ok you female subs

[Shadowsdream]

you didn't really think it was all about the boys did you?

Lets begin this conversation talking about cold eyes.

If you are an owned sub or slave how do you feel and react to the coldness in your Dominants eyes when you suspect that coldness has something to do with you or your behaviour?

If you are a submissive that hopes to be under the thumb of a Dominant at some time...how do you "imagine" these cold eyes would affect you. ( or is that effect language nazi's?)

Anyone care to join this inquisitive Mistress?

 

[princess4u]

as an owned sub...

i have not had that experience with my present dom -
but speaking from a prior experience:

seeing coldness in his eyes and knowing (or thinking) that
my behavior had caused it, elicited a very empty feeling in my heart
and soul - it was like all the happiness and fulfillment i found in being his,
was just totally sucked away from me and i was left as a barren field -
knowing (or thinking) that i had failed him was excruiatingly painful for me

 

[Kajira Callista]

you didn't really think it was all about the boys did you?

Lets begin this conversation talking about cold eyes.

If you are an owned sub or slave how do you feel and react to the coldness in your Dominants eyes when you suspect that coldness has something to do with you or your behaviour?

If you are a submissive that hopes to be under the thumb of a Dominant at some time...how do you "imagine" these cold eyes would affect you. ( or is that effect language nazi's?)

Anyone care to join this inquisitive Mistress?

Cold eyes or shortness in a dominants tone make me crumble. Imagine shakey, breaking out in a sweat, sick to her stomach, mind going a mile a min to figure out what she did wrong, wided eyes filling with tears. That would be my reaction.

 

[Shadowsdream]

i have not had that experience with my present dom -
but speaking from a prior experience:

seeing coldness in his eyes and knowing (or thinking) that
my behavior had caused it, elicited a very empty feeling in my heart
and soul - it was like all the happiness and fulfillment i found in being his,
was just totally sucked away from me and i was left as a barren field -
knowing (or thinking) that i had failed him was excruiatingly painful for me

Hello princess4u and thank you for starting the good little fem subs off with your reply!

I think that your emotions around the cold eyes shows the authentic pain that you felt. There is a real agony to endure when you feel the displeasure that cannot be ignored. Well written!

 

[shy slave]

you didn't really think it was all about the boys did you?

Lets begin this conversation talking about cold eyes.

If you are an owned sub or slave how do you feel and react to the coldness in your Dominants eyes when you suspect that coldness has something to do with you or your behaviour?

If you are a submissive that hopes to be under the thumb of a Dominant at some time...how do you "imagine" these cold eyes would affect you. ( or is that effect language nazi's?)

Anyone care to join this inquisitive Mistress?

I hate to see that coldness in anyones eyes.

I have yet to see it in his.

I dread it, knowing I may have caused it brings back lots of insecurities from years ago. I over compensate by talking far to much about rubbish trying to distract them onto other subjects or trains of thoughts.

It makes me anxious and I can feel the fight/flight response kick in.

It happened by 'phone recently, he had read an old post of mine and asked about it. I thought he was being critical or trying to say I had lied to him.

I immediately over reacted and went into a mix of emotions none of which were pleasant. It manifested in being a bitch to him. Not submissive at all.

If, and I am sure it will, it happens face-to-face i have no idea what or how I will feel. The aftermath is a very lonely and 'being alone' feeling, full of sadness and a sense of failure beyond redemption.

That may sound like an over reaction but it is how it affects me if I think I have caused displeasure to a person I have respect.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Cold eyes or shortness in a dominants tone make me crumble. Imagine shakey, breaking out in a sweat, sick to her stomach, mind going a mile a min to figure out what she did wrong, wided eyes filling with tears. That would be my reaction.

I was waiting for you! ~~smile~~

I am not surprised that you would be so shaken by the coldness but am pleased that you have been so candid with your reply. Thank you for adding the power of challenged emotions to the conversation. Physical manifestations of fear?

 

[Ms_Toy]

you didn't really think it was all about the boys did you?

Lets begin this conversation talking about cold eyes.

If you are an owned sub or slave how do you feel and react to the coldness in your Dominants eyes when you suspect that coldness has something to do with you or your behaviour?

If you are a submissive that hopes to be under the thumb of a Dominant at some time...how do you "imagine" these cold eyes would affect you. ( or is that effect language nazi's?)

Anyone care to join this inquisitive Mistress?

It's absolutely crushing. It sends me into such despair that my worlds seems to implode. I will do anything to change that look and make Masters eyes smile again.

 

[Shadowsdream]

I hate to see that coldness in anyones eyes.

I have yet to see it in his.

I dread it, knowing I may have caused it brings back lots of insecurities from years ago. I over compensate by talking far to much about rubbish trying to distract them onto other subjects or trains of thoughts.

It makes me anxious and I can feel the fight/flight response kick in.

It happened by 'phone recently, he had read an old post of mine and asked about it. I thought he was being critical or trying to say I had lied to him.

I immediately over reacted and went into a mix of emotions none of which were pleasant. It manifested in being a bitch to him. Not submissive at all.

