On writing sex scenes, how much detail is too much?

[jacks4u]

I'm fairly new to writing Erotic fiction, and paused when I realized that I'd just written almost 700 words, and was only 1/3 the way through a scene, a threesome with 2 strait chicks and a lesbian 'guide'.

Should sex scenes be short, concise. Or long, with every movement, every caress, kiss, nibble or stroke documented? Give an example ot too much detail, or not enough, to illustrate your point.


Thanks,

Jacks

 

[oggbashan]

I'm fairly new to writing Erotic fiction, and paused when I realized that I'd just written almost 700 words, and was only 1/3 the way through a scene, a threesome with 2 strait chicks and a lesbian 'guide'.

Should sex scenes be short, concise. Or long, with every movement, every caress, kiss, nibble or stroke documented? Give an example ot too much detail, or not enough, to illustrate your point.


Thanks,

Jacks

Short, concise is good.

Long, detailed is also good.

Depends what you mean by short and long. 700 words for a third, therefore 2,100 words for the whole, is still short.

Examples? Look at the Top Lists for each category. Short, long, sexual scenes with no story, stories with incidental sex - all can work. It depends on the writing.

Og

 

[English Lady]

It depends what the story calls for. I don't know a precise word count but in a story I recently wrote (ended up around 16k in length) one of the sex scenes spanned around 6k of that.

I was going for a long, drawn out tease. Another one is around 12k long and is pretty much one long sex scene and one little sex scene.

I'm generally long winded. *grins* I wrote Erotic romance more often than not and romance tends to take up a fair number of words.

 

[SevenOfSpade]

Well for me, I always try to maintain at least if possible, one third of my stories having sex scenes out of the total word count.

I think that most people on Lit would prefer a detailed sex scene, but its just my opinion, so don't put your money on it. But it all depends on the mood and settings i guess.

Personally, I prefer a story where there is detailed sex compared to a story which has little details.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

In my opinion, the thing that makes sexy writing is sexy is not so much what the people do, but what they feel. Getting a blow job, or a kiss, or anal sex, or anything else, is hot because of what that act says about the relationship and feelings between the two people.

Fiction--any fiction--is about expressing emotion in terms of action. Therefore it's more compelling and to the point to say something like, "He kissed her neck, her throat, his kisses hungry, blind, and full of urgent need," than it is to say, "he kissed her under the chin. Then he kissed her a little further down. Then he kissed her again but more on her throat now..." because the first one gives us some idea of the emotion he's feeling whereas the second is just a list of actions.

The bad porn I read--and I seem to read a lot of it--is bad because it's emotionally neutral. Cocks slide into pussies, parts are licked and sucked, people contort into all sorts of positions--all without any evidence of emotion or human connection.

So don't worry about the word count. Worry about showing what they're feeling.

 

[English Lady]

In my opinion, the thing that makes sexy writing is sexy is not so much what the people do, but what they feel. Getting a blow job, or a kiss, or anal sex, or anything else, is hot because of what that act says about the relationship and feelings between the two people.

Fiction--any fiction--is about expressing emotion in terms of action. Therefore it's more compelling and to the point to say something like, "He kissed her neck, her throat, his kisses hungry, blind, and full of urgent need," than it is to say, "he kissed her under the chin. Then he kissed her a little further down. Then he kissed her again but more on her throat now..." because the first one gives us some idea of the emotion he's feeling whereas the second is just a list of actions.

The bad porn I read--and I seem to read a lot of it--is bad because it's emotionally neutral. Cocks slide into pussies, parts are licked and sucked, people contort into all sorts of positions--all without any evidence of emotion or human connection.

So don't worry about the word count. Worry about showing what they're feeling.

No wonder I you so very much. Emotion is what matters.

 

[polynices]

I agree with all of the above - length of scene depends entirely on the scene and what you're trying to do with it. Sometimes close, comprehensive detail is arousing, even when it goes on for a long, long time, but sometimes selective detail works better - i.e. foregrounding a particular moment or gesture or caress rather than giving the complete blow by blow account. And - as Dr Mabeuse says - feeling has to be a major part of the mix. Mechanical sex is just mechanical - I know, I've written some. It's emotional context that really makes a sex scene, I think, because the context decides the significance of the particular sex act. And context presupposes characters, of course, and characters presuppose personal history ... And so on.

