I've watched a girl friend give oral a few times, but I never watched myself do that. How would I anyway? My eyes are closed for the most part
A few years ago, out of curiosity, I took a selfie while I was doing that. Didn't do anything for me, but the guy I did that to liked it. I didn't want anyone seeing that on my phone, so I deleted it afterwards
I love watching while a woman looks up at me with a cock in her mouth.
See, why did I not pay attention to this thread before?
This is a really appropriate thread right now.
This is actually something that has been a huge focus in my life the last 11 months.
So why is oral so important, special, etc?
I know it has been said 100 times, don't expect groundbreaking realizations here... but.
For me I think giving oral pleasure is the single thing that I enjoy most. I liked the first post of the first thread that distinguished oral servitude from oral sex and mouthfucking etc. I agree, they are completely different things. It isn't so much about style as mentality.
Sir and I have been round the bend twice. The first time was going on 14 years ago now... 13 or 14. I know if given him oral in college...I think... but it certainly wasn't memorable. HE was memorable, it wasn't. Then 13 years ago I over thought, freaked myself out and was just generally awkward. I has so much going on in my own head. I really did him and myself a disservice. The two things I regret most in life actually came about in that #1 I shied away from tasting him because I was scared of my own reaction I was scared of offending him or embarrassing him. #2 I made a comment that rushed things.. I'm too embarrassed of myself to even repeat that out loud.
Last year when we reconnected I was overly cautious of people in the house and backed out of it for fear of people walking in. I regretted it all year. When I asked him one day what was one thing no one had ever done for or with him that he wanted and he said "swallow my cum" my answer was an immediate far too hasty and happy hand raised straight in the air " MINE!" I call dibs. Mine. Please, seriously, mine. Save that first for me, please. " after he quit laughing at me, and I quit laughing at myself I explained exactly how completely serious I was. I explained how much I'd beaten myself up over and regretted those scenarios all these years. How is actually never done that ( one more time he balked at the *out there* things I've gone and the normal ones I havent) and how sincerely and deeply I really really wanted to give him one thing is never given anyone else.
Over the year on occasion I'd hint at it and remind him. Occasionally check in and make sure it hadn't become a been there done that. Until one day he asked me WHY. Why was it seriously something I wanted? Why did I want it now when I'd been so skittish all those years ago?
So I wrote him a long explanation which I'll ask permission to share . The crux of it is this:
Mindset.
All those years ago I was his lover, his girlfriend, the girl he was courting... not his girl. He was not my Sir. It was oral sex. Oral sex is great, don't get me wrong... It is beautiful and I love giving it... but the headspace I'm in is one worrying If I'm doing it right? If it is good enough? If I'm taking too long... God forbid I'm receiving then im tortured worrying if he dislikes anything... feeling guilty that I'm not giving...
But this isn't that.
There is a time and place for mouthfucking, and that is different too. I like it more than oral sex because then I KNOW he is happy... but at the same time I take no pride in it. I'm doing nothing. I'm providing place... and space... but it isn't my soul.
Oral servitude is just that ... It is my soul. My heart. All of me given over on a plate, every ounce of my love and desire put into showing him slowly, deeply, concertedly exactly how much he is to me. My desire to taste him stemmed from the same mental concept I have as to why I love when he leaves marks on me. It is a place I can see and touch and say "his."
Tasting him was in a way a very animal concept. The concept that it becomes part of me. Inseparable. Also it was very much the concept of " he wants and has never had... dear God let me give it to him. "..
Needless to say I thought on it more than a hundred times over the year. When time came and I managed to find a way to get us 10 minutes behind a locked door he had warned me repeatedly that he had NEVER come from oral alone, even after 2+ hours. I was zero percent concerned. Not because I believed I had skill... but because all that mattered was me having the chance to show him every ounce of my feeling in such an intimate way.
Since that day not a single day goes by without me thinking back over It, replaying it in my mind. From the moment I asked if I may unbutton his shirt to asking one last time if he would let me. The minute he said " you May"
Without a seconds hesitation sinking to my knees and every feel of his skin on my tongue, his smell, how I actually concentrated on feeling his muscles under my hands. Looking up into his eyes only once to find them locked on me. When he gave in and wrapped his hands in my hair which he has NEVER allowed himself before ... what was surprising to me was this:
I wasn't thinking. I was not at all thinking. I was feeling. Completely emotion driven. No focus on insecurity or worry... no conscious thought at all, just love and desire.
Secondly... I do remember from 14 years ago when I tasted a little of him that it was so strong it made me squeamish. It was not that AT ALL. I actually couldn't claim it had a taste. This could be once again because I was so overcome at that moment with the enormity of it for me that all I felt was overwhelming joy and gratitude. I grabbed him around the waist and literally cried. While he ran his hands through my hair.
I can safely say it was the third most significant sexual experiences of my life.
#1 being the time he showed me i was capable of orgasm.
#2 When my husband agreed to try to have a baby ( id been told for 5 years don't even ask)
#3 is this. I'd put it at it tied with #1 but it would seem too disrespectful.
Since then we have talked about it numerous times. He says the reason he thinks he could where he never has again is because of a look he sees in my eyes. It is the same look that made him blurt out last year that he could be my Sir. He says it is a look of need that he has NEVER seen before or since ever. He had wanted to film It, but apparently he didn't get my hints about the showerso apparently I caught him off guard.
Sorry if this rambles... but that is why It is my favorite thing to do, hands down bar none. I've never felt more special more right, more complete more in my own skin than at that moment.
I've heard that from a lot of women.
