New Story, your thoughts please.

[CraigBoi]

Well, this will be my 6th submission to literotica. I have to admit that I had the first 5 go up without being proof-read and recieved a few nasty emails from some very anal people about them. I want people who read my stories to enjoy them. So i was hoping you guys wouldnt mind giving this one a read and letting me know what i can do specifically to improve it.

All of my stories are accounts of real events, as I remember them. They usually contain alot of background info. Sometimes I think I may take too long to get to the good stuff. All of my characters so far, are people that I have been very emotionally involved with. My character in this particular story I am still togther with.

 

[CraigBoi]

My MILF ch.1: Sex Beach

Milf – n. Acronym for “mom I’d like to fuck.” Used to describe a woman old enough to be ones mother who is sexually attractive.

………………………………………………

A good friend of mine, Jose, had been dating Elise for almost 3 years. Elise introduced him to D/S, and tried to bring me into it as well. Well to her dismay, my enjoyment of D/S didn’t go beyond blindfolds and tie-downs. However, she did understand my sexuality without experiencing it first hand, and she loved hooking me up with her lonely friends whenever they needed a good fuck buddy. Now Jose and I are both in our early 20s. Elise, I’m guessing is in her early 40s, and as such, most of her friends were quite a bit older than me. So first there was Suzy, who was about 10 years older than me. Suzy wasn’t anything more than a fuck buddy. I wasn’t really attracted to her, but I didn’t really have any other girls at the time, and was happy with the sex we had. So on with the story…

Jose, Elise, Suzy and myself we up to our usual Thursday night antics, having a few drinks at the local watering hole. Suzy was very “clingy” and always had to be touching me, probably to let every other girl in the bar know she was with me. Obviously, this drove me nuts, because I was honestly embarrassed to be seen with her. She wasn’t that bad, but not up to my usual standards. After a few drinks, this gorgeous little blonde walks in and is saying her hellos around our circle. I am soon introduced and learn that her name is Amy, and she was one of Elise’s coworkers.

Now Amy looked like a munchkin next to me, standing only 5’ in contrast to my 6’3”. She wore he hair straight and short. Her face was beautiful with strong Italian features. She instantly reminded me of Carmella from the HBO show “The Sopranos.” Her breasts were at least a D cup and surprisingly perky for a woman, whom I guessed, was in her mid 30s. All of this tapered down to a flat stomach followed by round curvy hips and an ass that would give J-Lo a run for her money.

I leaned in and whispered to Elise, “I want one. Hook it up.”

She spun around with a look that was a little too excited and said, “Really? I’ll see what I can do.”

This was the stuff that Elise lived for. Elise always had a thing for me, and everyone knew it. So she thrived off hooking me up with her friends and hearing stories of my lovemaking abilities from them.

……………………………………………

Over the course of the next few weeks, I was becoming less and less interested in Suzy and more and more infatuated with Amy. I was learning a lot about Amy and her sexuality from Elise. She informed me that Amy was actually 40 and that the oldest of her 3 sons was only a few months younger than me. She told me about how she only dated younger guys. She told me about how boring of a sex life Amy had (most people’s sex lives are boring compared to Elise’s), and how all of the guys she dated were losers.

I was intrigued to say the least. I had never been with a woman old enough to be my mother. Hell, I had never even been with a woman that had kids (that I know of). I learned little nuances about her: Like how she has never had an orgasm from penetration, and how she can’t look her partner in the eyes when she is having sex. Amy had told Elise stories about how her and her ex-husband used to get in fights because she wouldn’t look at him when they were having sex. I also learned that Amy was very self-conscious and would never have sex during the day or with the lights on. And most shockingly of all, that Amy had never experienced multiple orgasms, due to the fact that she had never had a sexual session that lasted longer than 15 minutes.

Now my infatuation with Amy was turning into a conquest. Not only to have sex with a milf, but to bring a sexual awakening to a woman 18 years my elder. Most young men dream of learning sexual ways from an older woman, but not me. Rather, I would teach this woman what a real lover truly is. I would bring her pleasures that she had never dreamed of. I would take her to peaks of ecstasy that she never knew existed.

Turns out I didn’t know what I was getting myself into…

………………………………………………

I later found out from Elise, that the only thing keeping Amy from dating me, was that I was fucking Suzy. No later then that afternoon, I told Suzy that we done and I had made plans for a weekend get-away with Amy, Elise and Jose. Now I had to be very careful with my approach to Amy. I knew that I could have her pretty much whenever I wanted her. But I wanted more than just a one-nighter, or a fuck buddy for a couple of weeks. I wanted to broaden her horizons, and to do that I would first need to gain her trust.

Our first weekend together was sexually uneventful, but served a higher purpose. During the Sunday of that weekend, our social facades faded and we both dropped our guard to let the other person in. We let each other see who we truly were, and we found out that we liked each other. I wont bore you with the details, but I will say that it involved both of us in our bathing suits, getting caught in the rain, and the car door test (if you’ve ever seen the movie A Bronx Tale).

