Online relationships.

[Guest]

I am a regular here but to shy to post under my own name.

Those of you that have found true love online how did you know it was love without meeting the person face to face? How did you know that it was not just some fantasy that can happen through chatting to someone online? How do you sort a fantasy and the real thing to know you are in love?

 

[InnocentAngel81]

it didnt take much time after we met in person after five months of talking

 

[mistressastra]

I met my hubby through snail mail, and I didn't know him at all. He hid his true self from me. I figure online, it could be worse. How do you know whom you are talking to? I also met a man I thought I loved and we had some hot times ONLINE but that ended and when I did meet him, nothing, zip, no chemistry. I didn't even like the way he smelled. So yes the whole thing can be a fantasy which is fine if you think of it that way.

BTW I do someone who met her hubby online, last I heard they were quite happy.

 

[mistressastra]

LOL that's ...do KNOW someone ;-) and they worked out. So don't lose hope. It can work out.

BTW why do guys always say "I am not an axe murderer you know!" LOL Like if you were, you'd admit it???

 

[Guest]

Meeting someone online is actually BETTER for a relationship than meeting them in person.

I know, this sounds strange right?? Well, I beleive it. Before I go on I guess I should tell you that I met my wife on IRC some six years ago. We've been married now for almost five years.

Now to answer the question, I met my wife in a chat room on IRC. I played the chivalrous knight and came to her protection against some idiot 14 year old who was annoying the hell out of her at the time. I was new on IRC and to the internet and to shy to actually message her. BUT luckily, she PM'd me. I had fought off the 14 year old, I was 27 at the time, he left, things went quiet, so I left. She PM'd me and we started talking. We spent two weeks talking online. We talked about EVERYTHING. Our families. Our life stories. Our likes, dislikes. Past relationships. Everything.

Luckily, we only lived 200 miles apart. We arranged to meet halfway. I took one look at her and fell hard! Apparently, she felt the same. I ENCOURAGED her to bring along an escort/chaperone to make sure I was "OKay." She did. Her parents came along.

At the time, she was a few months shy of 18. (Sidenote: I was not robbing the cradle. When we started talking, she told me she was 19. I didn't find out her real age until just a few days before we met. If I had known her real age, I probably wouldn't have kept talking to her.)

We met and spent the day together. Bowling, lunch, walking around the mall, checking out her great tits inside that tight white sweater.. sorry, I digress.

The point is, by the time I came to her hometown, a week after we first met, we already knew everything there was to know about each other. Past relationships, how many children we each wanted. We even argued about kids names online. (We don't have any kids yet) We knew each other inside and out. It worked out wonderfully. Don't be afraid of meeting online people In Real life. Talk to them for a while, learn about them. You have nothing else to do. It's a good way to get your partner(?) to listen. Why wouldn't they listen, they're sitting there staring at a moniter!!!! Get to know them. Talk to them. Listen to them. IT's a great way to find out about your possible partner and find out about them.

 

[Guest]

Luckily, we only lived 200 miles apart. We arranged to meet halfway. I took one look at her and fell hard!

But what happens when you have thousands of miles between you both. It is a big step to take to meet. How does one figure out from fantasy and love?

With only 200 miles you can have coffee and see if there is the sparks there, if not your drive home. How can you tell if what you have online and via the telephone will still have those sparks without spending hundreds of dollars on flights, to find it was based on fantasy not love.

 

[lavender]

 

[Guest]

Would the time spent be fun if there was no sex involved?

Yes we could, we both enjoy the same things to do in free time and he would be a friend as we share the same morals in life and laugh at the same things. We would both sit quite easily in the worlds we are in now.

The sexual side is amazing also.

 

[Smiley777]

All of you might wish to check out the Long Distance Relationships thread in the Personals section of the board. Some of the same topics in there, and a nice support group for those tough questions.

 

[SweetCherry]

Toshy, feel free to PM me on this and I'll give you the insight on this I can offer. Draco and I have been going strong for over a year and a half now and we're 15 thousand miles apart.

 

[BustyTheClown]

I'm in a similar boat to Draco -- I met my SO online 3 years ago, and we've been going strong for 2 1/2 years (after 6 months of getting to know each other and making sure we were serious). Feel free to PM me as well, and I can try to answer any questions you have to the best of my ability.

 

[lovetoread]

I knew it was love, when he would im me while at work,with no sex talk.

But its not something that anyone can tell you about.

You have to meet in R/L to know its love.

I knew I could love Tiger after we got together online. But I didnt know I was "in love" with him until we met in person.

I agree with the recommendation of going to the LDR thread. They are the best bunch of people who support and know what you are going through.

Edited to admit that I too,went to live with a fellow Lit person. Its something that must be taken very seriously though.

 

[riff]

Base it on friendship then. Friendship transfers normally, if it's genuine and strong. If it's all based upon some premise of "love" or "infatuation" you might have issues.

I think maybe you should reassess the way you are conducting yourself. Think about it this way: Would the time spent be fun if there was no sex involved? Could the two of you just shoot the shit and play around without any type of sexual connection and still have a great time? If not, I think you are looking at net relationships with a more fantastical viewpoint.

Baby, your enchilada stuffing is coming out the sides!

 

[craigiebaby]

My daughter is dating somebody she met on line and it all seems to be going well.....

 

[Skibum]

I moved from Vermont to California to be with someone I met here at Literotica. We are happy, but I do urge caution. There are unscrupulous people out there who would do you harm. Get to know each other before you take irreversable steps.

 

[Guest]

Thanks for your comments everyone.

Anyone else got something to say, feel free to do so.