Offensive Jokes

[psiberzerker]

I hate to offend people, but I love offensive humor. So, let's lighten up a little, and laugh a lot.

So, Bill Clinton was sitting in the Oval Office, when Hillary came in, and demanded to borrow AF1. Bill said "Sure, for a BJ."

She protested, that it was humiliating, demeaning, and she needed it for a State Function, but he insisted.

"You want to ride my plane, you got to suck little Bill."

She didn't have much choice, so she sighed, rolled her eyes, unzipped his pants, and popped it in her mouth. She immediately spit it out. "Ptooh! This tastes like shit!"

"Yeah," he laughed, "Chelsea wanted her allowance."

 

[Taint_mAnn]

Offensive? You telling jokes about the President fucking his underage child in the ass isn't offensive.

 

[Libsam]

I waited tables at a very nice, high end restaurant. We had 3 party rooms besides the main floor, our largest room was fire code approved for a little over 500 people. The kitchen was 4,000 sq ft and there were two kitchens in it.

When the shit hit the fan in this place, it fucking hit the fan. I once saw a co-worker lose their shit and crawl up in a fetal position under the computer station. It was the peak of a weekend night on some minor holiday, it was surreal.

I learned how to ride the wave of chaos there and how to harness it. If you can do that, you just float on top of all the shit.


(I know it offends psiber to derail threads. ba-dum-tsss)

 

[psiberzerker]

Offensive? You telling jokes about the President fucking his underage child in the ass isn't offensive.

Okay, I'll change the names...

But isn't it funny?

 

[Taint_mAnn]

Okay, I'll change the names...

But isn't it funny?

Not really.

 

[Taint_mAnn]

What I found funny was that "Fuck her right in the pussy guy". That was one of the best offensive trolls in the history of offensive trolling. It was so funny because it did exactly what he wanted it to do, offend people. When it caught on and everyone started doing it on live broadcasts and people were crying and losing their shit over it. Classic.

This is the first fake news report... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJGDtonkqPs

 

[Hypoxia]

SANDPAPER SAL featuring Melanoma.

 

[BotanyBoy]

Fuckin' pepe....

http://static.cnews.fr/sites/default/files/pepe_the_frog_sad.jpg


Because nothing sends the SJW/"progressive" crowd into a foaming at the mouth rage like responding to some of their idiotic shit with a smug ass frog.

 

[nowisthetime]

Fuckin' pepe....

http://static.cnews.fr/sites/default/files/pepe_the_frog_sad.jpg


Because nothing sends the SJW/"progressive" crowd into a foaming at the mouth rage like responding to some of their idiotic shit with a smug ass frog.

All that ranting about progressives.


You oughta thank progressives for allowing your Asian mama into this country. Because remember, at one point in time, Asians were banned from emigrating to the United States for being non-white.

People like to harp on progressives, but civilization wouldn't be advanced without those SJWs you bitch about.

I expect that kind of talk from backwoods swamptoads like the decrepit RW crew in here, but not a person who has a mixed bloodline.

 

[Hypoxia]

You oughta thank progressives for allowing your Asian mama into this country. Because remember, at one point in time, Asians were banned from emigrating to the United States for being non-white.

<snip>
I expect that kind of talk from backwoods swamptoads like the decrepit RW crew in here, but not a person who has a mixed bloodline.

We had an old rural Sonoma County home with now-voided covenants against people of Negroid or Mongoloid race remaining overnight. The neighbors were still pretty pale when we left, but going gay. Yes, we encountered interracial racists. Haters gonna hate.

 

[BotanyBoy]

All that ranting about progressives.

You oughta thank progressives for allowing your Asian mama into this country.

My mom is from Sweden.....

Because remember, at one point in time, Asians were banned from emigrating to the United States for being non-white.

Emigrating? I think you mean immigrating.

And not when my father, a refugee from leftist oppression and violence, came here and not at any point in my life.

People like to harp on progressives, but civilization wouldn't be advanced without those SJWs you bitch about.

Social justice as it's currently understood is regressive basic racism....not progress nor any sort of advancement.

I expect that kind of talk from backwoods swamptoads like the decrepit RW crew in here, but not a person who has a mixed bloodline.

That's because you're racist enough to think anyone not white wants your desired flavor of social and economic oppression holding them back.

 

[Libsam]

People like to harp on progressives, but civilization wouldn't be advanced without those SJWs you bitch about.

But what you are failing to realize is that progism is a tool, it's not a sound or valid philosophy on which to build a society. Yes, it helps evolve the foundational beliefs, but the core is still the same damned principles some old Greek dude wrote down on paper, and they probably weren't original to him, he was just the first one who managed to pass on the knowledge.

