Parents say the strangest things

[Woodmiester]

What are some of the things your parents or the adults in your life as a youth said that when young seemed strange or funny, and looking back now brings a smile to your face, and do you find yourself now as an adult saying the same things to your little ones?
I'll start off and I did a search to see if something like this was done before and didn't see anything, so I hope it either hasn't been or was long forgotten cause I'm in a good mood and really would rather not see any attitudes for once

Mom - wait till your father gets home
Guy across the street when we got on his nerver - Vamoose
Mom explaining how babies were made - when mommy and daddy are sleeping goood makes them come together and sometimes babies are made ( looking back this was way more than I wanted to know )
Dad - you'll understand when your older

 

[lilminx]

Mom- I'm the mom- THAT'S why!

 

[MissTaken]

For some reason when my mother was angry she would add an additional middle name. Since she was never angry with me, it only happened with my brothers.


William Jefferson ALOUISHES Clinton!

You get to your room and leave the cigar and the young lady down here!

 

[Tyrael]

Mom- I'm the mom- THAT'S why!

I got the "because I said so!" and "my way or the highway!"

 

[lobito]

If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into next Wednesday. I didn't know what it meant exactly, but I figured it couldn't be all that good.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

me: why?
dad: because.
me: why because?
dad: because-because.
me: why because-because?
dad: just because, okay? Stop asking.
me: is it because you don't know?
dad: nonsense (dad then changes the subject).

 

[unclej]

my dad was the one that handed out the punishment and would always ask, "do you want me to whip you?"....never quite had the balls to say "sure, that's exactly what i want"....and then when he did whip us he say something like, "shut up now or i'll give you something to cry about."...couldn't win...i actually thought that that was what the whipping was for....

 

[seXieleXie]

Dad- Stop crying or I'll GIVE you something to cry about.

Dad- Sorry doesn't cut it

Mom-If I have to come up there you'll be sorry

Mom-I don't CARE who started it, I'm finishing it.

 

[Tyrael]

Dad - "If we tell you to go jump in the lake you better damn well do it!"

Mom - "Next time you roll your eyes at me i'll roll your damn head on the floor!"

 

[Woodmiester]

Oh damn the memories are flooding back now, unclej your's triggered one that I heard at least once a month.....

Dad - Go get a switch off the willow tree and it better not be dried out
Me - Come on dad give me anothe chance ( never did of course)

So out I go and yes, find one so dry it breaks apart with each step back to the porch and of course he'd go get it and come back with 3 or more all twisted together, then the classic

Dad - This is gonna hurt me more than it's gonna hurt you
Me thinking to myself - BULLSHIT!!!

He died before I had the chance to tell him he was right on that one, my son has heard it a time or two and yes, it breaks my soul

 

[BarberBabe]

My Dad always said " I don't care if it's black & I says it's blue ...it's blue " The ever popular one too (started by Bill Cosby I think) " I brought you into this world and I can take you OUT!"( wasn't sure if He really ment it ...but didn't want to push my luck .

 

[bored1]

If my Mom was mad she would always use my middle name when yelling at me or the generic "wait until your dad gets home" With my Dad it was Stop crying or Ill give you something to cry about

 

[starlis]

Mom (yelling): "This isn't yelling. You wanna hear me yelling?"

Actually, the thing my mother was best at wasn't verbal at all... it was The Look. (I'm sure there's a few others here who know what The Look is all about.) I still don't think I understand how a glare from my mother could be so incredibly threatening, especially since my mom is a tiny little thing... but it still works on us, and I think that's pretty darn funny.

And yeah... my father always used the "I brought you into this world and I can take you out" line, too. Classic.

 

[shynsexy]

my mother would always tell me:

if you stick your lip out any further i'll snap it off

because i said so

as long as your under my roof.....

if your not home by 10 dont come home.... (?????)

I still use "because i said so"

 

[Ishmael]

"Because I said so"

Yep, that was the one that drove me nuts and I SWORE I would never use on my kids.