I'd also add a tentative rule of thumb: if the scene you're writing excites you in some way, then it will probably work - at least for some readers. If the writing doesn't excite you, the writer, then there's a very good chance it won't work for anybody else. So the simple answer is: write what excites you and don't worry how many words that takes. And - maybe - stop writing the scene when you're no longer interested in it yourself.

(Incidentally, reading that back I find I sound as if I know all this for sure - as if I'm an expert. I don't and I'm not. But it is the way I think at the moment, at least.)

- polynices

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I'm reading a new neurology book; its a revelation about how our brains process. And so I now think it doesnt much matter how you cobble a story together, all that matters is impressing the right people.

Write to suit yourself.

 

[NoJo]

a threesome with 2 strait chicks and a lesbian 'guide'.

Strait chicks? I love chicks from Gibraltar.

Anyway, a good rule of thumb is to keep writing the sex scene until you cum, then write some actual story while your cock is flaccid. Repeat up to five times.

 

[driphoney]

In my opinion, the thing that makes sexy writing is sexy is not so much what the people do, but what they feel. Getting a blow job, or a kiss, or anal sex, or anything else, is hot because of what that act says about the relationship and feelings between the two people.

Fiction--any fiction--is about expressing emotion in terms of action. Therefore it's more compelling and to the point to say something like, "He kissed her neck, her throat, his kisses hungry, blind, and full of urgent need," than it is to say, "he kissed her under the chin. Then he kissed her a little further down. Then he kissed her again but more on her throat now..." because the first one gives us some idea of the emotion he's feeling whereas the second is just a list of actions.

The bad porn I read--and I seem to read a lot of it--is bad because it's emotionally neutral. Cocks slide into pussies, parts are licked and sucked, people contort into all sorts of positions--all without any evidence of emotion or human connection.

So don't worry about the word count. Worry about showing what they're feeling.

I think finding a way to describe those feelings and inner thoughts is hard. Is it The Earl, in his How To that calls what you're describing in your second example as "play-by-play"? When I read that, it instantly gave me a way of looking at my sex scenes. I still fall into "play-by-play", and have trouble conveying the emotion, but at least I can see it now.

I guess if I ever have someone finally write to me and say, "I had an orgasm reading your story", I'll know I've finally gotten closer to creating the emotion I wish to bring in my story.

Also, as a reader, I don't find that there is usually too much detail, rather too little in most erotica writing. I'll zip through five or six pages of a well-done piece and not even notice.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I think finding a way to describe those feelings and inner thoughts is hard. Is it The Earl, in his How To that calls what you're describing in your second example as "play-by-play"? When I read that, it instantly gave me a way of looking at my sex scenes. I still fall into "play-by-play", and have trouble conveying the emotion, but at least I can see it now.

I guess if I ever have someone finally write to me and say, "I had an orgasm reading your story", I'll know I've finally gotten closer to creating the emotion I wish to bring in my story.

Also, as a reader, I don't find that there is usually too much detail, rather too little in most erotica writing. I'll zip through five or six pages of a well-done piece and not even notice.

But there are people incapable of emotion, and people who react strongly to almost nuthin. Meaningless flattery may work for you but its no measure of your story.

 

[Bianca_Sommerland]

It depends on the story. I forget where I read it...I think it was an erotic writers blog...but a sex scene is simply another action scene. Treat it like one and the length will come. That's how I work it anyway. An all out brawl can be emotional or highly played out too, depending on what comes before and after.

 

[driphoney]

But there are people incapable of emotion, and people who react strongly to almost nuthin. Meaningless flattery may work for you but its no measure of your story.

Why would it be meaningless if they meant it? Flattery connotes a falsely given compliment. I don't find that to be the norm around here except sometimes where friends praise friends. While I won't beat up another writer in a public comments section, I personally, never say something I don't mean. However, most of the readers here are not writers and probably don't have the writer's feelings as their foremost concern.

Improving how I write a sex scene is something I've been working of, it's something I give thought to. I really don't have any way to measure any improvement except by feedback from other erotica writers who are good at it, and responses I might get from readers. How do you do it? (It's a sincere question.)

 

[Handley_Page]

In my opinion, the thing that makes sexy writing is sexy is not so much what the people do, but what they feel. Getting a blow job, or a kiss, or anal sex, or anything else, is hot because of what that act says about the relationship and feelings between the two people.

