Newbie
- Thread starter Laydia
- Start date
arjunindia
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2007
- Posts
- 155
ur at right spot, depends on ur relationship, time with him, what do u or will explore or does he know ur here first of all
Email me
RON
Email me
RON
Stella_Omega
No Gentleman
- Joined
- Jul 14, 2005
- Posts
- 39,700
Don't email RON. 
You will totally love this thread;
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=826295
and the updates are in this thread;
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=827635
You will totally love this thread;
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=826295
and the updates are in this thread;
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=827635
Sir_Winston54
Assume the position!
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2004
- Posts
- 14,027
RON: This is LITerotica. Besides that, this is the BDSM Talk forum of Literotica.
LIT means literate or literary - neither of which describes you.
BDSM means many of us have varied and multiple instruments of torture.
The BDSM Talk forum has a lot of people who don't like leetspeak, illiteracy, or asshattery, from all of which you suffer.
I suggest you run off and play in the Personals fora, or the Playground, or the General Board. If you ever grow up, wander in here and see what the adults do and say.
Sir_Winston54
Assume the position!
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2004
- Posts
- 14,027
Thanks, Dax. After 8+ years here, I sometimes get a little grumpy when I see a HNG try to swarm all over someone new who's trying to learn a little something about herself and this culture. (Or even himself and this culture.)....
- Also, Sir Winston, when you crush people like that it makes me happy in my pants!
Sir_Winston54
Assume the position!
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2004
- Posts
- 14,027
:: blush ::You are a valiant Sir!
We're in a committed relationship, we've been together for several years.. We've tried just about everything. I just need him to dominate me- and I don't know how to communicate this need without making him think I'm unsatisfied. And I don't want to make him feel inadequate...
midwestyankee
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2003
- Posts
- 32,060
I think you can reach your goal by doing just the opposite: by reinforcing what he does right. Next time you're up for some pairs aerobics, nudge him toward doing some things that would feel like he's dominating you. Perhaps you suggest, in that I'm-going-to-rock-your-world voice, that you'd like him to hold your hands above your head while he takes you. Assuming he gets the hint, you follow that up with something along the lines of "Damn, I loved it when you held my hands over my head and pounded me. That made me ..." I'm sure you get the idea. Instead of making him feel inadequate, this will do just the opposite.
That's good advice- The complication is that I like some pain with good sex... nails, teeth. I like to be restrained, light spanking.. all of that and more and he doesn't like pain of any kind with sex.. He tells me he would rather make love and be gentle.. But I need dominance sometimes.. I think it kind of dampens his desire to do those things to me.. How can I communicate this need to him.. I don't want to go outside of our relationship but I'm getting pretty restless and bored with only my imagination.
Primalex
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 14, 2007
- Posts
- 6,095
Seriously, which part of the advice didn't you get?
Stella_Omega
No Gentleman
- Joined
- Jul 14, 2005
- Posts
- 39,700
Take a look at this thread, and see if it makes any sense regarding your situation;
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=40603931#post40603931
MasterandSir
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2011
- Posts
- 159
When I've broached the topic of BDSM with vanilla people I've been involved with I just tell them about it, why I like it, what I think they'll like about it and why, and what I think is fun. I know it seems blunt to just tell someone but it has always worked well for me.
ecstaticsub
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- May 5, 2007
- Posts
- 3,389
You also have to be prepared for the possible reality that he may not get off on dominating you. The thought of dominating you may actually turn him off. He may be more turned on by you dominating him.
My husband has no interest in dominating me at all. We've been married over 20 years and he is the love of my life. We are both open minded and he was willing to give it a go, but it didn't do anything for him. A man dominating me, hurting me, using me resulting in him getting turned on gets me really hot. But if he doesn't get turned on by it then I won't get turned on by him faking it.
I love my husband and accept his kinks for what they are, he accepts mine. We have fun with the ones we share and open up our marriage for each other to indulge in our unshared kinks with others.
I see myself happily married for the rest of my life, partly due to both of us not trying to change the other.
My husband has no interest in dominating me at all. We've been married over 20 years and he is the love of my life. We are both open minded and he was willing to give it a go, but it didn't do anything for him. A man dominating me, hurting me, using me resulting in him getting turned on gets me really hot. But if he doesn't get turned on by it then I won't get turned on by him faking it.
I love my husband and accept his kinks for what they are, he accepts mine. We have fun with the ones we share and open up our marriage for each other to indulge in our unshared kinks with others.
I see myself happily married for the rest of my life, partly due to both of us not trying to change the other.
NikiCole
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2012
- Posts
- 425
I so understand... and sympathize. If you figure out how to, let me know.
In my one and only experience, be totally in love and willing to explore together on the same page, level and openness.