Wellllllllll, when my oldest son was going on four, we were out one Saturday just spending itme together when it started to rain a little. I said, "Let's get under this awning."

To which he replied, "Why?"

"Because it's raining."

"Why?"

So I answered and that was met with a "Why?" too.

I was moving into the realm of quantum mechanics when it finally dawned on me that the little shit didn't understand a thing I was saying, or cared very much either. So to the final "Why?", I replied, "Because I said so!". End of discussion.

It turned out it was a set up. A neighbor lady had taught him the "Why?" trick and he was using it on me.

That son now has a son of his own that will be 5 in Oct. I visited not to long ago and quess what I taught the grandson? You got it!!!!!! "Why?"

I wonder how long it will take my son to say, "Because I said so!"

LMAO thinking about it.

Ishmael

 

[lovetoread]

Geez...what awful memories...

I got the "go out and get me a switch for your brother"

And after finding the limberest one,ya'll know the one...flexible,kinda green,could be used for more than one lick....

Only to find out it was for you.

What a rip off that was.

Another thing I hated was the answer to any whines or complaints...

I had to walk shoeless the 10 miles to school,uphill,in the snow,buck naked,backwards...etc,etc...the list got longer and longer as your complaints got smaller and smaller.

 

[Woodmiester]

roaring

Ishmael that story reminded me that I did the same thing to my brother when his girl turned about 3, and he was 45 at the time. I thought I was going to have to get a weapon he was so pissed off, thanks for the great reminder.

Made me remember that one I use my son is, If you make me have to get up from this pc you're gonna be sorry .... jk

 

[BarberBabe]

Lmao

A few more memories surfaced while reading this thread ...
As a child Mom always yelled " Close the damn door ! Where you born in a barn ?? Well it wasn't until I was older when she said the same thing ...My reply was " Well you ought to know ...you were there." ( I got popped for it lol) and the ever popular (while on a road trips and my brother and I fought ) "If I have to pull this car over I am gona beat the shit out of both of you " Never really stoped the fighting ...& she only pulled the car over once DAMN that hurt too!

 

[Cheyenne]

hehe... I think we all had the same parents.

I haven't taught any kids the "why?" game, but I have taught a few the phrase "are we there yet?" to be used every 5 minutes during a long car trip of 5 or 6 hours. I promised a present when the trip was over if they remembered to ask often.

I think my brother was going to kill me for that one.

 

[Ishmael]

LOL

hehe... I think we all had the same parents.

I haven't taught any kids the "why?" game, but I have taught a few the phrase "are we there yet?" to be used every 5 minutes during a long car trip of 5 or 6 hours. I promised a present when the trip was over if they remembered to ask often.

I think my brother was going to kill me for that one.

You are a sick woman Cheyenne.

Ishmael

 

[christophe]

My favorite: "Cause I said so, and that IS the Only reason you will ever need"

my child will need therapy...no doubt

 

[Ice Cold]

I love the line.... If your friends all jumped off a brifge would you?

"Depends on how high?"


or my favorite: Do I make myself clear.

reminding myself not to answer again: You're so clear, you're crystal. Got a good backhand out of that.

 

[Woodmiester]

How about, "If I told you once I told you a 1000 times" ?

Now maybe 30 to 50 but 1,000 times, I don't really thing so

 

[BarberBabe]

I remembered the "Get your own switches" too I was much smarter (maybe) than my older brother ..we were told to get a switch for a spanking ..well I went & got a small one, not real green & my brother came back with a damn tree...LMAO My Mom years later , said she had so much trouble spanking him cause he was so dumb about it ( I of course deserved it ) LOL

 

[freakygirl]

If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into next Wednesday. I didn't know what it meant exactly, but I figured it couldn't be all that good.

I was told this once.. ok.. more than once, but the one time that is most memorable was the time I said " Do it, atleast I wouldn't have to listen to you until next Thursday". Damn I didn't know mom could slap so hard.

I never said that again to her.