Fiction--any fiction--is about expressing emotion in terms of action. Therefore it's more compelling and to the point to say something like, "He kissed her neck, her throat, his kisses hungry, blind, and full of urgent need," than it is to say, "he kissed her under the chin. Then he kissed her a little further down. Then he kissed her again but more on her throat now..." because the first one gives us some idea of the emotion he's feeling whereas the second is just a list of actions.

The bad porn I read--and I seem to read a lot of it--is bad because it's emotionally neutral. Cocks slide into pussies, parts are licked and sucked, people contort into all sorts of positions--all without any evidence of emotion or human connection.

So don't worry about the word count. Worry about showing what they're feeling.

The most constructive and help ful hint I think I've seen
Thank you.

 

[Stella_Omega]

One of the writers I edit brought me an orgy scene that read like a football play-by-play. She wanted to keep track of every character every moment.

The trick was, to find the main plot point in that orgy, and figure out who the main character was, and let the rest fade into the background a bit. The scene was about a third less words-- and more of those were cum-producing..

 

[cinereaheath]

In my opinion, the thing that makes sexy writing is sexy is not so much what the people do, but what they feel. Getting a blow job, or a kiss, or anal sex, or anything else, is hot because of what that act says about the relationship and feelings between the two people.

Fiction--any fiction--is about expressing emotion in terms of action. Therefore it's more compelling and to the point to say something like, "He kissed her neck, her throat, his kisses hungry, blind, and full of urgent need," than it is to say, "he kissed her under the chin. Then he kissed her a little further down. Then he kissed her again but more on her throat now..." because the first one gives us some idea of the emotion he's feeling whereas the second is just a list of actions.

The bad porn I read--and I seem to read a lot of it--is bad because it's emotionally neutral. Cocks slide into pussies, parts are licked and sucked, people contort into all sorts of positions--all without any evidence of emotion or human connection.

So don't worry about the word count. Worry about showing what they're feeling.

.... what he said!

 

[CWatson]

Let me elaborate on something that was touched upon already:

There are, roughly, two kinds of sex stories out there. One revolves exclusively around the depiction of the sexual act; we'll call these "stroke stories" because that's what you're supposed to do when you read it. The other is a story with plot, characters and also sex; these (to my knowledge) don't have a name yet. But, essentially, one is pornography and one is erotica. One seeks to tell a story, the other to arouse and titillate.

The reason this applies to you is this: the amount of word-count your sex scene should take up depends on which kind of story you're writing. Which is more important: the sex or the characters/plot/build-up? I mean, I've seen stories--good ones, well-deserving of a high rating--that were 100% sex and nothing else. And, obviously, bookstores are full of stories that are 100% not sex (or at least non-graphic depictions thereof). Both ways work; and every way in between works.

Long story short: there is no magic "formula" of "there should be [X]% sex and [X]% plot". It depends on the story itself. So ask yourself what the story's about, and go from there.

 

[jacks4u]

In my opinion, the thing that makes sexy writing is sexy is not so much what the people do, but what they feel. Getting a blow job, or a kiss, or anal sex, or anything else, is hot because of what that act says about the relationship and feelings between the two people.

That's what's wrong with my story! I was writing a major sex scene, and it just seemed to drag on and on... then I read it back, no idea why I had a flat response to it. Was it the detail (X inserted tab B into slot A...)? or something else completely?

Fiction--any fiction--is about expressing emotion in terms of action. Therefore it's more compelling and to the point to say something like, "He kissed her neck, her throat, his kisses hungry, blind, and full of urgent need," than it is to say, "he kissed her under the chin. Then he kissed her a little further down. Then he kissed her again but more on her throat now..." because the first one gives us some idea of the emotion he's feeling whereas the second is just a list of actions.

Now that I look at it in emotional terms, what could be a really emotionally charged story about two [strait] chicks that go trick or treating as 'Lesbians', is in fact emotionally neutral. In this one scene, especially, where one gal is ravished by the other two, she just lays there like so many pounds of dead fish...

The bad porn I read--and I seem to read a lot of it--is bad because it's emotionally neutral. Cocks slide into pussies, parts are licked and sucked, people contort into all sorts of positions--all without any evidence of emotion or human connection.

So don't worry about the word count. Worry about showing what they're feeling.

