a thorough but witty assreaming, he's treated differently than a semi-obnoxious female I think we should ALL sit back and examine our own biases in regards to male vs. female posters. but if we're aware of our biases it's definitely a step in the right direction.

Well I'm biased in favour of the witty flame. A put down that can be delivered without resorting to descriptions of anal rape etc.

Also rather than be biased in regard to the gender of posters, we're biased in regards to the victim of the flame. Especially if it's female and we've never seen them flame anybody else, but instead tolerate their peculiarities. Lately it seems most of the flaming of females has been done by other females.
Also it depends whether the flamer can take heat back, without losing all concept of "measured response". Or are they so thin skinned that they just go headlong for "mutually assured destruction".

 

[Ally C]

Before I go on, bitching of any sort-is a form of whining. Just because you're more eloquent-possibly the result of having too much time on your hands, doesn't make you any better than someone who's just plain whining. Parodies are also a form of whining. Write as many stories as you want, anything insulting, or mocking written in reaction to another is a whine in disguise. I'm a whiner, I'll fully admit to that. Don't think that you aren't simply because you profess to be "bad-ass." Sorry, it doesn't work that way. In case you didn't catch that, it's to everyone, not just Deb or Gingersnap.

So are we all whining by your definition? It's true that once we hit 'SUBMIT REPLY' our post moves into the public domain and our intentions for posting are open to public interpretation. We all pick up on things differently, but that's not what I'm trying to get to the heart of. Similarly, I'm not concerned with the variety of responses. I'd point out the 'WAIVER', but we all know about this. There is more at stake here however. This thread highlights the fact that freedom of speech is taken too literally by some. I'm not saying that anyone on this thread has actually done it, again, I don't think what people write is an issue - as long as they don't abuse that freedom of course (giving out names etc, but that's another subject from the one I wish to address).

To continue, I'm a big fan of the written word, and enjoy discussion, serious and light-hearted. Literotica provides these a-plenty, and I enjoy coming to the BB and taking part. Previously I got my fix at Lit Chat, which I still go to, albeit far less at the moment. I take exception to unwarranted criticisms which focus on particular writing styles, as if they were immutably fixed entities, each of us having our very own. There's a marked difference between personalising an issue and trying to personalise the way someone likes to post / interact with other posts. Yes, we all have our 'own' writing styles, and we all recognise other's senses of humour, sarcasm, and so forth. But why some seem to think that it's impossible or wrong to post beyond what is 'expected' of us is beyond me. I'll tell you why: I don't expect others to expect me to write in any particular style, to dictate my means of expression. I think this is tantamount to an intellectual warfare of sorts, a warfare that tends to end up in endless pre-emptive posts based on past misunderstandings, and is rather depressing after all is said and done [if such a time ever exists].

True, there are some who mimic others in an attempt to be abusive and / or misleading; but I think it's absolutely nonsensical to conflate these occurences with those who wish to express themselves as they would anyway. It's a rather lazy mind (to be polite) which assigns guilt by association. Again, given the content of this thread, I'm forced to point out that isn't aimed at anyone in particular, and is just a general observation. I'm comfortable posting as and when I see fit. Others have appeared uncomfortable with this, and I can't think for the life of me why. Am I being bitchy? I don't think so. Is this post an opportunity for me to whine? Not in the way described; I'm replying as the words "it's to everyone" were used. But these are my opinions and you all have yours. Where these opinions all meet is an entirely arbitrary space which we all pour our various and varying values into. It might be all words on a screen, but like RL everyone (again, in different ways) is trying to get an angle on things, trying to look good, get attention etc. The reasons for this aren't important, only to ourselves. As Laurel pointed out (to paraphrase), we need to turn our critical gaze away from those we 'see' here, and move it inward to the root of our respective problems with others: ourselves. I'm not saying that I'm 'holier than thou', this post isn't about comparative confrontation. I am saying that the stereotyping and judgement that goes on only happens on an individual basis. We all see what we want to see. When we see something which we don't like (and this covers a vast spectrum of possibilities) I'd like to think that we all have the ability to step outside our respective comfort zones and engage without recourse to bitchiness and whining. I know that not all of us will, but that doesn't mean the rest of us don't have to try. Having said that, and in line with my reasoning, 'bitching' and 'whining' are most welcome and necessary outlets on the BB too. I'd append my own definitions and limits to how these would be best utilised, but I don't like to be prescriptive. There's a difference between being flamed and shooting myself down in flames after all ...

[Edited by Ally C on 04-13-2001 at 03:21 AM]

 

[Iris]

OK, what I meant by Dixon scares me is not that I'm afraid he's going to show up at my door at 3 AM with a band of attack dogs and a machine gun, just that he often strikes me as too good to be true, and then when he gets angry or irritated, he lets out months of pent up frustration. That freaks me out a little. Sorry. Maybe it's just me.

I don't hate the guy, but neither do I love him. {shrugs}

 

[Guru]

 

[jcgirl]

The only colour I see is under Guru.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

OK, what I meant by Dixon scares me is not that I'm afraid he's going to show up at my door at 3 AM with a band of attack dogs and a machine gun, just that he often strikes me as too good to be true, and then when he gets angry or irritated, he lets out months of pent up frustration. That freaks me out a little. Sorry. Maybe it's just me.

You're right. It's just you.

Geez, "too good to be true"?LOL

Okay, look, I'll stop riding you about this "scared of me" thing, but, honestly, I'm fairly sure that whatever you're feeling has more to do with you than with me.

[Edited by Dixon Carter Lee on 04-13-2001 at 10:59 AM]