Justadesperatewifeandmom
digital demi-god
- Joined
- Aug 6, 2017
- Posts
- 27,597
oh and a face shot.
http://i.imgur.com/CZ3q9VGm.jpg
I both like and don't like this shot.
It looks pretty, but my age is showing through. I will be honest and say I am not aging gracefully. I had always planned to try and fight it. People make comments about no tan lines, and that is because I don't tan. 90% of aging is the sun, so since I appreciated that in my young teens, my makeup has always included sunscreen. I wear it outdoors.
there are several reasons on the aging. the obvious is of course, metabolism slows, looks fade yada yada. there is also the loss of perks. the perks have some to do with looks, but also to do with the target age group in general. now it does suck in a lot of ways to be a young female, but the positives are not waiting in lines, not paying for drinks, doors magically open etc etc. This is because a young female attracts men in their 20s primarily, who are walking hard ons with the primary focus of getting laid. As you inch near 30s, men shift into their 30s. Most are looking to settle down and not try for casual encounters, thus the whole climb fences, trudge through mud, beg, steal, lie, whatever to impress that stranger is gone. As they aren't looking at strangers. Then in your 30s, it is men in their 40s, which takes work to get them thinking about screwing you. What does that leave as I enter my 40s, and target type would be 50s lol.
but the biggest issue with 30 was I had always put so much pressure on 30. I could be fun and carefree and worry about nothing, live for the moment. Then when I was "old and decrepit" like 30, I could settle down, have kids, start being responsible. So yes, 30 was like the end of an era. And I try, and have mostly settled down. But I miss risk. I miss the rush. I miss living only for the now, because I am young and have my whole life ahead of me.
Now I turn 40 next month. 40. Yeah that one is rough. 40 is, statistically speaking, over the hill. You have officially lived longer than you likely will. I still like to believe I am invincible. But now comes mammograms, probably colonoscopies, or at least someone shoving their finger up my ass not in a good way. Cholesterol tests, joint issues, oh and bifocals. But also the really tough part about it is people in their 40s are preparing for retirement, their kids' college. They have all their shit together, are where they want to be, stable in their career, stable in life, classy, elegant yada yada. But not only do they not seem to have long not had that rush of crazy and impulsive for a long time, but they don't even seem to miss it.
I don't think I can be stable, together, classic, elegant. Just the responsibilities of 30s and lessening of living in the moment often feels stagnant. How do people in the 40s have it all together, and not miss the rush of not having it all together. I just don't think I adult correctly. there is always that something just beneath the surface, that longing for crazy and exciting.
Anyway, while this picture reminds me of the upcoming 40, I also think I do look like that together, classic, 40 year old. maybe I can be an adult lol
http://i.imgur.com/CZ3q9VGm.jpg
I both like and don't like this shot.
It looks pretty, but my age is showing through. I will be honest and say I am not aging gracefully. I had always planned to try and fight it. People make comments about no tan lines, and that is because I don't tan. 90% of aging is the sun, so since I appreciated that in my young teens, my makeup has always included sunscreen. I wear it outdoors.
there are several reasons on the aging. the obvious is of course, metabolism slows, looks fade yada yada. there is also the loss of perks. the perks have some to do with looks, but also to do with the target age group in general. now it does suck in a lot of ways to be a young female, but the positives are not waiting in lines, not paying for drinks, doors magically open etc etc. This is because a young female attracts men in their 20s primarily, who are walking hard ons with the primary focus of getting laid. As you inch near 30s, men shift into their 30s. Most are looking to settle down and not try for casual encounters, thus the whole climb fences, trudge through mud, beg, steal, lie, whatever to impress that stranger is gone. As they aren't looking at strangers. Then in your 30s, it is men in their 40s, which takes work to get them thinking about screwing you. What does that leave as I enter my 40s, and target type would be 50s lol.
but the biggest issue with 30 was I had always put so much pressure on 30. I could be fun and carefree and worry about nothing, live for the moment. Then when I was "old and decrepit" like 30, I could settle down, have kids, start being responsible. So yes, 30 was like the end of an era. And I try, and have mostly settled down. But I miss risk. I miss the rush. I miss living only for the now, because I am young and have my whole life ahead of me.
Now I turn 40 next month. 40. Yeah that one is rough. 40 is, statistically speaking, over the hill. You have officially lived longer than you likely will. I still like to believe I am invincible. But now comes mammograms, probably colonoscopies, or at least someone shoving their finger up my ass not in a good way. Cholesterol tests, joint issues, oh and bifocals. But also the really tough part about it is people in their 40s are preparing for retirement, their kids' college. They have all their shit together, are where they want to be, stable in their career, stable in life, classy, elegant yada yada. But not only do they not seem to have long not had that rush of crazy and impulsive for a long time, but they don't even seem to miss it.
I don't think I can be stable, together, classic, elegant. Just the responsibilities of 30s and lessening of living in the moment often feels stagnant. How do people in the 40s have it all together, and not miss the rush of not having it all together. I just don't think I adult correctly. there is always that something just beneath the surface, that longing for crazy and exciting.
Anyway, while this picture reminds me of the upcoming 40, I also think I do look like that together, classic, 40 year old. maybe I can be an adult lol