I guess the real question for a straight white guy with limited sexual experiences (societal norms mostly) is, what do I know about how one woman feels when another unexpectedly feels her up. Extrapolation doesn't work there, because guys and gals don't think quite alike, or have similar emotional responses. I guess I'll just have to fake it, and see what happens...

One thing's for certain - I'll miss the deadline for the 'Halloween contest' but I could save it up for next year...


Dr. M,

Thank you sooo much for pointing the way...

Jacks

 

[Stella_Omega]

That's what's wrong with my story! I was writing a major sex scene, and it just seemed to drag on and on... then I read it back, no idea why I had a flat response to it. Was it the detail (X inserted tab B into slot A...)? or something else completely?


Now that I look at it in emotional terms, what could be a really emotionally charged story about two [strait] chicks that go trick or treating as 'Lesbians', is in fact emotionally neutral. In this one scene, especially, where one gal is ravished by the other two, she just lays there like so many pounds of dead fish...



One thing's for certain - I'll miss the deadline for the 'Halloween contest' but I could save it up for next year...


Dr. M,

Thank you sooo much for pointing the way...

Jacks

See, that's the real problem-- writing emotionally charged takes so much more effort than writing tabs and slots...


Good for you, Jacks

 

[jacks4u]

Anyway, a good rule of thumb is to keep writing the sex scene until you cum, then write some actual story while your cock is flaccid. Repeat up to five times.

Lol! but the problem is, this scene seems to lack 'firmness'. And I just couldn't seem to figure out why.

 

[jacks4u]

See, that's the real problem-- writing emotionally charged takes so much more effort than writing tabs and slots...

Yes, but I want to write 'good' and now that I think about it, all the good stories I've written were so emotionally charged. some to the point that the actual tab A/ slot B parts blended into obscurity, but the sex was so good, so erotic, I wanted to smoke a cigarette after...


So now, back to the text editor... or 'mv /my/story /dev/null' (into the bit bucket...)


And, as DH pointed out, there seems to be something here that could benefit other new authors, or re-focus more experienced ones that seem to be having problems...

and Thanks to all for the great comments, even JBJ's about the emotional extremists among us all.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

I'm fairly new to writing Erotic fiction, and paused when I realized that I'd just written almost 700 words, and was only 1/3 the way through a scene, a threesome with 2 strait chicks and a lesbian 'guide'.

Should sex scenes be short, concise. Or long, with every movement, every caress, kiss, nibble or stroke documented? Give an example ot too much detail, or not enough, to illustrate your point.


Thanks,

Jacks

My personal view is, it all depends - not much help, eh?

First, a blow by blow account is like a radio commentary of a basketball game andis about about as erotic as a limp cucumber.

Like every facet of fiction writing, you have to know what you're trying to achieve with a scene. Sometimes you're looking for a sensory experience, where fingers drawing over sensitive areas lead to warm bodies finding love.

Other times you need the pulsating urgency of violent coupling to assuage the passions that have arisen from crime/violence/ inhibitions let loose.

Then there are the soft seduction scenes where one or other parther inveigles the other into bed.

Whatever the scenario, the most important point for a writer is to avoid a blow for blow account and describe (with dialogue) the emotions - and squishy fluids - that are going on. This isn't two dimensional video. Written stroke is not the same as DVD stroke.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Yes, but I want to write 'good' and now that I think about it, all the good stories I've written were so emotionally charged. some to the point that the actual tab A/ slot B parts blended into obscurity, but the sex was so good, so erotic, I wanted to smoke a cigarette after...


So now, back to the text editor... or 'mv /my/story /dev/null' (into the bit bucket...)


And, as DH pointed out, there seems to be something here that could benefit other new authors, or re-focus more experienced ones that seem to be having problems...

and Thanks to all for the great comments, even JBJ's about the emotional extremists among us all.

That's the difference between erotica and porn.

Dr M's comment should be framed and hung on the wall.

 

[jacks4u]

That's the difference between erotica and porn.

Dr M's comment should be framed and hung on the wall.

Perhaps AH_Librarian could afix it to the wall? I know I''ll keep a link to this thread around for quite some time...

 

[CrimsonMaiden]

Perhaps AH_Librarian could afix it to the wall? I know I''ll keep a link to this thread around for quite some time...

I can do that. (Well, the whole thread will go in there, lol. I'll get it added sometime today as long as I don't forget. I have a reminder in my pm box, so it will be easy for me to find it again.)