new marriage idea

[EJFan]

ok... i was talking with a good friend of mine the other day and we discussed a great new approach to marriage. this was partly the brain-child of brian jones (former, deceased rolling stone member and pussy expert).

instead of getting married " 'til death do us part," and winding up getting divorced (as more than half of all couples do), why not get married on a contract basis. you'd simply marry your SO by signing a contract for, say, five years. when that five years nears an end, you can "renew" for, say, a year or five years or what have you.

what do you all think?

 

[bisexplicit]

haha, I love your lack of romanticism.

 

[silverwhisper]

bah; this is just an excuse for EJ to finallly crack the 1k mark so he can insert a "vinnick 2006" title in his profile. :>

ed

 

[bisexplicit]

bah; this is just an excuse for EJ to finallly crack the 1k mark so he can insert a "vinnick 2006" title in his profile. :>

ed

Nah, its 'cause HT has been dead recently and we desperately need new topics. So, start discussing! hehe.

 

[Eilan]

bah; this is just an excuse for EJ to finallly crack the 1k mark so he can insert a "vinnick 2006" title in his profile.

He's almost there!

He should do what I did last night--go be a Playground word-game post whore. Now I can get back to (mostly) quality posts. Or not.

 

[silverwhisper]

[refuses to discuss]

 

[Eilan]

How about seven years instead of five? The seven-year itch and all that.

 

[EJFan]

you guys are so rude. and i thought we were friends.

i hadn't even thought of my post count. and just for that, i'm going to change my username when i hit 999.

now look... you've made me threadjack my own shit.

 

[EJFan]

How about seven years instead of five? The seven-year itch and all that.

that'd work... any term you'd like.

i think it's romantic... not that different from a pre-nup really. if you wanna stay married forever, just keep renewing the contract. if you fall apart, at least there's no legal expenses to contend with... and no hurt feeligns.

 

[muddpuppy]

I think your on to something EJ... If this gets out theres gonna be alot of pissed of divorce lawyers.

 

[Eilan]

you guys are so rude. and i thought we were friends.

Sorry about that. I'll just add your name to the ever-growing list of Lit males I've managed to offend/piss off.

if you wanna stay married forever, just keep renewing the contract.

Actually, my hubby and I discovered with our former spouses that the approximate length of forever is six years. Looks like my husband and I are just over halfway to forever.

I tend to be of the opinion that it's WAY too easy to get married, though.

 

[silverwhisper]

FWIW, i share that opinion, eilan.

EJ, i tend to view prenups as the romantic equivalent of farting during sex. :> no offense man, but i'm just not a fan of this one.

ed

 

[Eilan]

Call me naive, but I'd like to think that most people don't enter into a marriage thinking, "Gee, if this doesn't work out, I can always get divorced."

I certainly didn't think about that when my ex and I got married.

 

[HollyHawkk]

Something to think about true! but, why not by pass the legal marriage part and just live togeather than? Theese days you can still have children and give them either family name. I am pro Marriage, but this might be a good idea. However it may save on legal costs I think there would still be hurt feelings!

 

[EJFan]

Sorry about that. I'll just add your name to the ever-growing list of Lit males I've managed to offend/piss off.

i was just teasing... you can't piss me off, eilan. we're gonna be roomies, right?

I tend to be of the opinion that it's WAY too easy to get married, though.

this is an interesting point... elaborate please.

 

[EJFan]

Something to think about true! but, why not by pass the legal marriage part and just live togeather than? Theese days you can still have children and give them either family name. I am pro Marriage, but this might be a good idea. However it may save on legal costs I think there would still be hurt feelings!

i think living together is a wonderful thing... at least in theory. but in the US there are some significant legal advantages to being married. absurd as it may be.

