Open Letter for Undergrads Taking Exams for Humanities Courses

Olivianna

pee aitch dee
Joined
Dec 21, 2001
Posts
13,760
1. When you're writing an essay, be sure to have a thesis. Don't just provide a descriptive list - you want to make sure that you relate points/facts to function/purpose/result.

2. Filling an essay with information that is correct doesn't mean that that is what the prof./T.A. is looking for. If you're asked to write about the French Revolution and you fill up 2 pages explaining the engineering of the guillotine, don't be surprised when you bomb the exam.

2. Use correct spelling and grammar. Lots of students seem to be under the impression that grammar and spelling only matter for English papers and exams. No, in the university, every class is a writing course.

3. Don't use slang or hyperbole. It may seem funny to you when you compare a particular historical event to a screaming match on Rikki Lake, but in the grander scheme of things, it just won't be properly appreciated.

4. Do feel free to approach profs/T.A.s with questions about point systems on exams and possible grading errors. Ask for clarification.

5. Be sure to include a $20 bill in your blue book prior to turning in the exam.

6. Read comments written by prof/T.A. - they spend a lot of time writing those scribbles. They're there to help you. Use them and be strategic - in those comments lie your keys to success (unless your Prof./T.A. is a complete moron, in which case you should disregard them).

7. If you bomb the exam, see the prof./T.A. for help. Most of them would prefer to sit around during their office hours not messing with students, but then they're paid to be there - might as well bug them.

8. Take notes like a mad motherfucker in lectures and sections. Therein lies your key to success.
 
scotty goes to FSU biotch number 1 party school in the world YEEEEEAAAH BIOTCHZ!!! if a teacher fails me ill fuck her in the ass
 
HighSchoolJock said:
scotty goes to FSU biotch number 1 party school in the world YEEEEEAAAH BIOTCHZ!!! if a teacher fails me ill fuck her in the ass

F

I expect you would flunk every exam. Not that I wouldn't hope for better for you. Some people just don't belong in college.
 
I really could have used this 6 years ago. Especially the last one.
 
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Good advice, esp. the $20 bill in the blue book.
Will use that next semester and see if it really works! :D
 
Olivianna said:
F

I expect you would flunk every exam. Not that I wouldn't hope for better for you. Some people just don't belong in college.
Cracked me up.
 
Looks like Scotty's back. What happens when a dude teaches the class tho? (I recommend fucking his wife and his 18y/o daughter up the ass)
 
HighSchoolJock said:
scotty goes to FSU biotch number 1 party school in the world YEEEEEAAAH BIOTCHZ!!! if a teacher fails me ill fuck her in the ass

A colleague of mind is a professor at FSU - I'll alert him to your presence. :rolleyes:
 
I love essay exams. If Calculus had an essay exam, perhaps I would have passed it the first time.
 
Essays are easy.

Exposition
Example
Explanation

Works every time.

Thesis. Example (evidence, quote, paraphrase). Explain how the example proves the thesis.

Colin Powell has a funny expression on his face when he stands next to Dubya. Looking at the reviews from the latest speech from the Prez on most major news networks, Colin Powell looked like he just ate bad liver whenever the Prez mentioned his name. Simply put, Colin Powell will have an expression of distaste on his face whenever he's forced to stand on a podium next to the Shrub during a speech.

A real yawner, but academics love it.

:D
 
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