NYC and My own tears..

[CelticsHeart]

Last night I lay in bed with my husband, alone in our house for the first time in weeks (we`ve had a horrendous screed of visitors from the UK!), and for the first time since the terrible tragedy reekd on NYC I cried whilst he held me.

This might seem terrible to admit but I was not crying for the dead or the lost or the missing....I cried for my 10 year old son, and for the child we will soon bring to this world (God willing).

I watched in horror as the Towers collapsed and was physically sick at the thought, my heart had bled for all of those affected, but you know what really got to me?

Fear.

Fear for the future my son will see unfold, fear of the uncertainty of events to come. As I have grown up I watched conflicts happen in so many areas, as did we all. Rwanda seemd a million miles away, Kosovo a place I`d only heard of, the struggles of the former Soviet Union and other places were terrible, but I knew me and mine would go unharmed. But this thing has such far reaching fingers, which will pass over more of us than is imaginable, and I am frightened by it.

I watched the BBC`s world news last night before the Tribute and I did this because a part of me wanted the news to give me just the bare facts, no emotion, just facts. ( try it...I learned lots) there were "emminent leaders from the Islamic world" speaking about how the Jihad announced by the Taliban and OBL is so wrong....a Jihad should be brought down on the oppressor in a conflict - they felt that was what the Taliban and OBL were to the Afghani people. I realised more about the Islamic religion in a short hour than I`ve accumulated in 35 years.

Then a long report on the days events in Pakistan - people being shot to death for protesting in support of the Taliban, massive crowds cheering and burning effigies of Bush.

I wouldn`t be a leader in Pakistan for anything right now! Their situation is undefinable - they sit right on the border and right in the firing line ( the Taliban had moved troops to it!) These are the very people who the world must lean on for support by use of the land and airspace if the day comes ( I do not doubt it will) I personally pray for them to be strong in their resolve to side against terrorism.

I don`t know why I`m writing this, or even if I am clear in my thinking on this, so forgive my ramblings....I just needed to vent and ask everyone to pray to your own God for help in what is about to come.

Respectfully,

Heart xx

 

[OUTSIDER]

I've lived my whole life in London and we've been bombed more time than I can count and I'll tell you this for free, the fear will subside but you will notice your eyes will be more open now to danger from terror attacks than they were before.

I live in a city where the car parked on the street could be an IRA bomb and that guy with the Irish accent you sold your car to could be a bomber, you'll notice many more things thanyou did before but in many ways you'll be better off.

DCL asked in a recent thread "is ignorance bliss ?", well yes it is in a way, well the USA was largely ignorant to terrorists but now you've been woken up, you may not be as happy as you were before but you'll be a whole lot safer now your eye's are open.

This may all sound a little callous but it isn't meant to be I'm just trying to tell you the truth, it's a sad an terrible thing that has happened but it was an eye opener.

BTW, BBC News 24 rules

 

[CelticsHeart]

I know...

I lived the first 34 years of my life in the UK before moving to Canada.

I lost a dear friend to the terrorism in Ireland, when she was only 23 years old...but still all that knowledge does little to stem the fear in me.

It is not only a fear of violence I guess, but of the devastation, ecconomic collapse and poverty that some places in this world will no doubt suffer, it`s a fear that my son will witness more of the horror that we have seen this past week.

I`m a dreamer I guess, I always hope one day the world will be different...you know - John Lennon style.

I know what you are saying Outsider, better to walk with open eyes than sit with them closed, but hey, it doesn`t mean you don`t dread what you will see.

Yeah the BBC rocks - it`s one of the few things I still miss.

Heart xx

PS : your "saggy old, baggy old cat" is cool too! Does Emily still love him?

 

[OUTSIDER]

Yes "even though he's saggy and a bit loose at the seam's"

 

[CelticsHeart]

Good to hear

I`m very glad to hear it....

 

[Demian]

I wuz in London in '79

Saw my first REAL punk rockerz...My first thought wuz, "Iz that a Stand for gay rights?"...One of them asked us for the time...The first time I didn't hear a Black person speak Ebonic...The first time I saw a placard saying report any unleft packages...I want to move to the Alps more and more...I want to learn how to Yodel