Online relationships.....

[TN_Vixen]

This isn't an insipid thread about the "love of your life" or anything like that.. it is simply a quest to learn about how those of you/us have dealt with connecting to a person online and how you attempted a follow-through (if any) of that connection.

SINGLES:
do you find yourself connecting, hoping, meeting people online will further your chance for intimate relationships or is your online behavior simply a source for venting your intimate feelings and emotions to help you place things into perspective?

MARRIED:
Is flirting a way to escape an unsatisfying relationship or is it a way to simply rejuvinate your sex life with your partner?

 

[Xander]

You know Vixen, I do talk to quite a few people online, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't care for them.
Now, first and foremost. I am their friend, and that I'll always be. However no one can really say if there will be something else.
yes being online do allow me to express feelings and words that I would be denied to IRL.
And it's nice to feel appreciated without getting "The Look". you know that measuring look that'll determin if you're worthy to be allowed to talk to the girl.

I have absolutely no idea, if I'll ever have another true loving relationship, spawned from the net. I simply dont know.
When it all comes down to it. I guess you could say that, it will be seen when people actually meet.
There's no way of really knowing before that.

 

[Matthew D]

Depends on how both partners or friends take the flirting and other things that go into relationship building. If both people are just in it for fun, then it can be a way of spicing up things in a marriage for both. But when one person is in a bad relationship, it can become a little bit harder to draw the line between just fun and serious emotion things. These things need to be communicated between each of the people involved at least I think so. Just like any good and fun relationship IRL you need to be able to talk to the other person and tell them what is going on with you and what you want. For me above all, I am just looking to make good friends...

Now with that said, I have made a few good friends online, and I think of them just like friends I have IRL but they are just in different and far flung places. I hope that they think of me in the same way. Yes, it would be nice to connect in a normal way like sitting down to a nice cup of coffee or a Coke with them but in most cases it will probably never happen.

 

[Ticklish Girl]

SINGLES:
do you find yourself connecting, hoping, meeting people online will further your chance for intimate relationships or is your online behavior simply a source for venting your intimate feelings and emotions to help you place things into perspective?

I'd say it's a little of both. I've had two very intense online relationships that looked promising, but they fell apart before we could set up any RL meetings. I won't give up hope that an online relationship can blossom into an RL relationship.

As for the second point, I have explored fantasies and behaviors online that I would never dream of trying IRL (or at the very least, I'd be nervous about trying them). I've been the mistress, I've been the slave, I've been a merciless cocktease, I've been with other women. This is unbelievably thrilling and liberating for me, because I grew up very sheltered. These partners fall into the category of "friends." I have a lot of affection for them, and I even entertain thoughts of meeting some of them, but I don't have the intense emotional connection that I've felt with my serious online relationships. I just enjoy exploring these facets of my sexuality with minimal risk.

 

[Guest]

I am married and my husband likes to hear about me tempting other men, it is a turn on for him. I even have a special friend who we both know in real life that does not know it is really me he has been talking with. It is a HUGE turn on for me ... seeing him in real life is fun, I know what to wear and things to do that turn him on because he has told the secret online me. It tempts him so much but he considers me "off limits" with him being a friend of my husband. I try my best to be a seductive as possible whenever I am around him and it drives him WILD!!! Little does he know I am the one who sends him links to porn photo's nearly every day and we talk about what turns us on in the photos. I adore this man for what I have shared with him, seeing him now makes me feel so sexy and naughty. I have and will continue to enjoy this hot relationship.

 

[willywanker]

I am married and while things are not really good on that front now, I'm still not sure I'll ever really meet the person I talk to most on line. When I first started to come into the chat room, I was afraid to even think or consider an on-line relationship. I've heard all the horror stories about real life relationships being broken up my on-line ones.

That being said, it has been wonderful to have a lady friend on line I could tell about all the problems at home and share some tender moments with. My typing is slow so we moved to the telephone and if we were not seperated by the rest of the country, I probably would have met her sometime when I really felt down. But just like real life relationships, it takes work to keep things going smooth. Hurt feelings for a slight in the chat room cooled things off til fences could me mended and the relationship is stronger for it. I write in several threads at a time on the sexual role playing board, but just as in real life, I have only one real relationship on line. Boring and monogamous, oh well.

 

[Guest]

Interesting thought...

 

[Guru]

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[Coltrane]

flirting, or play, can be many things

Being married, I’ll answer that question first and then take a shot at the other one.

I think flirting can actual be both an escape from an unsatisfying relationship and a way to put some new life into a person’s marriage.

A marriage may be good and satisfying on many levels but yet have voids or empty spaces that flirting serves to fill. And, I do believe, that flirting might make the flirter a happier person and therefore a better marital partner. In the end, it’s for the individual to decide. Privacy is an individual right, to my way of thinking, even in marriage. There are areas in my wife’s life that I consider to be hers. I feel the same for myself.

As for singles, I think there is a lot of searching and hoping, and maybe those feeling do skew the encounters they may have. But it is often no different in r/t than it is in v/t. If a person is measuring everyone they become involved with by the “is he or she marriage material or a marriage candidate,” then I think a person misses out on the “just having fun” things.

 

[livin_simple]

Interesting question Vixen.
I'm answering as a single.
My work is rather demanding at times....ok, more often than not. This is a place where I can take a break and somewhat interact with other people. I say somewhat interact because I'm on so little that I really don't have friendships established with some of the more regular people and the posts/threads accumulate and move so fast that the best I can do is skim through the most recent stuff and put in a bit here and there.
I decided long ago that my persona on the net or in email will simply be myself. If a relationship moves to a real life meeting, there would be no surprises with the other person. This transition to RL contact has happened once, about a year ago. I'm not hunting for something that would transition into RL, but also not opposed if something would develop. The hardest part is the realities imposed by geography.
Not sure if this really answered your question.
We engineers, sometimes have to work at understanding that what's and why's of what's going on inside our heads.

 

[WriterDom]

I've met maybe 50 or 60 women in person in the last 4 years from online. Sandwiched in there somewhere was a year and a half relationship where I was not seeing anyone else. Never met a Literotica member tho.

 

[Nobody Special's wife]

Me an the Hubby met online...talked for about a month or so and then moved in together and then so on ect. ect.


it was love what can I say I was just lucky I guess