For thousands of years these foundational beliefs have been tested, and have been proven over and over and over and over again.

All legal citizens in The USA are so freaking lucky to be here. Lets keep it that way.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Offensive? You telling jokes about the President fucking his underage child in the ass isn't offensive.

She was underage (in DC) for Clinton's first term. After that, she was not.

 

[psiberzerker]

For thousands of years these foundational beliefs have been tested, and have been proven over and over and over and over again.

That's why we have Nazis marching openly in the streets.

Or maybe, it's because Conservatives see what they want to see, and can't even tell 1 fucking joke.

Is this what happened to GB? Is this why we can't just have fun?

This was supposed to be fun, a joke, and once again the Social Justice Fun Police stepped in to make it a social protest.

Lighten up.

 

[ThatsTheGuy]

https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fs-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com%2Foriginals%2F0e%2F86%2F89%2F0e8689014da809403aafd688af47ab44.jpg&f=1

 

[RobDownSouth]

All that ranting about progressives.


You oughta thank progressives for allowing your Asian mama into this country. Because remember, at one point in time, Asians were banned from emigrating to the United States for being non-white.

People like to harp on progressives, but civilization wouldn't be advanced without those SJWs you bitch about.

I expect that kind of talk from backwoods swamptoads like the decrepit RW crew in here, but not a person who has a mixed bloodline.

Moochie's dad was the one from Korea (unsure of his citizenship when he arrived here, probably illegal). Moochie's mom was Texas trailer trash who gifted him with an anchor babby due to her ignorance of birth control, which was quite common at the time.

 

[WoundedKnee]

Yeah, you should have made that about the Trumps and then you would have been the darling of the board and much mirth and merriment to follow and as an additional bonus, another thread in which to LWCJ about the rwcj.

 

[Chancellor_Palpatine]

Yeah, you should have made that about the Trumps and then you would have been the darling of the board and much mirth and merriment to follow and as an additional bonus, another thread in which to LWCJ about the rwcj.

^ Is an offensive joke.

 

[ThatsTheGuy]

Yeah, you should have made that about the Trumps and then you would have been the darling of the board and much mirth and merriment to follow and as an additional bonus, another thread in which to LWCJ about the rwcj.

https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2Fs7.favim.com%2Forig%2F151022%2Fcat-funny-loading-cat-meme-Favim.com-3463857.jpg&f=1

 

[RocketLauncher]

^ Is an offensive joke.

Well, speaking of offensive, look what the cat dragged in!
Long time no see, Chancey. Missed your surly repartee, it's the highlight of my day.

 

[ThatsTheGuy]

https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fs-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com%2Foriginals%2Fa6%2F30%2Fa9%2Fa630a99b0c5dd31145e1d03df1fbe550.jpg&f=1

 

[BotanyBoy]

Moochie's dad was the one from Korea (unsure of his citizenship when he arrived here, probably illegal). Moochie's mom was Texas trailer trash who gifted him with an anchor babby due to her ignorance of birth control, which was quite common at the time.

LOL my mom isn't from Texas like your sorry ass.....

Nice try at the lies again Rob, too bad about eh projection fail though.

 

[psiberzerker]

Yeah, you should have made that about the Trumps and then you would have been the darling of the board and much mirth and merriment to follow and as an additional bonus, another thread in which to LWCJ about the rwcj.

Or just tell a joke? Grow a sense of humor, it's no fun not having fun if someone else is having fun?

I don't want to be the darling of the board, and I heard that joke in the 90s. When the Clintons were in the white house, and I didn't want to spell Melania.

Nobody on this board knows a single offensive, or dirty joke? When it was a thread about hypocracy, they popped like jiffy pop, but now, oh no. Not as long as there's a Social Justice Warrior to put a stop to it.

No fun. That's not allowed on the General Board.

"Mertyl, guit the hose, the dadblamed liberals is at it agin!"

 

[rae121452]

i'll go. when i was in gradeschool, we told "roman soldier" jokes.....

did you hear aboutthe roman soldier who said, "Would you mind crossing your legs, i've only got one more nail."

did you hear aboutthe roman soldier who said, "I don't care what your name is, stop dragging that cross through my garden."



there were also the "little billy" jokes, of which i only remember one.

tommy: mrs. wilson, can little billy come out to play?
Mrs wilson: but you know little billy has cerebral palsy.
tommy: yeah, but he makes a great second base.

 

[ThatsTheGuy]

A politician walks into the GB lounge.........