If, and I am sure it will, it happens face-to-face i have no idea what or how I will feel. The aftermath is a very lonely and 'being alone' feeling, full of sadness and a sense of failure beyond redemption.

That may sound like an over reaction but it is how it affects me if I think I have caused displeasure to a person I have respect.

hello shy slave

Thank you for the post..so very perceptive and will certainly have many nodding their heads in agreement. Personally I do not think it is an over reation at all.

Coldness is difficult to gauge and hard to over come. Definately something a submissive should prefer not to be subjected too!

 

[Shadowsdream]

It's absolutely crushing. It sends me into such despair that my worlds seems to implode. I will do anything to change that look and make Masters eyes smile again.

Welcome Ms_Toy it is wonderful to see you in this thread?

"Implode" a very powerful and descriptive word that says as much about the fragility of submission and cold eyes as any other word I have seen used to explain the emotions! Thank you for adding your voice.

 

[Kajira Callista]

I was waiting for you! ~~smile~~

I am not surprised that you would be so shaken by the coldness but am pleased that you have been so candid with your reply. Thank you for adding the power of challenged emotions to the conversation. Physical manifestations of fear?

Yes, fear of failure in some way. Knowing i must not have done my best at something my Dominant wanted. This will probably sound dumb to a lot of people, but i really always want to be a good girl... if i do something to deserve the cold eyes, to me it means i made a big mistake....a really big mistake.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Yes, fear of failure in some way. Knowing i must not have done my best at something my Dominant wanted. This will probably sound dumb to a lot of people, but i really always want to be a good girl... if i do something to deserve the cold eyes, to me it means i made a big mistake....a really big mistake.

Not dumb at all...from what I know of you you take your submission very seriously and I would expect no less from you than the desire to be a good girl! Cold eyes can often be the beginning of boredom as well do you agree KC?

 

[Kajira Callista]

Not dumb at all...from what I know of you you take your submission very seriously and I would expect no less from you than the desire to be a good girl! Cold eyes can often be the beginning of boredom as well do you agree KC?

Wow thats a scary one, i would hate to look at eyes that were bored because of me or with me. That would be heartbreaking...pretty much unbearable. I would hope that before i ever had to see that type of look i would have done all i could to prevent ever having to see it.

 

[His_pita]

Yes, fear of failure in some way. Knowing i must not have done my best at something my Dominant wanted. This will probably sound dumb to a lot of people, but i really always want to be a good girl... if i do something to deserve the cold eyes, to me it means i made a big mistake....a really big mistake.

This is not dumb at all to me. I only want to be a good girl in my Dom's eyes too. I haven't expierenced a cold stare from him yet. He is immensly kind to me, but I know he expects a lot from me and failing Him fills me with fear. I imagine I will be devasted and do all I can to make it better if I can.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Wow thats a scary one, i would hate to look at eyes that were bored because of me or with me. That would be heartbreaking...pretty much unbearable. I would hope that before i ever had to see that type of look i would have done all i could to prevent ever having to see it.

Understanding the eyes and when coldness means anger...or disappointment or boredom can be very edgy. But the reality is not to be missed.
It is very nice to know that you would do your best to to prevent rather than fix such a moment.

 

[Shadowsdream]

This is not dumb at all to me. I only want to be a good girl in my Dom's eyes too. I haven't expierenced a cold stare from him yet. He is immensly kind to me, but I know he expects a lot from me and failing Him fills me with fear. I imagine I will be devasted and do all I can to make it better if I can.

Hello His_pita
I suspect your Dom knows how hard you try to keep Him proud of you!

 

[Kajira Callista]

Understanding the eyes and when coldness means anger...or disappointment or boredom can be very edgy. But the reality is not to be missed.
It is very nice to know that you would do your best to to prevent rather than fix such a moment.

 

[moonieblue]

My boyfriend has only recently started to explore his Dominant side. However I have been a sub for as long as I can remember. I got the cold eyes from him last week for the very first time (we have been dating for over a year). The look he gave me caused my heart to race. He was extremely disappointed in me and it hurt me to know that I had caused this emotion. Just like that, nothing else in the world mattered (work, world events, ect) except to make him happy. All I wanted to do was beg for his forgiveness and make things right, and promise to never do it again. The silence was more painful than any whipping I have ever recieved.

 

[shy slave]

Yes, fear of failure in some way. Knowing i must not have done my best at something my Dominant wanted. This will probably sound dumb to a lot of people, but i really always want to be a good girl... if i do something to deserve the cold eyes, to me it means i made a big mistake....a really big mistake.

You really say it well KC

I can relate to the need to want to be a good girl

 

[shy slave]

Understanding the eyes and when coldness means anger...or disappointment or boredom can be very edgy. But the reality is not to be missed.
It is very nice to know that you would do your best to to prevent rather than fix such a moment.

These are scary thoughts Shadowsdream.

The idea that the coldness could be boredom.

The thought that my submission would bore him or make him disappointed in some way would really mess with my mind.

I would spend a long time analysing what happened, when it happened and why. Even more time would be spent wondering why, if is/was bored did he continue with the relationship.