Over the next few weeks we hung out almost every night. We cuddled a lot and almost every night ended with a solid make-out session and usually some heavy petting. One night, we both had way too much to drink and ended up going down on each other. I wish I could elaborate, but I barely remember the experience. I can tell you that she came, and I didn’t. Otherwise, my plan was working. We were both falling for each other, hard.

The day after our oral experience, I made plans for another weekend getaway. This time it would be just the two of us. A weekend that we now simply refer to simply as “Sex Beach”

…………………………………………….

That Friday took forever to arrive. And when it did, both of us were running late. We had about a three-hour drive to the beach resort that I had booked for us. The car ride was amazing. We talked the whole way and for the first time we really opened up to each other. We each admitted to the other that we were falling for them. And by the time we arrived, we were officially a couple.

It was at least midnight when we finally got into our room. Amy wanted to take a shower and get comfortable. This was perfect since I had some setting up to do. I reached into a gym bag that I had brought and pulled out a bottle of Grey Goose and two bottles of cranberry juice (our favorite drink). Next, I gathered 3 boxes of scented tea candles and a few individual larger ones. I placed around 20 candles randomly around the room and lit them all. Finally, I whipped out my laptop and some portable speakers and put on a play list of light acoustic rock that I had assembled.

The mood was set. I changed into a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt and made a couple drinks. Just as I finished stirring our cranberry concoctions, Amy came out of the bathroom in her sheer pajamas and immediately froze.

“Aww, Craig. Look at all this.” She said.

“Well, I just wanted to make you feel comfortable.” I said as I handed her a drink.

“Well it looks like you’ve had this planned all along. Any other tricks up your sleeve?” She coyly inquired.

“Not just yet.” I replied as I raised my glass. “To the beginning of something beautiful.”

“Cheers!” she said as we both took a sip of our passion colored cocktails. “Ooh, Grey Goose. My favorite.”

“I know.”

We lay on the bed and shared a few drinks while we cuddled and casually chatted. It was nice to finally have her all to myself for an entire weekend. I had a lot in store for her, but didn’t want to rush things.

After about three drinks each, we were both getting loosened up. We were laying in the bed, spooning, while relaxing to the mellow beachy grooves of Jack Johnson. I was running my fingers across her skin, tracing the silhouette of her beautiful hourglass figure. I let my hand slip inside of her sheer tank top as I gently caressed her back. She responded by rolling towards me and onto her back, as my hand naturally found it’s way to her smooth, flat stomach. I moved in close and kissed her passionately. Our tongues danced together as we embraced tightly.

I pulled off her top to reveal those magnificent breasts. They I kissed my way from her mouth to her neck and down to her collarbone, my hands now kneading her tits and my fingers tweaking her nipples. As I my mouth reached her breasts I freed my hand to move in a more southerly direction. I slipped a finger in the top of her shorts and quickly learned that she wasn’t wearing panties. I tickled her hips and teased my way around her pubic area without touching her pussy. It was driving her crazy and I knew I was making her wet.

I pulled my body away from hers a pulled her shorts off, leaving her lying there before me naked. I took a moment and marveled at the beauty of this woman, and for a brief moment, it made me sad. I was troubled by the fact that a woman this beautiful could go her entire life without knowing true passion. I knew that it was time. Time to bring upon her enlightenment, and teach her the definition of making love.

I quickly removed the little clothes that I was wearing. I slid my right hand behind her head and my left arm behind the small of her back. I pulled her close to me and kissed her deeply, lovingly. I once again kissed my way slowly from her mouth to her neck, down to her shoulders and let my mouth find her breasts. I flicked and nibbled at her now stiff and perky nipples, teasing and pulling on them. Amy moaned and began to squirm beneath me.

I continued my oral assault on her skin. Moving slowly down her stomach to her hips. I kissed and licked my way down the tops of her thighs and back up the insides. With every kiss I moved closer and closer to her now dripping pussy. I could smell her sweetness and I yearned to indulge myself of her delicacies. Her pussy was beautiful.

My tongue traced along the outside of her pussy as I kissed her everywhere but where she craved me too. Her hips were gyrating in front of me. She fruitlessly tried to bring her pussy to my mouth, while I had every intention of teasing her as long as I could. I licked along the edges of her pussy lips and planted a firm kiss just above her clit. I pulled my face slightly away from her skin as I blew a gentle breeze of air down the length of her slit. This sent a shiver through her body as she twitched beneath me.

With that, I let my tongue part her pink pussy lips. I started at the bottom and curled my tongue as I licked my way up her dripping snatch. As I reached her clit, a pool of her sweet nectar had collected on my taste buds. Her flavor was divine, and I savored it as I let my rigid tongue flick over her clit. Her entire body quaked and she heaved her hips into my face. I had her right where I wanted her. All of her inhibitions and insecurities had now been replaced by a primitive pursuit of pleasure, and it was pleasure that I would give her.

