Paragraph length

[Nightscream89]

OK I reread it, and there is a couple places where I could break it up. However it ruins the flow of the story. It's all a build up to the end, and it feels like something that you need to take time and relish in.

And honestly, with it broken up my mind keeps telling me it's not long enough. I would want to add more, because you cant climax a story with 4 lines.

Idk, I'm just distraught.

A well placed break can actually raise tension and help your building. I can't judge of course before reading it, so can't judge if it will fit. But you could have the character linger on a thought for a brief moment.

At the end of a paragraph:
"But if that's the case" His thought linger for a moment.

Start of the next:
"Then this and this and this is also the case."

Or you could use a realization.
End of Paragraph:
"Wait, why didn't I think of this before?" a sudden realization hit him.

Start of the next:
"I got it now! It's this and this and this!"

Or if he is recalling something
End:
"And then" his thoughts froze for a moment.

Start:
"How could I forget? This happened! It makes sense now!"

Well you probably get the gist, you end the paragraph on the person realizing something, putting some puzzle pieces together or remembering something, but you reveal that at the start of the next paragraph. You keep your reader enticed while giving them a brief brake from the flood of information. Just enough time to let the reader think "What did he realize?" upping their curiosity and interest.

I get that it can suck sometimes when your story is rejected like this, since you are happy with your work and now feel forced to change it. But I would advice you to look at it and think how you can use the break in the paragraph to your advantage rather than just throwing in a break and being less happy with the result.

 

[LisaMayTurner]

Well, a mix of snappy bite size nibbles and fusions of richer developmental areas are required together. If people really get "fatigued" at reading more than 5-12 sentences in a paragraph then why bother even trying to write anything? Heaps of snapshot one-liners and bulletpoint paragraphs make a story lack depth and development and unified progression. If you can't write about sexual fun and passion using those aspects of literary requirement then you may as well simply not even try.

 

[StillStunned]

Heaps of snapshot one-liners and bulletpoint paragraphs make a story lack depth and development and unified progression. If you can't write about sexual fun and passion using those aspects of literary requirement then you may as well simply not even try.

I disagree. If anything, shorter paragraphs provide more control. If you work on the premise that each paragraph should focus on one person's actions, thoughts or speech, it stops you from rambling on and on.

You could say that long paragraphs are self-indulgence on the writer's part. That's fine if you're writing for yourself, but by submitting a story for publication you're implicitly writing for an audience. And audiences today will simply nope out of long walls of text.

 

[Audiflex]

I just submitted a story that was rejected for paragraph length of all things.

It was stated that paragraphs should be kept to 4-8 sentences in the review, however the actual posted publishing guidelines state:

4. Paragraphs
Please break your story up into reasonably sized paragraphs. Literotica stories are often read on small screen devices where excessively long paragraphs fatigue some readers. Stories with few/no paragraph breaks may be sent back for further editing.

I think the paragraphs that I used are all reasonable length. There's only 1 slightly longer paragraph at the end (about 24 sentences, all relatively short/medium length), but it fully encompasses a single complete thought. There's not really anywhere I can logically see to break it apart, nor do I want to just for the sake of making it shorter. It definitely doesn't qualify for "few/no paragraph breaks".

It feels like the spirit of that guideline is to avoid stories that are written in a single large block of text. My story is broken into about 58 breaks/paragraphs. Not to mention that I see many other stories with paragraphs much longer than my own. In my opinion some of the stories I've read recently that are all 1 or 2 sentence lines just seem sloppy, like a stream of text messages. But they're welcome to post stories like that if they want, its how they intended to write them.

Am I wrong here? Am I just ranting? Is this the greatest sin?

Best Regards,
~Beliefofmine

Nah, you’re not wrong, this feels nitpicky. Your story sounds well-structured with plenty of breaks, and that one longer paragraph seems justified if it’s a complete thought. The guideline’s spirit is clearly about readability, not rigid sentence counts. It’s frustrating when subjective calls like this happen, especially when other stories with shorter, choppier paragraphs get through. Maybe tweak the long paragraph slightly to appease the reviewer, but don’t stress too much. Keep writing, your approach sounds thoughtful and intentional!

 

[Audiflex]

That's fair I suppose. But if half of my story is just the narrator's perspective, and there's no dialog going on because they're alone, breaking thoughts into 1 sentence blurbs seems spastic.

I get the phone thing. But when 4 sentences becomes a whole page of text, I don't know if you really can do anything.

I'm not trying to cater to every reader. I have my own opinions about the downfall of modern society, which could be it's own post.

I worry more about mods pushing a uniform format that changes the unique creativity of each author into a bland, dime a dozen, format. The diversity of style is what makes writing great. Not everything is for everyone. Some people write for the masses, and some don't. I didn't get the impression that these were curated/editorialized works.

You wouldn't tell an modern artist to paint with a classical style. We accept them as they are.

You’re absolutely right, diversity in writing style is what makes storytelling so rich and unique. Forcing a uniform format risks stripping away the creativity that makes each author’s voice special. While readability is important, especially for mobile readers, breaking every thought into one-sentence chunks can feel jarring and unnatural, especially in introspective or solo scenes. It’s a balance, but ultimately, staying true to your style matters. Not every story needs to cater to the masses, some are meant to be niche, and that’s okay. Keep writing your way!

 

[beliefofmine]

I'm going to just leave it at this.

I'm newish to writing, and will take all of this feedback as constructive criticism for future works. I've turned a chapter in my life and I want to be engaged here for a long time.

My intention is not to fatigue readers. I'll try to remain cognoscente of that, and find ways to articulate my thoughts in new ways going forwards. Just like a haiku has an artful format of poetry, not all poems are haikus.

 

[ElectricBlue]

I'm going to just leave it at this.

I'm newish to writing, and will take all of this feedback as constructive criticism for future works. I've turned a chapter in my life and I want to be engaged here for a long time.

My intention is not to fatigue readers. I'll try to remain cognoscente of that, and find ways to articulate my thoughts in new ways going forwards. Just like a haiku has an artful format of poetry, not all poems are haikus.

I suspect you might be thinking about it far more than readers would.

If your style is really fluid and easy to read, readers will focus on the story, not technique. If, on the other hand, your style puts up road blocks, readers are going to let you know. You'll find out soon enough. Hope your story goes well.