gypsyTX
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2015
- Posts
- 4,136
Oh Que!
- Thread starter jezzilee
- Start date
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
The poor friend. He must have been in some pain. I am glad for him its over, I'm sorry its starting, or not ending, for those around him.
Sometimes human contact is a wish people deal with such tragedy or reminder of mortality. It certainly feels creepy I think if its not someone's one instinct. I know however sensual contact is important to me in grief.It might be the same for your friend/ acquaintance. That you share this contact might have made the approach that is inappropriate to you might come from a not ill meaning place of sadness and care for the friend and you.
Elle here is where the sadness is coming from. He and I were always close, yes that was years ago, but ever since I got his facebook friend request and the, "Hey would you like to get together sometime" request that came with it, I have been meaning to make time to do it. He was a great guy, truly wonderful and we had some amazing times. He was my friend, my lover and once in a while my enemy. I am glad we were on the friendship side of things when this happened. I never made time to see him always thinking we could some day...now some day on this planet will be never. I was surprised by the comments of his family, and his 14 year old daughter. No one was even a little bit shocked. He must have been in horrible pain. I am glad he is no longer suffering, and ashamed I did not make time for him.
Aww, I'm sorry, hun. That is terrible.
Hugs.
Jezzi, I'm so sorry you're going through such a shocking sadness right now. There's just no way to prepare for getting that kind of news.
Thank you gypsy, calli. Wish I could get real hugs from my you all right now... virtual ones are wonderful though.
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
I wrote a poem when I was 17 about suicide. I lost my sister when she was 39. She was addicted to alcohol, narcotics and heroin and wound up with liver problems and some other issues that she chose not to fight. To me, she gave up and that is the same as killing yourself. There were so many options but when a person has no hopes, goals or dreams, I guess they also forget that there are reasons to live.
At 17 I thought I was going to lose her for other reasons. I wrote this about her, I am glad that I had her for as long as I did and I miss her greatly. She read this a couple years after I wrote it. She knew it was based on her life at that time.
Too Young To Die
She partied and played
and led a fast life.
Then one day,
while holding a knife,
She said, "My life is a mess
I'm worth nothing at all,
though I must admit,
it's been quite a ball.
I'm bruised and I'm battered,
I'm strung out on coke
I do anything to get
the pot that I smoke
My house is a mess
It's covered with grime
I know for a fact
That now is the time."
She slit both her wrists
And she fell to the floor
She cried and she cried
Til the tears came no more
Her blood formed a pool
Glistening, deep red
Thoughts of her life
Played on in her head
But it mattered no more,
Her blood had run dry.
Her very last thought was
I'm too young to die.
~t
At 17 I thought I was going to lose her for other reasons. I wrote this about her, I am glad that I had her for as long as I did and I miss her greatly. She read this a couple years after I wrote it. She knew it was based on her life at that time.
Too Young To Die
She partied and played
and led a fast life.
Then one day,
while holding a knife,
She said, "My life is a mess
I'm worth nothing at all,
though I must admit,
it's been quite a ball.
I'm bruised and I'm battered,
I'm strung out on coke
I do anything to get
the pot that I smoke
My house is a mess
It's covered with grime
I know for a fact
That now is the time."
She slit both her wrists
And she fell to the floor
She cried and she cried
Til the tears came no more
Her blood formed a pool
Glistening, deep red
Thoughts of her life
Played on in her head
But it mattered no more,
Her blood had run dry.
Her very last thought was
I'm too young to die.
~t
L
La damnee elle la licorne
Guest
Last edited by a moderator:
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
Let's start the smiles with Dogs.
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/bw.jpg
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/000_0093.jpg
This was my dog named Buddie. He was a best of show grand champion...Best beagle ever!
And this was a dog that came to my office to visit me almost every day! I had to keep treats there, because doesn't he look neglected and malnourished (giggles) I had all I could do to not take this sweet boy home with me every day...
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/000_0763.jpg
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/000_0762.jpg
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/bw.jpg
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/000_0093.jpg
This was my dog named Buddie. He was a best of show grand champion...Best beagle ever!
And this was a dog that came to my office to visit me almost every day! I had to keep treats there, because doesn't he look neglected and malnourished (giggles) I had all I could do to not take this sweet boy home with me every day...
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/000_0763.jpg
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/family/000_0762.jpg
Woof!!
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
HEY, jezzilee, it is NOT your responsibility... We all carry our own responsibilities. Its good to be caring and want to help. But we also have to accept that people do what they do for themselves.
I'm going to PM you something, ok?
I don't feel responsible for what happened to him, I feel ashamed that I did not make time for someone who was so special to me for so long. You don't have to ask hon... my box is open to you any time.
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
Lyricalli
Strange Little Bug
- Joined
- Jul 1, 2014
- Posts
- 4,406
It is, I think, human nature to forget about time that way. Unless there is a reason for us to be specifically conscious that time with a loved one is limited, most of us are comfortable with the idea of "someday". I don't think you'll find many people who can say they've lost someone that they felt they didn't make enough time for. Forgive yourself, because I'm sure your friend wants that peace for you. We wish we could give you real hugs, too.
L
La damnee elle la licorne
Guest
Last edited by a moderator:
This
Even those of us who just take the time to know you briefly here Jezzilee, are richer souls for it. Your time is used well, actively, in a caring way, exploring. And enjoying dogs! In this you become a gift to your friends, a shard of delight joy bringer. I feel you are some one who gives more than takes. Look how willing your were to do something for me.
This is a conversation of joy, for those who meet Jezzie benefit from it.
Really well said.
L
La damnee elle la licorne
Guest
Last edited by a moderator:
L
La damnee elle la licorne
Guest
Last edited by a moderator:
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
I (possibly we) am about to see how I would look blonde.
I am changing my hair color to this...
http://ll-us-i5.wal.co/dfw/dce07b8c-a438/k2-_c29427eb-557b-4e07-a8ce-179083882c5e.v1.jpg-a6c69eb016d1d91ac0d6de308a8fd735a602ce7b-optim-450x450.jpg
to do so, I first must strip it of it's natural color.... pix to follow.
I am changing my hair color to this...
http://ll-us-i5.wal.co/dfw/dce07b8c-a438/k2-_c29427eb-557b-4e07-a8ce-179083882c5e.v1.jpg-a6c69eb016d1d91ac0d6de308a8fd735a602ce7b-optim-450x450.jpg
to do so, I first must strip it of it's natural color.... pix to follow.
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
Haha, that doesn't help
frisky kitty!
L
La damnee elle la licorne
Guest
Last edited by a moderator:
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
I change my highlight and lowlights to red tones last time and this time. Not as bright as that. Its fun, but it faded badly for me. We'll see this time. It keeps surprising me to be so dark, and as my eyebrows are quite fair i have to really get them right. The hair dresser said I should go darker with them, but I feel uncomfortable going even darker with my painted on brows
Hair is fun.. I have not done anything like this in a long time sooo here is me normally
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/055.jpg
The scary bleaching process:
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/021_2.jpg
And the in between the old and new do...the bleached...
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/022_1.jpg
http://i76.photobucket.com/albums/j8/jezzi_lee/047.jpg
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
"Luscious Raspberries"??! I can't wait! (I sort of liked the 'blonde' photos, too.)
jezzilee
*cun~tastro~phe*
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2015
- Posts
- 13,641
Thanks Dave... I just found out... that I am not afan of luscious Raspberry. I am going to change it in a few days...
will post a pic of the final color later tonight after I do something with it
HellBenttoo
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2013
- Posts
- 9,002
we want to see it now!*L*
