Older men and premature ejaculation

[henharrier]

After years of abstinence (for both of us), I've recently started having sex with a longtime girlfriend. Helen is a 64 year old divorcee and I am a 71 year old widower. We've been loving but platonic friends for several years now and enjoy spending time together. We have many common interests but live separately in neighbouring towns. We have stayed over in each other's homes on occasions, and have even enjoyed vacations together (in separate hotel rooms).

Though we have often kissed and cuddled, we hadn't taken it any further (for reasons I outlined in a previous thread) until recently. Three weeks ago I found myself in an unexpected situation with Helen, where close physical intimacy and penetrative sex finally became a reality for us. It was passionate, it was delicious, it was exciting, but it was quick - way too quick! After minimal foreplay, I entered her from behind (we were standing in the shower) but after only a few vigorous thrusts, I ejaculated deep into her vagina. I put it down to the excitement and suddenness of the occasion and we both laughed it off. Since then though we've had sex several times but my premature ejaculation seems to have persisted.

I'm in good health, and reasonably fit for my age and though my penis isn't particularly big, I can easily achieve, and maintain, a fairly firm erection given appropriate stimulation. I haven't had to resort to any blue pills - yet. During extended periods of foreplay when Helen plays with my cock I don't ejaculate. When she sucks my cock I can usually avoid ejaculation if I want. When I rub my cock against Helen's arse, or between her breasts I don't ejaculate even though it’s very exciting. However when I actually penetrate her from whatever position, I come very quickly.

Like many mature women Helen suffers from vaginal dryness and uses Durex Perfect Glide as a lubricant. I wonder if the effect of that on my cock is contributing to my premature ejaculation? Perhaps wearing a condom would help? Perhaps its just the excitement of making love again with a new and very sexy partner and I haven't got used to it yet - after all we've only been fucking for 3 weeks.

The good news is that we're very much in love and despite my shortcomings, are enjoying sex together. Lots of relaxing cuddles and kisses, long periods of foreplay and oral during which Helen will usually have an orgasm. Our sessions culminate with us quickly fucking in one or other of our favourite positions. I can stay hard for a little while after I come but the magic moment will have passed all to soon. Helen insists she is content with our current sex life but I know she would like us to have an orgasm together while I'm hard inside her.

Any other older guys in a similar situation with premature ejaculation?

 

[StrongMaster7]

In my mid-60s, I do not have that issue, but your situation reminds me of the only period when I did come too fast.

In my early 20s, I had a long ‘dry spell’ and when I finally got the chance to fuck again, it was with a girl all my friends and I had lusted over for years. I was three pumps and done. Thankfully, she laughed it off and took it as a compliment. After three or four times coming too fast, I was able to relax and last as long as I wanted again.

A few years before that I was with a girl that I didn’t really like that much, but she had a pretty hoy body and wanted to fuck, so I fucked her. She wasn’t much for foreplay or oral, so I shoved it in pretty much as soon as we were naked. I blew my wad in a couple of pumps. She was obviously not happy, but I was happy to get out of there. Never saw her again.

 

[jedclampet69]

I'm 63 and if anything I last to long

 

[nakedginger]

I am with an older gentleman (72) and it seems to be the opposite problem. However, we worked at it and found mental relaxation, taking my time and no pressure sermed to work well. Maybe the same will work for you. Concentrate on relaxation and just playing with no pressure and see wjat happens. A lot is in the mind.

 

[Shaglus_Ziegler]

Some ladies find it sexy.

 

[MaturemanAJ]

I can control it by switching things up ie stopping before you lose control and do something different.
Some women don't want extended periods as hips, knees and so on start to hurt.
There is a lot of body to cover so go find her other trigger points and go back.
I agree though condoms, numbsit I think it's called for tooth pain can help but remember it numbs her too.

 

[NancyPan]

I suspect that the “problem” is related to (as you suggest) the absolute pleasure and excitement of penetration. I think it is very possible that as time goes on you will be able to last longer. However, in the meantime, if she is amenable to this, perhaps it is best that you provide her orgasm through oral worship prior to your penetration so that your spurt is less of an issue.

BTW, the problem of PE can be compounded by worrying about it.

I do envy you. My wife stopped allowing me PIV sex in our FLR many years ago. My PE was one of the reasons. My small size another, but largely, she orgasms EVERY time from oral worship and she decided that it was not good for me or our relationship for me to orgasm too often(more than once every two weeks). If I’m allowed to penetrate, she can’t (I can’t) stop it from spurting.

 

[henharrier]

Good news!
My premature ejaculation fears were short lived it seems.