Working out the reality of what the coldness of his eyes meant would undoubtedly have me craving to make it better in some way; even if that meant cutting myself off from him in order for him to move on.

 

[madetobeme]

If you are an owned sub or slave how do you feel and react to the coldness in your Dominants eyes when you suspect that coldness has something to do with you or your behaviour?

Ma'am, seeing coldness in my Master's eyes or to feel them in His words is akin to the worst punishment. I yearn to please Him with every single fiber of my being and knowing that something I have done or haven't done has caused Him displeasure in any form is a crushing realization.

The coldness is comparable to the severing of His Dominance, and without this sustenance I cease to exist.

 

[pandoravampire]

Cold eyes, or 'that look' when ive cocked up, thats not a good feeling at all. If i thought he were bored by me though? that would be far worse!

Living day in day out with a D and me, well im afraid i get cold eyes often. as switching between manager, mother and sub is occasionally not as fluid as he requires.

And in my happy little twisted world, sometimes this works wonders.
When he is at his most dominant, and certain looks look very dominant , well that encourages my submission. That look drops me very quickly. Its almost his warning sign that im off track. So if i get assertive, and he drops me, it works out fine for us, we are both happy.

Other days, when im really not submissive, or im crabby, then that look is met with a mirrored expression from me. A 'fuck you!' look. This will go either one way or another, either he will come at me like a speeding train, the orders barked in quick succession, constantly reinforcing who we both are in this, or i get the silent treatment, whilst he cools down and i, then i will be told what why and when i did wrong down to the last ifinately small detail. And whilst he's telling me, im contrite, submissive and falling in love all over again.

D/s seems to me, to be a self fullfilling prophecy at times. great!.

 

[Shadowsdream]

My boyfriend has only recently started to explore his Dominant side. However I have been a sub for as long as I can remember. I got the cold eyes from him last week for the very first time (we have been dating for over a year). The look he gave me caused my heart to race. He was extremely disappointed in me and it hurt me to know that I had caused this emotion. Just like that, nothing else in the world mattered (work, world events, ect) except to make him happy. All I wanted to do was beg for his forgiveness and make things right, and promise to never do it again. The silence was more painful than any whipping I have ever recieved.

Hello moonieblue and welcome to the conversation.

The very first time you experience the cold eyes it can almost be shocking...mind blowing and deflating but the lessons learned if one is so inclined to avoid the "look" can fill you with the warmth of progress!

 

[Shadowsdream]

These are scary thoughts Shadowsdream.

The idea that the coldness could be boredom.

The thought that my submission would bore him or make him disappointed in some way would really mess with my mind.

I would spend a long time analysing what happened, when it happened and why. Even more time would be spent wondering why, if is/was bored did he continue with the relationship.

Working out the reality of what the coldness of his eyes meant would undoubtedly have me craving to make it better in some way; even if that meant cutting myself off from him in order for him to move on.

~~smile~~ I am pleased that you think so deeply through this conversation shy slave but would hope you would be brave enough to ask Him when the ice began to thaw if He still saw your value and could He help you understand how to find His smile again so that Y/you both might once again feel the magic of the BDSM relationship Y/you desired with each other.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Ma'am, seeing coldness in my Master's eyes or to feel them in His words is akin to the worst punishment. I yearn to please Him with every single fiber of my being and knowing that something I have done or haven't done has caused Him displeasure in any form is a crushing realization.

The coldness is comparable to the severing of His Dominance, and without this sustenance I cease to exist.

Cold eyes is a subtle Domination with crushing implications. Not a word need be spoken yet the message can hold you in the chill of agony.

Hello madetobeme....I love your nickname...welcome to the conversation.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Cold eyes, or 'that look' when ive cocked up, thats not a good feeling at all. If i thought he were bored by me though? that would be far worse!

Living day in day out with a D and me, well im afraid i get cold eyes often. as switching between manager, mother and sub is occasionally not as fluid as he requires.

And in my happy little twisted world, sometimes this works wonders.
When he is at his most dominant, and certain looks look very dominant , well that encourages my submission. That look drops me very quickly. Its almost his warning sign that im off track. So if i get assertive, and he drops me, it works out fine for us, we are both happy.

Other days, when im really not submissive, or im crabby, then that look is met with a mirrored expression from me. A 'fuck you!' look. This will go either one way or another, either he will come at me like a speeding train, the orders barked in quick succession, constantly reinforcing who we both are in this, or i get the silent treatment, whilst he cools down and i, then i will be told what why and when i did wrong down to the last ifinately small detail. And whilst he's telling me, im contrite, submissive and falling in love all over again.

D/s seems to me, to be a self fullfilling prophecy at times. great!.

~~smile~~ hello pandoravampire

Are you telling Me that you give the "fuck you look?" OO!

I love that you have given an entire picture of earning the look...fighting the look...and how both you and your Dom handle it from start to finish...COMMUNICATION! True communication is the real healer and will generally melt the cold eyes!

Thank you for for being so honest and bringing a smile to this serious Domme face.