I moved my tongue back down to her tight opening and slid my way in and out of her, gently preparing her for something much larger. She moaned, and wiggled beneath me. I knew it wouldn’t be long. I moved my mouth back up to her now swollen clit and wrapped my lips around it. I flicked my tongue over her erect love button and sucked it into my mouth. With each flick of my tongue I worked faster and harder and she moved more furiously and cried out incoherently. I slipped my finger inside of her pussy and quickly found her g-spot.

That was all it took. With a scream and violent shudder, her pussy clenched at my finer and her entire body seized. “Oh my god Craig, I’m Coooom, ooohhh.” She couldn’t finish the sentence as, flood of her sweet juices poured from her body and I lapped furiously trying not to miss a drop. Her orgasm continued in waves of pleasure and her body now quaked uncontrollably. Finally, she pulled away from me, her pussy too sensitive to touch. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close to me.

…………………………………………….

A few minutes later, Amy came to her senses. “Oh my god,” were the only words she could muster. I gazed at her with a smile of accomplishment, and she stared back at me with a glazed look of complete contentment on her face.

“Did you enjoy that?” I confidently inquired.

“That was amazing, no one has ever made me cum like that before in my life.” She enthusiastically replied.

“That was only the beginning. Are you ready for more?” I asked. She now noticed the large throbbing member that was pressed against her leg. Before she could even consider a response I had the tip of my now aching eight inches pressed gently at her opening. She quickly pulled away from me, her pussy still too sensitive.

“I don’t knooooo ooooooooh.” Was all she could get out as I slid my cock-head into her soaking wet love tunnel. I slowly pulled the head back out and pushed into her again, this time going just a tiny bit deeper. I repeated the process at least a dozen times. With each thrust I gave her a tiny bit more of my shaft until I had filled her completely. I thrust my hips forward and buried my shaft into her all the way down to the hilt.

She cried out and wrapped her legs around my back. I pulled my entire length from her tight pussy before slowly sliding it all the way back in, holding her body to mine for a brief moment before pulling back out of her. I steadily increased my pace as she began panting. With each thrust I pulled out of her completely and filled her completely. I fucked her like this for what felt like an eternity. She dug her heels into the small of my back as I pounded her sweet pussy harder and faster. Finally I felt my balls tighten and I began to fuck her furiously. Amy was now moaning louder with each thrust of my cock and with one final push, I felt the walls of her pussy start to shake. Her back arched and her entire body squeezed the life out of mine as I began to unload my hot sticky cum into her quivering twat. We cried out together as our orgasms surged through or bodies. My cum filled her opening and began to ooze out of her and I could feel our juices mixing together and running down my balls.

I collapsed on top of her. We fell asleep just like that; our bodies twisted together and my cock buried inside of her. This was just the beginning, and we both knew it.

…………………………………………….

Multiple orgasms… CHECK!
Orgasm from penetration… CHECK!

PRIMARY MISSION ACCOMMPLISHED!!!

 

[SweetErika]

Honestly, you started losing me in the first paragraph. The story rambles (cutting out some of the unnecessary info would be helpful) and there's a lot of repetition (e.g. starting every sentence in a paragraph with the same word).

I don't care for stories that "talk" to the reader with parenthetical phrases and stuff like, "So on with the story..."- just tell the story, don't tell me you're telling it, but that may just be a personal thing.

The paragraphs need to be broken up for Lit. You're missing some commas and other punctuation.

Overall, it's a good start, but needs a good edit. I'd suggest posting in the EF or finding a Volunteer Editor to help you streamline and make it more reader-friendly.

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

Honestly, you started losing me in the first paragraph. The story rambles (cutting out some of the unnecessary info would be helpful) and there's a lot of repetition (e.g. starting every sentence in a paragraph with the same word).

I don't care for stories that "talk" to the reader with parenthetical phrases and stuff like, "So on with the story..."- just tell the story, don't tell me you're telling it, but that may just be a personal thing.

The paragraphs need to be broken up for Lit. You're missing some commas and other punctuation.

Overall, it's a good start, but needs a good edit. I'd suggest posting in the EF or finding a Volunteer Editor to help you streamline and make it more reader-friendly.

Yep. What she said. I struggled through to the end. There's some confusion in the writting. For instance:

A few minutes later, Amy came to her senses. “Oh my god,” were the only words she could muster. I gazed at her with a smile of accomplishment, and she stared back at me with a glazed look of complete contentment on her face.

“Did you enjoy that?” I confidently inquired.

“That was amazing, no one has ever made me cum like that before in my life.” She enthusiastically replied.

Who is he talking to? Amy is the person you start with but I assume the dialogue is supposed to be between you and Elsie. You don't identify well and it's confusing.

Also, your dialogue is almost lacking. You'd be better off letting your characters talk and tell the story and leave out the mass discriptions.

Good beginning, but needs some work.

JJ