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NFL Headlines -- sort of.

Weird Harold

Weird Harold

Opinionated Old Fart
Joined
Mar 1, 2000
Posts
23,768
Thug dressed as Viking runs over hapless football team.
Grey haired old man seen inciting further mayhem.
-- Cleveland Morning News
 
My teams didn't play a geriatric viking thug, but they were hapless.
 
jomar said:
My teams didn't play a geriatric viking thug, but they were hapless.
Click to expand...

So give a headline about how hapless they were.

(Adrian Peterson powered the Vikings win. He's the viking thug. int he few minutes I watched the vikings/browns game, all Favre did ws hand the ball to Peterson and watch the Browns high-school auxiliary fall down and get stepped on.)
 
jomar said:
They sucked big time!

How's that?
Click to expand...
You'll never get a job writing headlines, I'm afraid. :p

It would help if you gave some kind of clue as to which team sucked -- there are so many to choose from.

Another headline from today:

Jerry Falwell takes credit for Bronco's victory!
Divine intervention request was a last minute afterthought during daily meeting with God, Falwell says.
 
It's nice for Favre's first game as a Viking to be against The Browns, not to mention getting to hand the ball to AP!
 
St. Louis Quarterback Makes Mistakes by Completing a Few Passes, Still Succeeds in Coercing Team to Lose

Alright, perhaps that's way too long of a headline, but I'm working on it.

A Dirty Sanchez Beats up the Brady Bunch 16-9

Quite racy, but hey. ;)
 
Falcons beat Panthers
Vikings beat Lions
Cardinals beat Jaguars
Redskins beat Rams
Bears Barely Escape Mauling by Steelers.

PETA accuses NFL of Animal Cruelty.
 
Last edited:
Giants win aided by Giant Jumbo-tron

(Every time they showed Romo on the sidelines, he was looking up at the controversial video screens in the new Cowboy Stadium -- as were most of the other cowboys. Only a few of the Giants were shown watching the replays.)
 
Eli Outdoes Brother Peyton: He Leads His Team on Game Winning Drive to Defeat Cowboys
 
TLS1923 said:
Eli Outdoes Brother Peyton: He Leads His Team on Game Winning Drive to Defeat Cowboys
Click to expand...

Yeah, because we all know Peyton has never led a game winning drive. Okay, well maybe a few.

I would LOVE to see a Manning Bowl.
 
Boota said:
Yeah, because we all know Peyton has never led a game winning drive. Okay, well maybe a few.

I would LOVE to see a Manning Bowl.
Click to expand...
Peyton Manning has the Dan Marino Disease. Y'know, throws a ball into triple coverage, gets pissy because the intended receiver doesn't catch it, and keeps his head down while on the sidelines.
 
Inept 49'ers negotiators look to find scapegoat.

Failure to sign our top draft pick couldn't possibly be our fault, says lead negotiator.
 
TLS1923 said:
Peyton Manning has the Dan Marino Disease. Y'know, throws a ball into triple coverage, gets pissy because the intended receiver doesn't catch it, and keeps his head down while on the sidelines.
Click to expand...

You forgot the part about where he wins. And the part where when he throws into triple coverage it is usually a completion. Best player in the NFL. Hands down.

Mean Horsies Steal Game From Ball Hogs!
 
Jets flew too high, were grounded by Saints

Tennessee Titanics
 
Finally revealed: T.O. is not Tarakin!

He was visible last week - for a moment.
 
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