Other astonishingly time-consuming projects you can use to "get" Literotica

[Dixon Carter Lee]

1) Spend a year and half on the European promotion circuit establishing your new boy band "The Lits!" performing hit singles like "Bratcat Sucks and Junk!"

2) Spend months trying to sell Intrigued's nudie photo on e-bay, making sure to keep Lit informed about the bids, daily, on a thread called "Payback is a Bitch!" that you have to keep bumping yourself.

3) Spend thousands promoting a Vegas boxing match between Laurel and Stuttering John, and then taunt her on Pay-Per-View when she doesn't show up, or even know about it.

That'll show us!

 

[littlekateyes]

LMAO

 

[Guest]

How can you call yourself a stand-up comedian?

 

[*bratcat*]

Re: Other astonishingly time-consuming projects you can use to "get" Literotica

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

How can you call yourself a stand-up comedian?

Because of the LMAO above you. Please tip your waitress.

 

[Angel]

Because of the LMAO above you. Please tip your waitress.

I take Visa, Mastercard and AMEX. No Discover.


Thanks.

 

[Guest]

Because of the LMAO above you. Please tip your waitress.

But it's cheating when you LMAO at your own jokes.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Yeah. Good one. Go bump one of your threads.

 

[Problem Child]

But it's cheating when you LMAO at your own jokes.

I haven't called you stupid today, have I?

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

LMAO

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

LMAO at my "LMAO".

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[Hamletmaschine]

LOL at DCL's "LMAO at my own 'LMAO'"

Now, where's that damned waitress?

 

[Guest]

BTW...I get a percentage of your tips if you are using my name in your act. Royalties on copyrights and all.

Are you on re-bound yet? My cock needs servicing.

 

[tortoise]

The veal is overcooked, but the jokes is funny.

 

[Problem Child]

Are you on re-bound yet? My cock needs servicing.

I haven't? Oh...ok. You are fucking stupid.

See ya tomorrow.

 

[RawHumor]

4) Create your own Literotica political party with the slogan

"I'll rape you bitches and... Did I mention I run a computer store when I'm not doing secret military service? I promise if I'm elected, DCL will no longer be considered funny, even when he is."

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

5) Get a cable access show with a green screen background so you can rant about Literotica in front of lemming footage. Make sure there's an American flag in the background.

 

[Problem Child]

1) Buy a used volkswagen bus.

2) Mount loudspeakers on the roof.

3) Drive around your town announcing things like:

"Bratcat is a whore!"

"PC out-trolls the trolls"

"Dixon Cunter Lee is a pedophile!"

4) Appear in court with your mom and dad for your disturbing the Peace trial.

5) In lieu of #4, change your screen name to Jean Val Jean in an attempt to recycle your schtick for the tenth time.

 

[Shiner]

Does this thread come with it's own drum roll ?

 

[HeavyStick]

1) Buy a used volkswagen bus.

2) Mount loudspeakers on the roof.

3) Drive around your town announcing things like:

"Bratcat is a whore!"

"PC out-trolls the trolls"

"Dixon Cunter Lee is a pedophile!"

4) Appear in court with your mom and dad for your disturbing the Peace trial.

5) In lieu of #4, change your screen name to Jean Val Jean in an attempt to recycle your schtick for the tenth time.

Another list I didn't make.

 

[peachykeen]

Hee, hee, hee. I love you all, I rilly rilly do.

Lousy fuckin waitress though, where the hell is my drink?

 

[Angel]

Sorry

 

[concrete]

1] best Christmas seller..the LIT grammer + spell checker program
2] the LIT,,under the influence keyboard restraint
3] the non - double posting,,thread starting program..sponsered by LIT.

 

[Samuari]

1] best Christmas seller..the LIT grammer + spell checker program

I'l take two, please, gift wrapped and COD.