Orgasm issue

[BrokenPoet]

Alright, I'm having trouble getting this girl off. I know I can do it, because I've given other girls orgasms before, using either my mouth on their clit, my fingers on their g-spot, or a combination of both.

She gets to a point where she says it feels amazing, but is torturous because it simply won't go any further. I don't know if it makes a difference, but I think she's a squirter since she says it feels like she has to pee really bad, plus I know her sister is one. She's 18, if that matters.

But anyway, despite going down on her for a good hour she wouldn't orgasm. Can anyone give me an idea of something that might help?

 

[tammytoodles]

;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

 

[infinity706]

Now, don't be discouraging him from eating pussy for an hour. There's plenty of women out there that would love that and get 6+ orgasms from it.

 

[BrokenPoet]

That occurred to me. I was also afraid that maybe she was afraid to cum because what might happen. Though she's never orgasmed, she strongly believes she's a squirter, so she think I'll find it disgusting or something (despite my assurance that it's not true). Is there some way I can make her feel less awkward about cumming?

I happen to LOVE eating pussy. There are many times where I'll just do that and never get myself taken care of. Don't get me wrong about this, I enjoyed every minute of that hour, and only stopped because she made me.

 

[mynameiskate]

Yeah, it's probably all the pressure. This guy couldn't make me have one no matter WHAT, but then I realized that it was just because I was really nervous. Try to be more calm about it.

Good luck!

 

[SusyQ]

She's never had an orgasm at ALL? Even masturbating?

See, this may be your problem. She needs to figure out what makes HER feel good (not the girls you've been with before, not her sister). The best way to do that is by masturbating. That takes a lot of the pressure off her. Then she can show you what to do.

There are a couple of misconceptions here that struck me as I read your post. First, every woman is different. The fact that you could get some other woman or women off doesn't mean that you'll be able to get the next one off. What you do for one woman is not necessarily what will work for another. Many women climax from clitoral and/or gspot stimulation, but not every one. You have to be willing to try other stuff and take direction from her.

Second, just because a woman is a "squirter" doesn't mean she'll squirt every time. For most women, it's an on and off thing, depending on a lot of factors. And I haven't ever heard that it runs in families.

 

[BrokenPoet]

As a college student, I've actually met a large amount of girls who haven't orgasmed yet, masturbation or not. I know it helps to get input from them, that's how I learned in the first place, but it seems like what I do works...it's just that there's some hidden obstacle. I'm definitely willing to experiment with just about anything. The only direction she seems capable of giving me is "stop" when she's had too much.

I'm aware squirting isn't genetic or anything, but she seemed to think she was one. The fact she said she had to pee is what tipped me off. I don't know if that's a real indication, since I haven't gone down on a large number of girls, nor experienced a female orgasm myself (sadly). Regardless, it seems to be a serious fear for her.

 

[SweetErika]

She's never had an orgasm at ALL? Even masturbating?

See, this may be your problem. She needs to figure out what makes HER feel good (not the girls you've been with before, not her sister). The best way to do that is by masturbating. That takes a lot of the pressure off her. Then she can show you what to do.

There are a couple of misconceptions here that struck me as I read your post. First, every woman is different. The fact that you could get some other woman or women off doesn't mean that you'll be able to get the next one off. What you do for one woman is not necessarily what will work for another. Many women climax from clitoral and/or gspot stimulation, but not every one. You have to be willing to try other stuff and take direction from her.

Second, just because a woman is a "squirter" doesn't mean she'll squirt every time. For most women, it's an on and off thing, depending on a lot of factors. And I haven't ever heard that it runs in families.

Exactly. Excellent advice here, BP; you'd be wise to take it.

I recognize the pattern you're describing. It feels really good, and then it just plateaus and doesn't lead anywhere. What works for me is teasing and taking breaks when the pleasure level goes down. She'll have to tell you when she needs the breaks, and it probably won't work the first time, but it might work with enough practice and fine-tuning, especially after she's learned to orgasm herself and can teach you what works for her.

