New to bdsm

[Maggie4u]

One of my gf's (im bi) has been hinting at doing some bondage/bdsm stuff. We're both rather new to the idea. Any hints or suggestions on first encounters of getting started?

 

[dwmkcmo]

Well,

first of, you two need to discuss and decide what you want to do. Remember that communication is the key. There are all sorts of different kinds of bondage, from the physical to the mental. I suggest taking it easy the first time. Maybe try using some thread or some easily breakable string, in case it becomes to uncomfortable.

 

[Master Sensei]

I have a suggestion, post lots of pics of it.

 

[Chicklet]

One of my gf's (im bi) has been hinting at doing some bondage/bdsm stuff. We're both rather new to the idea. Any hints or suggestions on first encounters of getting started?

Well first off, I'd say you could find a lot of neat ideas and information just on this board. Check out the library for a categorized list of different things.

first of, you two need to discuss and decide what you want to do. Remember that communication is the key. There are all sorts of different kinds of bondage, from the physical to the mental. I suggest taking it easy the first time. Maybe try using some thread or some easily breakable string, in case it becomes to uncomfortable.

Communication really is important. When your girlfriend says she wants to experiment with bondage, she might have a totally different idea about what she wants to do than what pops into your head. Also, maybe she specifically wants her hands tied above her head to the headboard, or behind her back, and any other way isn't going to excite her as much. So find out, and procede from there.

I really don't recommend thread... anything too thin can cut into your wrists, and that's a painful annoyance. Which also makes me wonder if your girlfriend is fantasizing about a specific material to be bound with: rope, cuffs, handcuffs, scarves, etc. More questions for her from you = )

I saw some not-too-shabby wrist cuffs for sale yesterday in a toyshop near my house for $30. (too bad I don't have $30... i liked them) - I like cuffs because they keep the pressure around the wrist consistant. That's one of my personal preferences.

I have a suggestion, post lots of pics of it.

*rolls eyes at this post*

 

[Maggie4u]

Thanks all.

 

[graceanne]

*rolls eyes at this post*

*joins chicklet* pervs

Beyond that I wanna say

COMMUNICATE.

 

[Master Sensei]

*joins chicklet* pervs

Beyond that I wanna say

COMMUNICATE.

Umm... I'm a man.

 

[SwitchyBi]

Hi Maggie

Make sure you use that special stop word. Most of the true joy is in finding each others limits discovering one another. The only thing you can do wrong is hurt each other. As you explore and push the boundaries and talk, talk, talk about each others feelings. You will be pros in no time. More importantly you will be pros about each other and your needs. That's the goal, not conforming to some imaginary standard.

Switchy

 

[Fantazmaster]

Communication

I concur that communication is the key here before any such sessions.BTW have you asked your girlfriend what her ideas are for such a sessiion.I imagine she has a few!

One of my gf's (im bi) has been hinting at doing some bondage/bdsm stuff. We're both rather new to the idea. Any hints or suggestions on first encounters of getting started?

 

[misshum]

I agree.

If it is going to involve you both, there should be LOTS of communication. As someone said, "Nothing beats a clear understanding."

 

[SwitchyBi]

It seems everyone agrees. People into this scene always strike me as the most sensitive and caring. I guess they have releaved a lot of pent up emotion. Please remember, there is no test at the end. How savy are you? Did you do this right? No two people ever share the same experience. If you are playing with power exchanges. If you get off on it. You are perfect.

Switchy

 

[Gwenie]

I am new to this as well. Seems like communication, as in any relationship, is the key.

 

[little_dragon]

Sunday will actually be my first BDSM......we're (my Wolf and I (no 'master' for us, lol) discussing what to do and what not to do...but we've been friends for awhile and have shared our sexual fantasies on what we like, etc.

I have to agree with everyone else (cause it seems like the best info, lol)---communicate!!! Or you could be getting into something you don't want to be in, lol.

Little Dragon