 

[Ricwilly]

When I was younger I never wanted to get married, figured living together without strings was the way to go. Me and my SO lived together for six months and I had no intention of gettin married, got drunk one day and asked her. Before I could sober up it was a done deal. Been morn twenty years now. LOL. We happy too, go figure.
Peronally I think you oughta be able to marry the first time easy enough but if it don't work out thar oughta be a waitin period for the next one. Just my random thoughts on it.

 

[Eilan]

Something to think about true! but, why not by pass the legal marriage part and just live togeather than? Theese days you can still have children and give them either family name.

Welcome to Lit!

I would have no problem with living with my hubby without a piece of paper that makes it legal, IF we could get the legal benefits that married couples get. However, in my state, the constitutional amendment that was meant to prevent gay couples from marrying also strips rights from cohabiting couples.

I am pro Marriage, but this might be a good idea. However it may save on legal costs I think there would still be hurt feelings!

I'd think that almost any breakup would cause hurt feelings.

this is an interesting point... elaborate please.

It's relatively easy to get married. You get a license; if there's a waiting period in the state you want to get married in, then you wait a few days.

Sometimes couples jump into marriage for all the wrong reasons. Mandatory premarital counseling, or something similar, might not be a bad idea.

 

[HollyHawkk]

Reading posts here in Canada: I think it is the opposit here I think if your married or not it makes no diffrence to the Government. But, do'nt quote me on that cause I am not sure?

I was also thinking that this could acctual save relationships to around re-newal time the romance and suduction would have to be there to get some one to sign up again.

 

[Feistyred16]

I tend to be of the opinion that it's WAY too easy to get married, though.

My son is getting married in October...I just finished a HUGE question thingy sent home by the priest...(Catholics make non-catholics jump through hoops to get married.)
One of the questions were "Do you have any reason to think that they are not getting married for life, till death do they part?"
Another was "Do you know if anyone is "forcing them to get married against their will?"
Then I had to SWEAR to God that my answers were true and factual.
They have had 4 meetings with the church so far & must now sign up for a weekend retreat. I'm half expecting a letter next telling him that he must convert or he can't marry her.
It just cracks me up that Priests do marriage counseling. That's like asking someone who's never flown a plane to instruct a student pilot on flying.
I'm not bashing the Catholic faith...just didn't realize they had so many hoops that you had to jump through.

 

[Eilan]

I'm not bashing the Catholic faith...just didn't realize they had so many hoops that you had to jump through.

As a non-Catholic who was once married to a Catholic, I know EXACTLY where you're coming from.

*edited to add that I don't think the Church's counseling had any effect on the eventual outcome of my first marriage, and I still think that permarital counseling in general is a good idea. My ex and I DID consider issues that we wouldn't have otherwise considered.

 

[silverwhisper]

can somebody please explain to me why the catholic wedding ceremony is so freaking long, please? i mean, it looks fantastic, but c'mon, people are only human.

ed

 

[Eilan]

can somebody please explain to me why the catholic wedding ceremony is so freaking long, please? i mean, it looks fantastic, but c'mon, people are only human.

My ex and I had the Catholic ceremony sans Mass because he didn't want to do anything that I wouldn't be able to take part in. The non-Mass wedding isn't that much shorter; in fact, we deliberately chose longer readings. I kinda liked getting my money's worth out of my dress.

I once went to a church wedding that lasted all of 12 minutes. It took me longer than that to get to the church.

 

[Feistyred16]

can somebody please explain to me why the catholic wedding ceremony is so freaking long, please? i mean, it looks fantastic, but c'mon, people are only human.

ed

I've never been to a Catholic wedding...Are you telling me I have this to look forward to???



When I got married 25 years ago...
We were getting married in our hometown in the church I grew up going to. My husband never met the Preacher until the night before the wedding.
We basically showed up with a marriage license that we had gotten in another part of the state. Although I'd had a few phone conversations with him & my mother still attended the church, I was always amazed at the ease of it all.

 

[bisexplicit]

i hadn't even thought of my post count. and just for that, i'm going to change my username when i hit 999.

You have so many good names thought up though, so it won't be a problem if you have to change.