So, encourage her to experiment in a variety of ways on her own (many women have their first orgasms with a vibe, and that might be a good transition tool, BTW) and try different patterns and combinations, all without pressuring her.

Not to burst your bubble, but the hard truth is that a lot of (young women especially) fake it, so your technique may not be as tried and true as you think, and she may not be as different from other women as you believe she is. Just because a woman doesn't come doesn't mean she's unfulfilled or didn't enjoy it immensely, so while it's great to try, it's unwise to make it your focus or measure of success.

Your gf may just need more time to get comfortable with herself and you, too. It's not something that can be rushed, and trust me, trying to come or even having the inkling that your partner is disappointed that you're not getting there, can make it difficult-impossible in no time flat!

 

[darjingle]

Who is this for, you or her?

If you guys really like and are comfortable with each other, you might try this. Ask her to masturbate as she usually does, and ask her if there's any way you can be a part of it. My wife comes very intensely when lying on her side squeezing her legs together. She likes pressure, not friction. In that position I can be inside her and be doing all sorts of sweet things with my hands. We both love it, and it was a strong leap forward in our intimacy together.

This was a woman completely unresponsive to my "bag of tricks," and I had to re-learn how to make love, not to "a" woman but to THIS woman. The first order of business was to change "make love TO" to "make love WITH."

Be with her, and she'll open to you. It works in reverse too. Have fun.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Alright, I'm having trouble getting this girl off. I know I can do it, because I've given other girls orgasms before, using either my mouth on their clit, my fingers on their g-spot, or a combination of both.

She gets to a point where she says it feels amazing, but is torturous because it simply won't go any further. I don't know if it makes a difference, but I think she's a squirter since she says it feels like she has to pee really bad, plus I know her sister is one. She's 18, if that matters.

But anyway, despite going down on her for a good hour she wouldn't orgasm. Can anyone give me an idea of something that might help?

*blink*

You fucked her sister? Any chance that this means she's not relaxed enough to climax with you?

 

[conejita]

Uti

If she feels she needs to pee there may be chance she has an UTI

 

[Milly66]

Firstly, can I say just because you have made other girls cum does not mean you can make them all!! Secondly you are making this sound like it's some kind of job that you need to succeed at rather than something you really enjoy. It does not reflect badly on you if you can't make her cum. Maybe this is your problem, she is picking up on the fact that you are making it into an issue. Sex should be about pleasure and enjoyment not proving how good you are at making someone cum. Maybe if you stopped trying so damn hard and just chilled and had fun it would happen. Like I said relax it's meant to be fun.

 

[BrokenPoet]

Haha, no, I didn't fuck her sister. I'm just aware of it through other means.

Really, I am just doing it because I enjoy it. I stayed down there for an hour because I loved sucking on her, and, like I said, I only stopped because she wanted me to. If she'd let me, I'd have stayed down there for three hours, whether she came or not. I just feel like she should get to cum, you know? She clearly wants to. I figure she does need to relax a bit, so I figure I just need a way to soothe her.

Bu the way, we haven't fucked yet. I've just gone down on her and vice versa.

 

[tammytoodles]

/////////////////////

 

[BrokenPoet]

I haven't had the chance to see this girl in about three weeks, but I'll try to keep things more relaxed and calm, less tension and whatnot next time we get together. I'll try to keep y'all posted

 

[Milly66]

I could be wrong but... there is a possibility that she may have issues with guilt etc. I say this because once upon a time I had major problems with "letting myself" orgasm. I would get so far, and no matter how much or how hard I or others tried it just wouldn't happen. You think it's frustrating from your point of view, lmao it is nothing compared to hers. Then when I finally got over that issue, I couldn't cum till I had made sure that they had so I was improving but not much. I still like to make sure that my partner cums now, but I have learnt that my fun is just as important as his, plus these days it's no longer an issue as I am multiple. Just thought I would suggest it as like I said I used to really wanna cum but I just couldn't.