Helen and I have met several times since my previous post and have been enjoying regular sex. I stayed over at hers on Saturday and we had a quickie on her bed shortly after I arrived. There wasn’t much foreplay before we fucked. Edge of bed, partly clothed - big knickers eased to the side, missionary. I lasted about 3 minutes which was longer than our previous encounters. No orgasm for Helen though.

After an afternoon pottering around in her garden we went indoors for a nice dinner. Later we took our wine out to the secluded garden and sat on a bench to enjoy the cool evening air. As darkness fell we kissed and cuddled before Helen whispered that she wanted to fuck again - outdoors. She moved over to the picnic table, lifted her dress provocatively, bent over the table and ordered me to fuck her there and then. She was wearing the same loose (damp!) panties she had on earlier so access to her pussy from behind was relatively easy. Her vagina was well lubricated - probably from our earlier exertions - and my cock slipped easily into her. We fucked vigorously and with my fingers gently teasing her clitoris, she yelped, trembled and orgasmed magnificently after about 5 minutes. I finished just after her. As I withdrew from her and my cum dribbled out, I dipped my thumb into the mess and pressed it against her arsehole. Her reaction was to gasp in surprise before she thrust her bum backwards onto my thumb. A moment later she groaned, gave a shudder and orgasmed again. Wow! That was so unexpected - but lovely!

Later when we went to bed, tired and drained, we kissed and hugged before falling asleep in each others arms. Next morning we made love slowly and passionately and I managed to last as long as I needed.

Helen has now suggested that she would like to try anal sex, something she never did with her ex husband. I’m ok with the idea but I’ve never done it either. Hopefully it will work out for us. Any advice for elderly anal virgins?

All is well with us oldies!

 

[PersonalFavors]

After years of abstinence (for both of us), I've recently started having sex with a longtime girlfriend. Helen is a 64 year old divorcee and I am a 71 year old widower. We've been loving but platonic friends for several years now and enjoy spending time together. We have many common interests but live separately in neighbouring towns. We have stayed over in each other's homes on occasions, and have even enjoyed vacations together (in separate hotel rooms).

Though we have often kissed and cuddled, we hadn't taken it any further (for reasons I outlined in a previous thread) until recently. Three weeks ago I found myself in an unexpected situation with Helen, where close physical intimacy and penetrative sex finally became a reality for us. It was passionate, it was delicious, it was exciting, but it was quick - way too quick! After minimal foreplay, I entered her from behind (we were standing in the shower) but after only a few vigorous thrusts, I ejaculated deep into her vagina. I put it down to the excitement and suddenness of the occasion and we both laughed it off. Since then though we've had sex several times but my premature ejaculation seems to have persisted.

I'm in good health, and reasonably fit for my age and though my penis isn't particularly big, I can easily achieve, and maintain, a fairly firm erection given appropriate stimulation. I haven't had to resort to any blue pills - yet. During extended periods of foreplay when Helen plays with my cock I don't ejaculate. When she sucks my cock I can usually avoid ejaculation if I want. When I rub my cock against Helen's arse, or between her breasts I don't ejaculate even though it’s very exciting. However when I actually penetrate her from whatever position, I come very quickly.

Like many mature women Helen suffers from vaginal dryness and uses Durex Perfect Glide as a lubricant. I wonder if the effect of that on my cock is contributing to my premature ejaculation? Perhaps wearing a condom would help? Perhaps its just the excitement of making love again with a new and very sexy partner and I haven't got used to it yet - after all we've only been fucking for 3 weeks.

The good news is that we're very much in love and despite my shortcomings, are enjoying sex together. Lots of relaxing cuddles and kisses, long periods of foreplay and oral during which Helen will usually have an orgasm. Our sessions culminate with us quickly fucking in one or other of our favourite positions. I can stay hard for a little while after I come but the magic moment will have passed all to soon. Helen insists she is content with our current sex life but I know she would like us to have an orgasm together while I'm hard inside her.

Any other older guys in a similar situation with premature ejaculation?

Kegals. Look up pelvic floor exorcises for men. Mayo Clinic and Cincinnati U both have great tutorials on the exorcises you need and the proper way to do them.
Also for both your comfort stay away from the silicone lubricants. Water based are better but may not last as long. I like fun with coconut oil too. Give her a massage. She will love you for it. A little pricey but a better one that mixes well with water jobaba or neutrogena skin oil is Nutiva Virgin Coconut Oil.

 

[Jerrybi]

I am now 70 and have often had that problem but since i went on cialis and have a rock hard cock i seem to last longer. She often cums a few times before me.

When have early morning sex and i haven't had a pill for 4 or more days i ejaculate quickly with a softish cock.

My wife laughs and tells me to take a pill and finish her off later.