Not quite Nilla...

[Guru]

 

[cymbidia]

No piercings, no beatings, no fire...

Geeze, man... take all the fun out of the play!



Okay, Guru my friend, have all these in readiness:
- handcuffs (not metal) already affixed to the bed. (If you *have* to use metal cuffs, for some unfathomable reason, be sure to provide some padding, like a washcloth wound round with tape, for each wrist.)

- blindfold

- handy-dandy, we-all-have-them-around-the-house-anyway sensation devices like a flyswatter (yes! a new and clean one! they only cost 49 cents!), ice, feathers, ruler, clothespins, a backscratcher, ear plugs (go to the grocery store and look in the first aid aisle), gloves for her hands (plastic dishwashing gloves will work fine). Dildos and vibrators and butt plugs and lubrication, of course. Maybe stuff for a hot bath, too, one you share or one you give her. Maybe stuff with which to shave her pubes, too! Oh yeh! I love that! Ahem. Sorry.

When she walks in the door, envelop her in a big hug and whisper that you want to play, that you'll be offering new sensations but you'll never really hurt her (Sensua isn't into pain, i know that - neither are you).

Do y'all have safe words already set up, Guru? If not, give her a word ("red" is a good one) with which she can stop -immediately- everything that's happening. another will slow things down so she can regain her equilibrium but it won't stop it ("yellow" is good for this). The third she can use to let you know she wants more of whatever you're doing, more harder deeper faster ("green").

Make sure both of you understand the use of these words and assent to playing in a way that she might need to use them.

Blindfold her.

Strip her or tell her to strip while you watch.

Lead her through the house, outside is fun if you can do it safely, naked and blindfolded, caressing her along the way. Use one of two toys as you walkm the feather or the backscratcher, maybe, to keep her a little offbalance. Tell her to hold her hands behind her body, clasped together behind her back, as you move - and *don't* let her bump hard into anything either!

Then to the place you've got prepared for play - and fasten her into the restraints.

Then begin to play - and be sure you watch her reactions and needs.

Have fun, Guru.
(Give Sensua a kiss for me, okay?)

b.

 

[Chicklet]

Hey there,

light spankings can be fun, a little bit of roleplay where on person ties their partners hands lightly behind their back and gives them a few swats. I think that sometimes when I'm not extra-interested in anything intense, that it can be a nice little bit of foreplay. you might experiment with some bondage, there are so many places to go with that! Even my boyfriend, who doesn't really like bdsm but will do it sometimes for me, can find things that he is interested in. bdsm isn't all about beatings, fire, and peircings, it is such a huge category full of interests and fetishes! I'm probably babbling now...I honestly don't have much experience myself, but hey, I'm only 20 and I figure i have at least 50 more years before I get bored with trying more/new/exciting things!

Best of luck,
Chicklet

 

[pierced_boy]

Half of what is suggested "Nilla" do anyway

.

 

[Guru]

 

[bluntforcemama]

Well, that definitely turned me on.

 

[cymbidia]

Hey Guru, you and i have been all over this whole "nilla" thing a few times in the past. Not being nilla is 'tude, my friend, a headspace, a way of looking at yourself and how you interact within the scope of your own private intimate relationships. It's got very little to do with whips and chains and piercing needles and everything to do with who you are in the middle of your primary emotiona/love relationship - and who that person is in relation to you.

"Course, you were WAY drunk the last time we discussed it, late late one night, so maybe you don't remember.


Myst, my darling?
I love you.


And finally, the whole lowered-eyes thing, fallon? Lots of Dominants ask for that, specifically, but lots don't. Some want it sometimes and some don't care when or if it's adhered to. Each Dominant is different with regard to that - and each situation within a single relationships can be different, too. There are no hard and fast rules for us all on this, i think.

Personally, some of the rawest and most totally open moments i've ever offered and felt in my whole life have been kneeling at my Dominant's feet, eyes fastened on theirs, and asking, requesting, begging for something that mattered to us both while my utter submission flowed nakedly from my eyes to theirs without any barriers at all. That kinda eye-to-eye contact can be shatteringly intense at any time between lovers, of course, but at times of deeply emotional and honest submission, it can add another level of intensity to the moment that's very different from what is found via other means.

Just my experience. Yours may be different!

 

[Guest]

Cym, in her infinite wisdom, has covered the subject well.

Here's a wonderful site that may supplement her information.

http://xenanuna.com/TECHNIQUES.html

 

[Ebonyfire]

Tied and tickled!

this works great if the subject is ticklish. You tie him/her to a bed or chair, blindfold, and put ear phones with suitable music playing. then you gather suitalbe tickling implements like feathers, paper, gloves, anything that can deliver a tickle.

Start at the least ticklish spot and progressively work to the most. Then alternate between random spots!

Works great! Enjoy!

Ebony

 

[Guru]